Six Figure Author

[Slackjawed Cow]

But it wasn’t even a lot of money lol. That’s the best part. He’s bragging about a minimum wage gig. And ultimately he was utterly incapable of doing it well enough to hang onto it.

Plus it was taxed at probably the highest percentage.

 

[Robert's Gift to Patty]

The good old days when pat thought he had the world by the short and curlies. I bet he never predicted he would be -$53k in debt and his home would depreciate 15% in a booming housing market in 4 short years. He got paid $33k per book on a 3 book deal.

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You can tell he's a rural, Midwestern rube in spite of his best efforts because he thinks six figures is a lot. I'd argue $150,000+ is "a lot" unless you are in NYC or California. Even then it's not that much for a family, only an individual. $100,000 is pretty easy if you put in some years after getting a decent degree. Fat, lazy bum.

 

[BakersfieldChimp]

You can tell he's a rural, Midwestern rube in spite of his best efforts because he thinks six figures is a lot. I'd argue $150,000+ is "a lot" unless you are in NYC or California. Even then it's not that much for a family, only an individual. $100,000 is pretty easy if you put in some years after getting a decent degree. Fat, lazy bum.

The problem with that, sweetie, is that Pat has no degree and no interest in putting in any years. Fat.

 

[Robert's Gift to Patty]

His handwriting atrocious like most lefties.

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Wait, but it leans to the right (/). Lefty writing leans the other way (\).

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

You can tell he's a rural, Midwestern rube in spite of his best efforts because he thinks six figures is a lot. I'd argue $150,000+ is "a lot" unless you are in NYC or California. Even then it's not that much for a family, only an individual. $100,000 is pretty easy if you put in some years after getting a decent degree. Fat, lazy bum.

Thats why he acted like he won the lottery and it was going to be a regular thing that would last years. Pat thought he was high society. Good thing he at least got a house before it was all blown on booze,travel,motorcycles. Sure the house lost like $15k in value in the last few years but it could have been worse after losing to quasi. Seems like the house is protected from losing it to quasi unless he wants to spend more money trying to grief pat.

 

[BakersfieldChimp]

Thats why he acted like he won the lottery and it was going to be a regular thing that would last years. Pat thought he was high society. Good thing he at least got a house before it was all blown on booze,travel,motorcycles. Sure the house lost like $15k in value in the last few years but it could have been worse after losing to quasi. Seems like the house is protected from losing it to quasi unless he wants to spend more money trying to grief pat.

They did refinance it when rates were low, though. So they have nearly zero equity and they're certainly close to losing it at any time.

 

[guest]

The good old days when pat thought he had the world by the short and curlies. I bet he never predicted he would be -$53k in debt and his home would depreciate 15% in a booming housing market in 4 short years. He got paid $33k per book on a 3 book deal.

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Words can’t express how much how I appreciate how you brothamen took this from him although he basically did it to himself.

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

They did refinance it when rates were low, though. So they have nearly zero equity and they're certainly close to losing it at any time.

I forgot who dug into it ( martin maybe?) but I think after the re-fi there was only $10k on the books for the place.

 

[BakersfieldChimp]

I forgot who dug into it ( martin maybe?) but I think after the re-fi there was only $10k on the books for the place.

Sounds about right. They refinanced it so soon after buying.

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

Sounds about right. They refinanced it so soon after buying.

 

[Salted Earth Truffle]

I forgot who dug into it ( martin maybe?) but I think after the re-fi there was only $10k on the books for the place.

Holy fuck. They’re not young, either. What’s the plan, Pat? You don’t even work at 42, are you going to be a greeter at Walmart until you die?

 

[Salted Earth Truffle]

Sounds about right. They refinanced it so soon after buying.

How did Niki even qualify for a mortgage with a bankruptcy on the books? Even though it was more than seven years later, I can’t imagine she could get a decent rate on anything.

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

Holy fuck. They’re not young, either. What’s the plan, Pat? You don’t even work at 42, are you going to be a greeter at Walmart until you die?

Id imagine he will be looking for a frivolous lawsuit to claim victim to. AKA The California lottery

 

[Salted Earth Truffle]

Id imagine he will be looking for a frivolous lawsuit to claim victim to. AKA The California lottery

Slip and fall lawsuit arc when? That’s how lowlifes do it in California.

 

[EraGodless]

The good old days when pat thought he had the world by the short and curlies. I bet he never predicted he would be -$53k in debt and his home would depreciate 15% in a booming housing market in 4 short years. He got paid $33k per book on a 3 book deal.

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All of this is before Norm/11, but we are The Bad Guys?

 

[WifeStoreWill]

How did Niki even qualify for a mortgage with a bankruptcy on the books? Even though it was more than seven years later, I can’t imagine she could get a decent rate on anything.

That’s probably why the original mortgage was some seller financed bullshit. They couldn’t qualify for a real one.

 

[Salted Earth Truffle]

That’s probably why the original mortgage was some seller financed bullshit. They couldn’t qualify for a real one.

Oh wow, I didn’t know that. And I bet they bought it from a family member or something too.

 

[Mr-Wrinkle-Paws]

6XL

 

[EraGodless]

No matter how many times I see this I can't help but shudder with embarrassment for him. What a pathetic simp. Look how stiff and uncomfortable she is. Look at him. Half subservient dog, half faggot mama's boy. A live alligator would have had a better chance of having sex with her.

She's the hottest girl we've had up here

 

[Suetonius]

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Leg crossed away from him (body language says no shot for Pat), face turned away so there's no photo evidence she was ever near him, female friend sharing conspiratorial look of "he's gross, isn't he" across the couch. Piglet blissfully unaware of his innate ability to repel the opposite sex (or is he? Cross eyes suggest inner conflict.) Happy to be there and happy to be eating.

Patty wasn't even one of those friendzoned losers. He was the punchline to the girls locker room talk. "Who would you rather fuck if your life depended on it? Pat Tomlinson or *insert cartoonishly grotesque alternative.*"
Pat never won.

If someone wrote this about me i’d kill myself.