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What is a crazy carpet
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The Abe Vigoda Canadian Thanksgiving Spectacular Megathread
- Thread starter TheGhostOfAbeVigoda
- Start date
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It's a sheet of plastic with handles cut into the front that you sit on to slide down a snowy hill
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I can picture it. We used to use old circular metal Coca-Cola signs, you could sit right in them
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Also when i was a kid i got knocked ass-over-tit by some drunk adults on a sled going full speed at the old sledding hill near the blacks on the backroads
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Yeah, it's Canadian tradition for a drunk teenager to ruin the fun by taking some little kid who's all gassed from walking up the hill out by the legs accidentally. Kids would have those plastic snowboards too and make jumps. I saw an Asian kid attempt a flip and land right on his fuckin head one time. KO'd.
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The crazy thing is that even as little kid, i was bracing for the worst because they really knocked me off my feet, but i was fine when i landed. It was a big winter redneck hang. Bonfires, drinking, etc. The guy who owned the land's house was at the bottom of the hill and he was hosting the whole thing
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The thing I remember most about tobogganing when I was really young is my cousin's fucking dog humping the shit out of me any chance it got. It was a strong dog too. He'd really grab ahold of you. I'd be freaking out and wrestling with this dog trying not to get raped and everyone's just laughing at me. My friend in highschool had the same mix of dog and that dog also compulsively humped everyone. Border collie/lab mix. Humpers. Our other buddy tried to get a picture of the dog humping his leg and it took too long to turn the camera on and the dog blew a load on his leg. It was fucking disgusting.
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Welcome back to Canadian Thanksgiving. Does anyone want to watch me pretend to be a very sexy little duck?
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Also, yes, Turkey is not traditional. Only very sexy ducks.
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New year's is over and we have high hopes in year 3 of the Canadian calendar. (Shut up. I don't care how many times I make the same joke)
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Duck breast is so good
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And duck pussy
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Duck pussy has become so expensive since Trudeau came to power I have to get tofu duck pussy
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You can get a "Beyond Pussy Burger" at Canadian A&W and it's actually more calories than a regular pussy burger.
Another thing no one thinks of is there's mayonnaise on it, so it's not vegan.
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Also Donald Trump is now threatening a 20 percent tariff on our exports of duck pussy? That's going to only hurt the consumer. Of duck pussy.
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Btw that's so fucking stupid. I don't usually hate trump but we have a free trade agreement. We can fucking cut off power to like 10 states and take all your wood if we want to violate it.
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They're gonna blow us up, Turk. They're gonna nuke the wood and get balsa wood from China
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Can you imagine the flq just reorganized but to invade America.
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We're gonna get nuked before I even get the chance to fight Pete Gas from the Mean Street Posse.