I’m setting the alarm for 5:45 am…

[Turk February]

I woke up this morning
with a bad hangover
And my penis was missing again
This happens all the time
It's detachable

This comes in handy a lot of the time
I can leave it home when I think
it's going to get me in trouble
Or I can rent it out
when I don't need it

But now and then I go to a party
Get drunk
And the next the morning,
I can't for the life of me
Remember what I did with it

First I looked around my apartment
And I couldn't find it
So I called up the place
where the party was
They hadn't seen it either

I asked them to check
the medicine cabinet
'Cause for some reason I
leave it there sometimes
But not this time
So I told them if it
pops up to let me know

I called a few people
who were at the party
But they were no help either
I was starting to get desperate
I really don't like being
without my penis for too long

It makes me feel like less of a man
And I really hate to having to sit down
Every time I take a leak

After a few hours of searching the house
And calling everyone I could think of
I was starting to get very depressed
So I went to the Kiev and ate breakfast

Then as I walked down Second
Avenue toward St. Mark's Place
Where all those people sell used
books and other junk on the street
I saw my penis lying on a blanket
next to a broken toaster oven
Some guy was selling it

I had to buy it off him
He wanted 22 bucks but
I talked him down to 17
I took it home, washed it off
And put it back on

I was happy again, complete
People sometimes tell me
I should get it permanently
attached but I don't know
Even though sometimes
it's a pain in the ass
I like having a detachable penis

I heard that song on college radio when I was 10 or 11 in the car on the way to school. Still love it.

 

[Nigger John]

I want to walk more!!!!

 

[StlakerFatti]

You walk so we can run, Nigger Jim. God with us.

 

[Nigger John]

Part 2 in the AM… omg! So excited!!!

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

The sun and the rain and an appleseed.

 

[Nigger John]

The sun and the rain and an appleseed.

I’ve also been doing a weighted backpack .

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

I’ve also been doing a weighted backpack .

Getting swole for Christ

 

[Nigger John]

Getting swole for Christ

I’ll be happy if just no bacon approved

 

[Dog Eater]

I’ve also been doing a weighted backpack .

 

[Nigger John]

It was a good walk. Only 5 hrs of sleep but it’s what ever

 

[StlakerFatti]

It was a good walk. Only 5 hrs of sleep but it’s what ever

Donald Trump sleeps 4h and plants up to 17 apple seeds a day

 

[Nigger John]

Donald Trump sleeps 4h and plants up to 17 apple seeds a day

He also eats McDonald’s

 

[StlakerFatti]

He also eats McDonald’s

We have mods that regularly eat scat.