You think pat ever read LOTR?

[CumiaPoodle]

I had to read them and the hobbit because for a while I had a giant alcoholic violent step father who was only nice when he was hammered and reading the LOTR. This is before the movies. I was like 7 maybe. A lot of that shit went over my head.

I remember he called me into his room when he and my mother were separating, to talk. Which meant he was very drunk. I was in the second grade or I could have been younger.

he started off the conversation like this.. “they’re fucking animals” I went to say something and he opie steam rolled me. “My friend Frank, you know Frank, he just came home and he told me that there was four niggers jacking off to one piece of pornography. FOUR NIGGERS!! One piece of pornography. Can ya fucking believe that? Jerking off together like apes to one page of porn? Cumiapoodle, I came from a neighborhood like this one only there was more niggers than spics. Don’t take on any blacks with just your fist they don’t fight fair. But if you have to go for their legs. They got weak shins. Help me clean the rifles and I’ll read ya some more of the hobbit before I go to bed”

Maybe he did read them before the movies but idk if we had the same experience.

 

[Agent Smith]

Not a chance. No light sabres.

 

[CumiaPoodle]

I prefer ASOIAF tbh. I know I can’t grasp the literary genius of Tolkien or whatever. But I read them as an adult. They’re good but some parts just fucking drag on. They’re short books but still just fucking crawl.

 

[CumiaPoodle]

Not a chance. No light sabres.

I, in my heart, feel like he read them one time after the movies came out. Then attached it to his identity. Not knowing that those movies attracted tons of retards (I love the movies) the same way the books did in the 70s. Just a different group of lonely faggots praying someone think they’re deep and well read because they picked up a book about elves and dwarves.

He’s so fucking stupid he didn’t even pick the correct book for his made up persona. He would have tricked more people going with infinite jest.

 

[John Wayne Gacy]

I had to read them and the hobbit because for a while I had a giant alcoholic violent step father who was only nice when he was hammered and reading the LOTR. This is before the movies. I was like 7 maybe. A lot of that shit went over my head.

I remember he called me into his room when he and my mother were separating, to talk. Which meant he was very drunk. I was in the second grade or I could have been younger.

he started off the conversation like this.. “they’re fucking animals” I went to say something and he opie steam rolled me. “My friend Frank, you know Frank, he just came home and he told me that there was four niggers jacking off to one piece of pornography. FOUR NIGGERS!! One piece of pornography. Can ya fucking believe that? Jerking off together like apes to one page of porn? Cumiapoodle, I came from a neighborhood like this one only there was more niggers than spics. Don’t take on any blacks with just your fist they don’t fight fair. But if you have to go for their legs. They got weak shins. Help me clean the rifles and I’ll read ya some more of the hobbit before I go to bed”

Maybe he did read them before the movies but idk if we had the same experience.

I don't know if he read them, but I do know he's Lord of the Queens.

 

[guest]

That's a sad story.

 

[CumiaPoodle]

I don't know if he read them, but I do know he's Lord of the Queens.

The habitual liar

The fellowship of pedophiles

The two hovels

The return of the process server

 

[CumiaPoodle]

That's a sad story.

Nah dude it’s cool but I hear you bro. it was hilarious when I got older. When he bounced it was sad because I missed him and he was the only dude I ever called dad. But those are my favorite memories of him. Drunk cleaning guns telling me racist shit.

 

[Stent]

Some kind of abridged children's version with lots of pictures perhaps.

 

[BillyCorgan'sFallenTree]

Someone once pointed out that Pat raves about Nazis all day but he got the fantasy equivalent of "Sieg Heil" tattooed on his flabby arm. So I'm going with no he never read them and it's questionable if he even watched the movies. At least your step dad read the books, Pat only managed to get the drunk part down.

 

[CumiaPoodle]

Some kind of abridged children's version with lots of pictures perhaps.

Exactly in all seriousness. If your favorite fiction is that book (it was supposed to be one big book I think) and you write shit like he does. He didn’t learn anything from reading great authors. If you look up to the guy then think about how he would feel reading the stuff you’re writing.

Lol can you fucking imagine what Tolkien would say to pat if he read one of his books.

 

[John Wayne Gacy]

Some kind of abridged children's version with lots of pictures perhaps.

Even these are too advanced for him.

 

[guest]

Nah dude it’s cool but I hear you bro. it was hilarious when I got older. When he bounced it was sad because I missed him and he was the only dude I ever called dad. But those are my favorite memories of him. Drunk cleaning guns telling me racist shit.

It's okay, buddy. You're safe here. You can admit that the thing that made me sad deeply wounded you.

 

[Agent Smith]

I know I can’t grasp the literary genius of Tolkien or whatever.

Me either. I only read Tolkein as a kid to figure out what to do in this ridiculously hard text-based LOTR game and then a set of his books showed up on a birthday so I felt obligated.

 

[TorqueWheeler]

Maybe this one.

 

[DeadWithoutMyDavid]

I had to read them and the hobbit because for a while I had a giant alcoholic violent step father who was only nice when he was hammered and reading the LOTR. This is before the movies. I was like 7 maybe. A lot of that shit went over my head.

I remember he called me into his room when he and my mother were separating, to talk. Which meant he was very drunk. I was in the second grade or I could have been younger.

he started off the conversation like this.. “they’re fucking animals” I went to say something and he opie steam rolled me. “My friend Frank, you know Frank, he just came home and he told me that there was four niggers jacking off to one piece of pornography. FOUR NIGGERS!! One piece of pornography. Can ya fucking believe that? Jerking off together like apes to one page of porn? Cumiapoodle, I came from a neighborhood like this one only there was more niggers than spics. Don’t take on any blacks with just your fist they don’t fight fair. But if you have to go for their legs. They got weak shins. Help me clean the rifles and I’ll read ya some more of the hobbit before I go to bed”

Maybe he did read them before the movies but idk if we had the same experience.

Kinda funny your step dad's thing was to get shitfaced and read like elvish poetry and dwarf legends and shit

 

[CumiaPoodle]

Someone once pointed out that Pat raves about Nazis all day but he got the fantasy equivalent of "Sieg Heil" tattooed on his flabby arm. So I'm going with no he never read them and it's questionable if he even watched the movies. At least your step dad read the books, Pat only managed to get the drunk part down.

Ribs great fucking point. Yeah my step dad despite being a drunk who was always fighting people was well read and could spin a yarn.

One time he took me to that Outback Steakhouse chain that shut down I believe. While eating a blooming onion He said “ ya know that nigger bullshit you and your friends like to listen to? Give me a word and I’ll rhyme with it. Go as fast as you can”

It wasn’t rap but he could freestyle poetry really fast. He did it until the entree came then said “see i told ya! If I was black i could make a couple million being a rap singer that shit ain’t music.”

 

[CumiaPoodle]

It's okay, buddy. You're safe here. You can admit that the thing that made me sad deeply wounded you.

You’re actually probably right Terry, I’m pretty much the same guy he is which isn’t good lol.

 

[guest]

Kinda funny your step dad's thing was to get shitfaced and read like elvish poetry and dwarf legends and shit

Sounds pretty cool. I'll read the next time I'm drunk.

 

[BoringFaggot]

Just think about it...

If he did, he wouldn't solely reference the movies. He'd try to show off what a special boy he is for having read the books, which are great but not an easy read.