Here we go again: "SHOTS FIRED" in the hovel

[Honey Badger]

I think that's it. He imagines that if he explains what's going on, everyone will be on his side - that's why he got super pissy when the judge didn't sentence BDA to a penal colony ("I thought I'd be heard!").

This could be his way of finally getting the FBI to listen.

But then why was he such a hateable cunt in that leaked audio? Wouldn’t he want to come off as the sympathetic victim of evil nazi cyber-stlakers?

Something ain’t adding up…..

 

[The Fuchitive]

Cops probably told Pat case is closed from last time and are about to release body cam footage

This is actually a reasonable theory

 

[NortheastPhilly]

The question is did the MPD have the balls to return after Pat banished them to the shadow realm?

 

[guest]

Cause he's a cunt and didn't know some hot chick was recording him from down the street. Remember too... His tiny cock was poking out of his robe and the female officer was probably laughing. Humiliating situation, even though he staged it. He thought the cops would bow to the pig and phone the CIA cybercrimes squad.

But then why was he such a hateable cunt in that leaked audio? Wouldn’t he want to come off as the sympathetic victim of evil nazi cyber-stlakers?

Something ain’t adding up…..

 

[FurBurger]

"No officer child iT is noT an ex-wife!"
Holy shit, what if it was?

What if it's his daughter?

What court would convict her of prank calling the father that abandoned her?

 

[Opesterino]

We know Patrick doesn't understand how the law works.

If this is him doing it, this is how I speculate that he's thinking about it.

• Holy shit I owe Quasi a bunch of money
• It's getting larger by the month. I'll never be able to repay it.
• I'll set up my own SWATting and blame Owen.
• This will trigger the FBI go to after Owen and Quasi.
• They will be convicted of felony texting and I won't have to pay any money.
• In fact, they'll have to pay me for emotional trauma.

This is why he's a famous author and you're not.

He seen how much $$ that one thing got from crying about a 'swatting' on twitter so pig wants a taste now.

 

[FurBurger]

But then why was he such a hateable cunt in that leaked audio? Wouldn’t he want to come off as the sympathetic victim of evil nazi cyber-stlakers?

Something ain’t adding up…..

Because he called in the report for his half of the half-hovel; expecting them to leave the other half (where he was sleeping) alone.

Unfortunately, real cops are more persistent than in Pat's limited imagination, and so they cleared both halves of the hovel. Pat gets put in cuffs, Pat gets led into the street (away from the potential gunman), everybody laughs at Pat's cock, Pat oinks and squeals at everyone, Pat keeps the whole affair secret (knowing that he's Fatricked it up and we'll laugh at him) until pests start bothering him with the audio.

At least, that's my theory.

 

[BakersfieldChimp]

Because he called in the report for his half of the half-hovel; expecting them to leave the other half (where he was sleeping) alone.

Unfortunately, real cops are more persistent than in Pat's limited imagination, and so they cleared both halves of the hovel. Pat gets put in cuffs, Pat gets led into the street (away from the potential gunman), everybody laughs at Pat's cock, Pat oinks and squeals at everyone, Pat keeps the whole affair secret (knowing that he's Fatricked it up and we'll laugh at him) until pests start bothering him with the audio.

At least, that's my theory.

I'm just going to go ahead and move all of this into the '100% CONFIRMED' column.

 

[DeadWithoutMyDavid]

What I'm hearing is we'll eventually get TWO sets of bodycam footage

 

[Gay Faggot.]

No more posts about that SWAT guy. We don’t even know who he is.

 

[Момент Силышенко]

Fawwwwkin hell whoever is doing it isn't even current on pat, they should have known he was at yet another convention

I knew it was those retard gopniks that Torque Wheeler's real account ridiculed, with more humor than he ever displayed on stage. One of those actually threatened to swat him if I remember.

 

[BudDickman]

It's interesting that the latest call only has one entry for Status History:

9:34 pm

Assignment Completed

The last one where Pat was manhandled and cuffed before his little tantrum had two entries, and so do most calls that aren't follow ups or "Special Assignments":

1:02 am	Advised/Referral
1:02 am	Service in Progress

This makes it seem like the police did as Pat instructed and disregarded the call. In that case, if this is an actual stlaker doing this, they aren't accomplishing anything except validating Pat's victim status.

 

[Upton Baby Sinclair]

I heard on the Kiwi Farms secret forum there’s talk of someone there who goes by SommervilleDan that called in these fake police reports to launch the comeback of his popular podcast where he does these Brian Gilgore style rants. It’s crazy how they’re always breaking our do not interact rule over there.

 

[Treat Yourself]

This makes it seem like the police did as Pat instructed and disregarded the call.

In the not too distant future, Rick is sprawled out on the ground, his pink fart blankie wrapped around his girthy torso. He breathes heavily as parts of the blankie begin to turn red. Smoke hangs in the air from Niki's last decision.
"911, what's your emergency?"
"My wife just shot me, I'm at 2611 Oakland. It's a duplex, look it up."
"Very funny sir. We've been informed by that resident that all calls like this are to be treated as phony. *click*"
The cell phone falls from his fat, swollen hand. As his vision goes dark, he has a harrowing realization:
The idiots won.

 

[AntsBatteryCharge]

But then why was he such a hateable cunt in that leaked audio?

That's my secret, child. I am always a hateable cunt.

What a rude dude

He really is a lewd, crude, rude bag of pre-chewed food, duuuuuuude

 

[Dummy Gaynuts]

He really is a lewd, crude, rude bag of pre-chewed food, duuuuuuude

you forgot his bad attitude

 

[BillyCorgan'sFallenTree]

Did the cops actually return to the hovel? I thought they had been insTucTed to never reTurn.

 

[AntsBatteryCharge]

you forgot his bad attitude

IT is the greaTesT film of all Time, aTalker. Prison.

 

[HotDogJoe]

I heard on the Kiwi Farms secret forum there’s talk of someone there who goes by SommervilleDan that called in these fake police reports to launch the comeback of his popular podcast where he does these Brian Gilgore style rants. It’s crazy how they’re always breaking our do not interact rule over there.

Of all those Kiwi Farmers, that Dan guy seems like one of the most troublesome. Tell him to behave!!

(Anthony Cumia reference, Dan)

 

[Spraggy]

I don’t think anyone who actively posts here would be so stupid to make fake reports like this

It’s either Pat/Niki/Rakfaggy, a kiwifag or some unknown lingerer