Where we at with the school bus memories?

[RobertMewler]

The boys who'd sit in the back would loudly play music like Iron Maiden and Van Halen. I hated that they did that at first because I like peace and quiet but I eventually came around to enjoying it.

One kid farted and its awful smell stunk up the whole section. Another kid yelled at him that a fart means he's got shit near his asshole so he should just shit instead of kill us with his farts. I was fascinated by that biological knowledge.

One time a boy sitting behind me put pen ink in my hair. I was later told it was because he had a crush on me but I couldn't comprehend why he'd do something so horrible to out of love.

There was the regular bus and then the late bus; for when students stayed after school to do sports or whatever. The late bus had a shorter route so it would drop me off much further from my house (about a mile). So I'd have to walk on the long road cut into the woods to get home. One time I stopped to watch one of the local military base planes fly overhead. I heard a rustling and turned to see a small bear behind me. It crossed the road then followed me as I walked. It walked parallel with me when I made the turn onto my street (but in the woods alongside a field) until I finally was close enough to my house to run inside. The whole time I was walking I was praying to God to please let me live (which is funny now because the bear was just a youngster and obviously curious rather than really predatory). I was so relieved to get home. I ran straight to my room. A few minutes later I heard my mother slam the back door. She said she ran in because she had been out in the back yard when all of a sudden she saw a bear scratching its back on a tree (probably the same bear - so it followed me all the way home).

 

[RaggotFetard]

Single mother? We don’t really count Santa Ana or Anaheim as Orange County.

Orange

 

[RaggotFetard]

After 8th grade they didn't do a school bus for students. Instead we would get a bus pass that worked on every MBTA bus in Boston and the surrounding cities. Not limited to the city we lived in. So we would just take the bus into the city and skip regularly. The driver didn't care because he wasn't a school bus driver, he was a regular bus driver still dropping other passengers. They knew every time we were skipping but couldn't do a thing about it even if they wanted to. Didn't cost is anything either. You just had to request the pass from the main office in school and they'd give it to you.

That actually sounds pretty cool, brotherman. I’m sure growing up in a big city is exciting and makes you wisen up and all that, but I’m grateful for my upbringing. On the plus side, I didn’t grow up around blacks at all. Still never interact with them hardly ever, and all the good stuff that comes along with that (never been mugged, car break-in, etc), they just don’t really exist in OC. Whenever I’m in a big city, they make me uneasy and watching enough Worldstar has taught me to never relax around them.

 

[Upton Baby Sinclair]

Orange

Hopefully not still.

 

[RaggotFetard]

Hopefully not still.

Nice try, Patrick.

 

[Jenna]

I had "Closer" by NIN in my head, and without thinking sung out the line I wanna fuck you like an animal. I was savagely roasted because all the girls sat in the front of the bus, so clearly I was expressing my desire to fuck another middle school boy like an animal.

Another time coming back from a game, one of the older boys chucked a half-eaten thing of nachos (with the hot gooey cheese) into a passing convertible and then everyone pointed and laughed at the convertible. Oh my god was he upset.

 

[Brooke Shields]

Catholic school and only would ride with a very small amount of people
Driver let 2 older kids body-slam eachother over the seats constantly while my (still younger than them) older brother and I would watch and laugh
Same driver missed our stop constantly, would slam on the brakes(if my mom was lucky) and we'd run down to get in, otherwise we'd walk back home and she'd drive us. No clue if he was truly on something or just ingrained in old routes

Side schoolbus memory: saw some cardinal acting all fucked up in the middle of the yellow lines, can't remember how it got there but kept on thinking I had a chance to run out and save it since there were gaps in traffic. The bird was swaying back and forth from the giant cars passing it by, finally here comes my bus and for whatever reason it tilts far enough forward that it perfectly gets its head obliterated by the bus' tires.
Got to see it's corpse at the end of the day and it was still sitting there like a Tom & Jerry cartoon.
Maybe the guy did it on purpose

 

[Torque’sHeadBump]

I’m sure growing up in a big city is exciting and makes you wisen up and all that

Nothin’ like growin up as a youngster in North Bergen, cocksucka. I learned a lotta shit in the streets that serve me now, especially from the Puerto Rican bodega owner on 135th street

 

[DiarrheaDick]

Memories that stand out:
-Fat 11th grade chick grabbed my 7th grade weiner on a dare
-Dude who sat in front of me put out such a putrid, brimstone fart that made one girl puke, which in turn made another puke
-Bus driver ran over a kid's dog while pulling away from a stop
-Almost went over a cliff in a snow storm

You'd think memory 4 would be memory 1, but hey, got a boner.

 

[Smeckler's Powder]

 

[Torque’sHeadBump]

Memories that stand out:
-Fat 11th grade chick grabbed my 7th grade weiner on a dare
-Dude who sat in front of me put out such a putrid, brimstone fart that made one girl puke, which in turn made another puke
-Bus driver ran over a kid's dog while pulling away from a stop
-Almost went over a cliff in a snow storm

You'd think memory 4 would be memory 1, but hey, got a boner.

