My favorite Pat lie

[guest]

Pat claiming he's been in not one, but TWO knife fights takes the cake, it makes me laugh every time I remember him saying that. Who the fuck gets in a knife fight unless you're in a dusty alley somewhere in Tunisia??

What's your favorite Pat lie?

 

[Torque’sHeadBump]

What's your favorite Pat lie?

Not obese by any medical standard.

Never abandoned his daughter.

Runs half marathons.

Works out.

 

[Harry Powell]

The knife fighting is actually up there with the kamikaze pilot and the gun battles between Star Trek and Star Wars fans in being an insanely obvious lie.

But what do I know, maybe he was in a Clockwork Orange gang during his wild youth.

 

[Honoria]

them boys flew in the mud over my house

 

[Torque’sHeadBump]

them boys flew in the mud over my house

Still no idea what that means but it does bust my ribs

 

[The Talking Dead]

The gym brotosaurus story is the funniest to me. It just has so many ludicrous details that give it away as being made up.

 

[Petworth dude]

My favorite Pat lie is "Dan Mullen doesn't have a penis, stlaker. I. Do."

I can attest to the fact that Dan does indeed have a penis because he forced it into my underage rectum against my will during a family trip to Boston in 1999.

 

[Jenna]

Attractive single women will somehow acquire my number and then send me unsolicited nudes, to which I reply that I'm happily married and delete them. This is a regular occurrence in my life.

 

[Toothless Enthusiast]

 

[The Talking Dead]

them boys flew in the mud over my house

Still no idea what that means but it does bust my ribs

I think it's so funny because it's such a ridiculously pretentious way to word that, even if it is true. I'm sure in his head he sounded like Richard Dreyfuss in Stand By Me when he tweeted that out but he just came across like a fat, effeminate cunt, which he is.

 

[guest]

I got whiplash from reading that

 

[RaggotFetard]

Definitely the story of the kid that tried to carjack him at gunpoint, but didn’t know how to drive stick, so they both just stared at each other awkwardly, and the kid asked him to teach him.

 

[Jen_Tomlinson]

Definitely the story of the kid that tried to carjack him at gunpoint, but didn’t know how to drive stick, so they both just stared at each other awkwardly, and the kid asked him to teach him.

Wow that cannoT be true

 

[RaggotFetard]

Wow that cannoT be true

It obviously never happened, but he said it did. I don’t archive anything, but someone here might have the tweet or blog where he told this tall tail.

 

[The Talking Dead]

Wow that cannoT be true

I don't think he said the guy asked him to teach him but the rest is true. iirc he said the guy just got out and walked off. The thing is that's not outside the realm of something that could happen, especially in his shitty slum neighborhood, but since it's pig telling it he doesn't deserve the benefit of the doubt.

 

[RaggotFetard]

I don't think he said the guy asked him to teach him but the rest is true. iirc he said the guy just got out and walked off. The thing is that's not outside the realm of something that could happen, especially in his shitty slum neighborhood, but since it's pig telling it he doesn't deserve the benefit of the doubt.

Oh really? I could’ve sworn that last part was part of the story. Ah well, just as fat of him.

 

[IGotATreeOnMyHouse85]

Any bar fight stories - especially how he brags that anyone causing trouble immediately backs when he comes over and tells them “yes, I would love to take this outside”

 

[IGotATreeOnMyHouse85]

 

[Jims_Maroon_Pants]

There are so many great ones, but the knife fights have to be at the top. He doesn't understand how real stabbings go and thinks it's some west side story bullshit.
A very close second has to be the blubbering Jap

 

[Jims_Maroon_Pants]

View attachment 187722

See bullying works, it's been so long since he's come up with a banger like this.