Rick continues to try and drum up some interest in his dumb Christmas book

[NoBacon]

I do occasionally browse my local bookstores like a hipster and pick up some random stuff that catches my eye, I can’t even begin to describe how viscerally repulsed I’d be to find something called “A CHRISTMAS CARNAGE” that was about tiny Tim being some kind of Victorian John wick.

Who the FUCK does this appeal to?

 

[NoBacon]

View attachment 22541

Just give it up, stupid, this will sell double digit copies at best.

I’m a shitty writer myself but why would it actually matter if the third person narrator used a term that the first person characters wouldn’t use themselves? They aren’t saying it, the external narrator is and they aren’t bound by the language restrictions of the period…

 

[MonsterSteve]

That is an awful piece of writing. Kill yourself.

 

['THE NIGGER MAN']

Why shoot for historical accuracy? The concept is so dumb and childish, the only way to do it is so tongue-in-cheek that you just say fuck it and be silly about it. Instead, this fucking mutant is looking up what figures of speech are period appropriate, as if that's the thing that's going to shatter the reader's suspension of disbelief and not the fact that every character talks exactly the same.

Wouldn't be a Christmas story without Chris Cringe-l.

Pre-nominated for the Bocchetti Shitted-Pants Literary Award.

 

['THE NIGGER MAN']

I'm sure all this research will make this accurate and not at all like he is listing worthless details he looked up on google.

What else is supposed to happen under a fart blanket with literally zero effort?

I mean, 1863 is so long ago, no firsthand information of daily life survived.

 

[42069]

That third paragraph might have been the worst thing ever written

 

[EraGodless]

No, child, it is not. Neither is the 4th.

I didn’t make it that far.

 

[guest]

That third paragraph might have been the worst thing ever written

It's like he just took the next sentence that was coming and indented it. There was no need to make a new paragraph there. Jesus Christ he's a fucking horrible author.

 

[IGotATreeOnMyHouse85]

It was pointed out earlier how the name “Christmas Carnage” sounds like an early 90s WCW pay per view. Pat might as well call this turd “Seasons Beatings”

 

[Patrick O'Neal]

I’m a shitty writer myself but why would it actually matter if the third person narrator used a term that the first person characters wouldn’t use themselves? They aren’t saying it, the external narrator is and they aren’t bound by the language restrictions of the period…

You don't understand.

He thinks he is Dickens.

 

[RoTheHo69]

Big surprise that this fat fucking pig is incorrect about something.

"you can't take it with you
It’s of temporal value; you may as well enjoy it now. This phrase dates from the early nineteenth century. Frederick Marryat used it in Masterman Ready (1841): “He was very fond of money; but that they said was all the better, as he could not take it away with him when he died.” The expression gained even wider currency when George Kaufman and Moss Hart used it as the title for one of their great comedies (1937)."

you can't take it with you

Definition of you can't take it with you in the Idioms Dictionary by The Free Dictionary

idioms.thefreedictionary.com

 

[guest]

It was pointed out earlier how the name “Christmas Carnage” sounds like an early 90s WCW pay per view. Pat might as well call this turd “Seasons Beatings”

I can't wait for the second book in Patrick's Tiny Tim revenge trilogy: Halloween Havoc.
[MEDIA=youtube]krudzxbcwq0[/MEDIA]

 

[JoeBrotheChildSpitGuzzler]

It was pointed out earlier how the name “Christmas Carnage” sounds like an early 90s WCW pay per view. Pat might as well call this turd “Seasons Beatings”

He's an even stupider, more hacky Vince Russo

 

[Ramooooonnnneeeeee]

I think Rick should focus more on a Saving Private Ryan type idea...... only in space.

 

[NoBacon]

You don't understand.

He thinks he is Dickens.

I actually think that excerpt he posted was the best thing he’s written that I’ve seen. It’s still not good, obviously. He isn’t a good writer. He’s a hobbyist.

Even if you forget the actual content and the tendency to just write tedious huge dialogue every page, it’s just not written well. Bad syntax, bad grammar - doesn’t structure anything properly. I do think the concept of getting a formal education for an art is stupid but they do actually teach you how to actually write.

 

[AntSucks]

He spells "honor" with the American-English spelling. Nice research, dumbarse.

 

[Random username]

Either this garbage gets self published or it's going to sit in a slush pile never to be read by anyone higher then an intern.

2 other points
Pat is a faggot
Niggers ruin everything.

 

[TomFromNawlins]

I actually think that excerpt he posted was the best thing he’s written that I’ve seen. It’s still not good, obviously. He isn’t a good writer. He’s a hobbyist.

Even if you forget the actual content and the tendency to just write tedious huge dialogue every page, it’s just not written well. Bad syntax, bad grammar - doesn’t structure anything properly. I do think the concept of getting a formal education for an art is stupid but they do actually teach you how to actually write.

The formal education in the art form isn’t that stupid of a concept. It may prevent people from being a worthless dilettante. The really stupid part is going into massive debt for it.

 

[RobertMewler]

You don't understand.

He thinks he is Dickens.

Dickens Cide Mewler

 

[Safka's Enticer]

Big surprise that this fat fucking pig is incorrect about something.

"you can't take it with you
It’s of temporal value; you may as well enjoy it now. This phrase dates from the early nineteenth century. Frederick Marryat used it in Masterman Ready (1841): “He was very fond of money; but that they said was all the better, as he could not take it away with him when he died.” The expression gained even wider currency when George Kaufman and Moss Hart used it as the title for one of their great comedies (1937)."

you can't take it with you

Definition of you can't take it with you in the Idioms Dictionary by The Free Dictionary

idioms.thefreedictionary.com

I bet we can find this line in Dickens actual novels