Six Figure Author

[Salted Earth Truffle]

I'm 100% sure he isn't left handed.

I’ve definitely seen photos of him doing shit right-handed. I’m sure he’ll claim to be a super-special ambidextrous boy.

 

[Suetonius]

Also he thinks getting paid to write is some accomplishment. How many shitty uninspired artists make a living creating complete garbage? I’d respect him more if he didn’t make a cent but his writing was actually good.

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

I'm 100% sure he isn't left handed.

 

[Meownaw]

View attachment 124560

Still standing by it.

 

[guest]

Fat hands

 

[guest]

Leg crossed away from him (body language says no shot for Pat), face turned away so there's no photo evidence she was ever near him, female friend sharing conspiratorial look of "he's gross, isn't he" across the couch. Piglet blissfully unaware of his innate ability to repel the opposite sex (or is he? Cross eyes suggest inner conflict.) Happy to be there and happy to be eating.

Patty wasn't even one of those friendzoned losers. He was the punchline to the girls locker room talk. "Who would you rather fuck if your life depended on it? Pat Tomlinson or *insert cartoonishly grotesque alternative.*"
Pat never won.

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

Still standing by it.

His handwriting atrocious like most lefties.

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

View attachment 124565
Leg crossed away from him (body language says no shot for Pat), face turned away so there's no photo evidence she was ever near him, female friend sharing conspiratorial look of "he's gross, isn't he" across the couch. Piglet blissfully unaware of his innate ability to repel the opposite sex (or is he? Cross eyes suggest inner conflict.) Happy to be there and happy to be eating.

Patty wasn't even one of those friendzoned losers. He was the punchline to the girls locker room talk. "Who would you rather fuck if your life depended on it? Pat Tomlinson or *insert cartoonishly grotesque alternative.*"
Pat never won.

 

[Salted Earth Truffle]

Can’t believe we got a photo of Pat taste-testing his first ever batch of spooky sausage.

 

[porquedealer]

Quasi could answer all this if he hits with the exam, however...

Angry Robot prob have no issue with him, he's managed to make profit on 2/3 books.
His advance was likely £5k (GBP) that's usually the top end for new authors at AR. Break even on a print run is 1000 copies sold, he has done this (for two).
He most likely received a couple of decent royalty checks the first couple of years for the sales over 1000 on his first book.
Since then royalty checks might cover a meatloaf monday or two.
Note his nielson numbers (start to jan 2023, he would have sold more than this but unlikely to be much more than 20% of the number given)

Ark: 2656 = 1656 books x $2 royalty (probably generous) rounded up to $3500
Tridents Forge : 1098 so allowing for the %20 lets say he has 400 royalties = $800
Children of the Divide: 540 = no royalties. net loss/possible break even

So probably (generous) AR earnings
3x $6k (advance for each book) + 3500 + 800 = $22.3k

TOR numbers. If we assume a BIG $30k per book advance.
Possible royalties on Gatecrashers ~ $500 max, though they could have a higher threshold due to the big advance so poss nothing.
the other books have sold in the hundreds. so nothing there. but lets be SUPER generous and say his total income from TOR was $100k

$100k (TOR) + $22.3k (AR) / 8 year career (2015-present) = $15,287.50 a year.
For his blog pieces, op eds, and bigfoot science show appearances = $5k (generous) would bring that nearer
$16k a year
/52
$306 per week
/ 40 hours = $7.65/hr

Other than fucking around kids museums, hooli's and farting into his blanket, his 'job' has been the equivalent of a minimum wage worker for nearly the last decade.

He needed the PPP loan, despite being an author for nearly 6 years, to pay the balance on his $12k motorcycle.

 

[fricklefrackle]

View attachment 124558View attachment 124559

 

[guest]

[URL='https://ibb.co/Zgb3136']

[/URL]

No matter how many times I see this I can't help but shudder with embarrassment for him. What a pathetic simp. Look how stiff and uncomfortable she is. Look at him. Half subservient dog, half faggot mama's boy. A live alligator would have had a better chance of having sex with her.

 

[Salted Earth Truffle]

Left-handed people also die younger than righties. What a shame.

 

[BakersfieldChimp]

Age.

 

[Salted Earth Truffle]

Age.

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

Can’t believe we got a photo of Pat taste-testing his first ever batch of spooky sausage.

View attachment 124567

Id love to know the context. Looks like a gay "group date night" where mom allowed him and kyle to have girls from school over for supervised chili dogs, salad, and a movie or he is trying fuck one of his cousins again. Since she has the remote he might have been the guest. Either way he was definitely friendzoned. Just spitballin here.

 

[Kim_Jong_Poon_]

View attachment 124560

That's some incredible autism, brotherman. You are truly blessed

 

[NikisGreasyBeerFarts]

Let's not pretend that getting a lot of money for a book is a big accomplishment. Stephen King wrote about children having a gangbang and he's a millionaire

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

Let's not pretend that getting a lot of money for a book is a big accomplishment. Stephen King wrote about children having a gangbang and he's a millionaire

The funny part is looking back at these posts knowing how his next 6 years play out and that he wasnt able to maintain that same momentum and actually went backwards. He really hasnt had anything to brag about since then.

 

[Salted Earth Truffle]

Let's not pretend that getting a lot of money for a book is a big accomplishment. Stephen King wrote about children having a gangbang and he's a millionaire

But it wasn’t even a lot of money lol. That’s the best part. He’s bragging about a minimum wage gig. And ultimately he was utterly incapable of doing it well enough to hang onto it.