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🎥 The Lolcow That Can't Stop Losing In Court - The Patrick Tomlinson Saga (Part 7)

Uncle J’s Sink Emporium

Enjoy prison, Y’munkoke
Forum Clout
31,978
Why did he bring up the pepperoni story?!?! He actually told a judge that made up nonsense.
He brings that up every time, it’s his A material. He’s too stupid to recognize an obvious hyperbolic joke and it just makes him look rediculous.

Not to ruin the bit but Rick, no one here thinks you’re actually grinding up children in your basement and more importantly, no one expects anyone else to believe that either. It wasn’t me who did it, but that wasn’t ever the point of the joke. The humor is in the absurdity of the whole thing and the funny flyer that went with it. They weren’t trying to frame you for a believable crime.

When you act like cops took it seriously you look like a clown and your made up story makes no sense. If cops really thought you had kidnapped children currently in your basement they wouldn’t have sent 2 beat cops to talk to you about it on your porch. It would be an actual SWATting, something you’ve never experienced before.
 
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chewtoycock

$200 worth of dead meat
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15,722
I just got around to listening and I have to come out to you the Owen A. Forems people and make it clear. I am not and never was a user of the kiwifarms. 6e1334da5e81f9e6727013582103788e.jpeg
 

IGotATreeOnMyHouse85

Stand Alone Fruit
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234,406
This has to be the most enraging aspect. What was he expecting the judge to do once he learned Pat had concealed evidence? I wish I could see the look on the judge's face when Patrick said "I don't remember sending that"
I wish the judge would have really leaned it to that once it was clear Pat was lying, but the whole thing was so ridiculous already with all the “child’s” , pepperoni story, and bizarre tough guy talk from Pat he just wanted everyone involved in this stupid mess to the get fuck out of his court room.
 

Petworth dude

Run PFG
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6,885
This has to be the most enraging aspect. What was he expecting the judge to do once he learned Pat had concealed evidence? I wish I could see the look on the judge's face when Patrick said "I don't remember sending that"
I think I'm not the first person to say this, but it appear Pat was expecting that BDA wouldn't appear for the hearing, which means the judge would only hear his side of the story and just rule in his favor.
 

Imager

STFUYSN
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58,637
I think I'm not the first person to say this, but it appear Pat was expecting that BDA wouldn't appear for the hearing, which means the judge would only hear his side of the story and just rule in his favor.
That's exactly what happened. Don't know if Nadolski is still lurking around here but my recollection is that Patrick was able to get an aggressive court date and Nadolski had maybe a day's notice to appear.
 

PorqueDealer

Portly Pepperoni Purveyor
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35,361
I think I'm not the first person to say this, but it appear Pat was expecting that BDA wouldn't appear for the hearing, which means the judge would only hear his side of the story and just rule in his favor.
It was also spread on the forums that BDA had deleted all the texts.
being an obedient rube, fatty read the forums and did da bit.

Like a true wethead he couldn't remember he had already fallen for this previously.
The fact that he didnt even recognize BDA with Dan at his hearing, after being thoroughly mogged in court opposite him shows how minced his thinking meats are.
 

quasi101

the $83,736.99 fugitive
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77,895
He brings that up every time, it’s his A material. He’s too stupid to recognize an obvious hyperbolic joke and it just makes him look rediculous.

Not to ruin the bit but Rick, no one here thinks you’re actually grinding up children in your basement and more importantly, no one expects anyone else to believe that either. It wasn’t me who did it, but that wasn’t ever the point of the joke. The humor is in the absurdity of the whole thing and the funny flyer that went with it. They weren’t trying to frame you for a believable crime.

When you act like cops took it seriously you look like a clown and your made up story makes no sense. If cops really thought you had kidnapped children currently in your basement they wouldn’t have sent 2 beat cops to talk to you about it on your porch. It would be an actual SWATting, something you’ve never experienced before.
performative stupidity
 

Uncle J’s Sink Emporium

Enjoy prison, Y’munkoke
Forum Clout
31,978
That's exactly what happened. Don't know if Nadolski is still lurking around here but my recollection is that Patrick was able to get an aggressive court date and Nadolski had maybe a day's notice to appear.
He was only there because I posted about the case here. Hero is a strong word but I’m not sure what else fits.
 

Imager

STFUYSN
Forum Clout
58,637
He's around.

The poor schmuck drove nine hours round trip from Indianapolis to Milwaukee TWICE in less than two days, probably still half in the bag when he showed up to court. I imagine Rick was shocked by the sheer, astounding autism of that feat when Andrew came stumbling into the courthouse just as the hearing was about to begin.
Patrick lost the hearing. He let the idiots win. He had every logistical advantage and the idiots still won.

I am not sure there has ever been a bigger loser than Patrick S Tomlinson. Like I was thinking earlier today about MC Hammer and how he went from multi-millionaire to working at a call center and how humiliating that must be, and he still is not as big of a loser as Patrick Tomlinson, since he has an actual job.
 

quasi101

the $83,736.99 fugitive
Forum Clout
77,895
Patrick lost the hearing. He let the idiots win. He had every logistical advantage and the idiots still won.

I am not sure there has ever been a bigger loser than Patrick S Tomlinson. Like I was thinking earlier today about MC Hammer and how he went from multi-millionaire to working at a call center and how humiliating that must be, and he still is not as big of a loser as Patrick Tomlinson, since he has an actual job.

You need to technicality tomlinson this. Since quasi won, BDA won, even mullen got a W.... that must mean they are not idiots according to fat logic

he turned $100,000+ of free money into -$70,000+. Streisand effected himself into kiwifarms and internet lolcow infamy. That seems like a win for the idiots, but since he never lets them win... must not be idiots then
 
G

guest

Guest
You need to technicality tomlinson this. Since quasi won, BDA won, even mullen got a W.... that must mean they are not idiots according to fat logic

he turned $100,000+ of free money into -$70,000+. Streisand effected himself into kiwifarms and internet lolcow infamy. That seems like a win for the idiots, but since he never lets them win... must not be idiots then
Patrick goes to the doctor. "Doctor, I am depressed. I can't let the idiots win, but I've lost three court cases, blew 170,000 dollars, lost my blue checkmark, got banned from Hoolies and, to a modest-sized following of cyberstalkers, am considered the biggest laughingstock of the internet."

The doctor paused and thinks for a moment. "You know what cheers me up when I'm feeling down? I go on the internet and laugh at this alcoholic fat mess of a man who can't stop responding to trolls. He's the biggest idiot in the world and doesn't realize it but he destroys my ribs. His name is Pigliacci."

"Doctor, I don't understand."

"Patrick, you ARE Pigliacci -- and you HAVE won. The idiot will never, ever win."
 
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