Fawk I remember now the first time I saw a girl’s tits was on the bus to school in my freshman year of high school. Had a huge crush on her and she was hot half Latina / half white chick with nice B cups. I was frothing all day

 

[Dennyislife]

Lived near a tourist site. Would wait for the bus by the road that leads to the coach parking area for all the day trippers. Would get Japanese/American/Chinese people taking photos of us in our school uniforms. Makes me laugh that some photos of me and my school friends are in photo albums all over the world.

Other than that nothing much of note. We rode the same bus as Joe public.

 

[DiarrheaDick]

Fawk I remember now the first time I saw a girl’s tits was on the bus to school in my freshman year of high school. Had a huge crush on her and she was hot half Latina / half white chick with nice B cups. I was frothing all day

I don't know why your comment reminded me of this specifically but there was this chick who sat at my table in study hall my senior year who had a big fivehead and huge tits. We nicknamed her frankentitties and used to follow her around groaning like Frankenstein. She was a good chick, she actually let the blousehounds out for us once in the aerobics room during gym. My girl at the time broke up me for like a week over it. High school was fucking hilarious.

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

One time when I was in like grade 5 or something like that, before we even left the school we were all on the bus but the driver wasn't. My buddy's little brother and this other kid were play wrestling but then my buddy's brother dropped an actual huge DDT on this kid in the aisle. The kid was unconscious and like half the bus took turns stomping the shit out of the kid and spitting on him. He was in the retard class after that. Poor fucker.

Another time when I was younger, there was an ostrich farm down the road from me and when we got there to pick up the girl who lived there, there was a shitshow going down. Her donkey was on the road freaking out, and her dogs were running around. The dogs followed her onto the bus and my fag bus driver who sounded like Kip from Napoleon Dynamite started losing his fucking mind screaming, terrified of a basset hound and a lab while all the kids were overjoyed that these dogs are on the bus.

Her dad was on the road trying to get the donkey to come back and it tried to bite him so he starts full on decking this thing in the face and some older kid in the back was like "Holy shit, some guy just punched Ricki's dad in the face!!" Which to this day is hilarious to me. We were there for like half an hour while the bus driver shrieked while nobody would allow these dogs to exit the bus and her dad fought with the donkey. The bus driver kept yelling out the door at the dad like "COME GET THESE GODDAMNED DOGS OFF MY GODDDAMNED BUS!" and eventually the dad was like "I kinda got my FUCKING HANDS FULL, FAGGOT!" and the whole bus just died laughing at the driver and he shut right the fuck up.

 

[CarolMaxheinie]

In first grade my Mom asked the bus driver if he’d like something small for Christmas, as a token of gratitude for being a real ass dude. He was like 80 years old, but a happy soul. He knew we were dirt poor and told her he was fine, just saying “thanks” was enough. So, she asked me to spy on him and see if he had any hobbies, or needed a glasses case, or something small. The only thing I found notable was one little vice, so come January, a six year old Carol proudly handed him a brand new pouch of Levi Garrett Chewing Tobacco. It made his day, and I learned that making little lifestyle notes and showing an interest in humanity builds friendships and makes people happy.

And then he molested some kids I think, but that was unrelated to his nicotine fix.

 

[ElectricLightKazooII]

The sticks route.

I was a kid on the sticks route, too. A big "development" of unmaintained dirt roads and shitty mobile homes. My mom would take me to school in the morning and I'd take the bus home. For a long time there were known Mexican streets and White Trash streets. It was incredible how many little Mexican kids lived on one street, it would take like ten minutes for all of 'em to file out of the bus and into their mom's '93 Suburban with no license plates.

One notable moment was around 6th or 7th grade when we were all greasy pubescent hillbillies and one girl had just gotten off the bus. Over the summer she had obtained an obscenely large ass and tits. My neighbor watched her as she walked to her rotten singlewide and he said to me "look at the shitter on that critter!" And we loffed. He's on parole now I think from some drug charge.

Another moment was on 9/11 when we were on the way home one kid kept saying that the Nazis had come back. He went to prison, too, I believe.

 

[stealthygeek]

Once we were on a field trip and the guy in the car behind us was getting road head. Heavy traffic so the show went on for a while. This was before I had ever seen real porn so it was a huge deal.

 

[DeadWithoutMyDavid]

In 7th grade I was sitting in the back with all the other badass motherfuckers, when someone noticed a much-disliked lady teacher was driving behind us. Another kid jumped into the aisle, dropped his pants, and mooned her. The next day we all got called to this teacher's classroom and interrogated as a group, with her trying to get us to rat on the guilty party or we'd all be punished. I was exonerated because I was a fat kid and it clearly wasn't my bulbous ass in the window. Eventually another kid broke down and told on the bad kid.

 

[ElectricLightKazooII]

Eventually another kid broke down and told on the bad kid.

That kids name? Patrick Tomlinson.

 

[Smeckler's Powder]

unrelated to his nicotine fix.

That's what's up