Patposter Census: Religious Affiliation Survey

[Safka's Enticer]

I believe in Mel and Norm. Everyone else is a fag.

Even Jesus and Muhammad?

 

[eggfeller]

Is there a religion based on absolute hatred of your central figure?

there is now!

 

[YourOldPalHoward]

Pleasantly surprised by the high Catholic representation here. Considering we’re also a supermajority on the Supreme Court, I’m starting to wonder if that cyberstalking ruling might have come down to a few secret brothermen on the bench.

I could see Kavanaugh being a patposter.

 

[YourOldPalHoward]

To our agnostic rascals, what would it take to convince you that Jesus Christ is lord and the Roman Catholic Church is His mystical body on earth?

 

[Consensual Rapist]

This is for my favorite homosexual lover, @NoBacon

 

[Guest]

No option for Jewish?

They don't even count as people. So no.

 

[Guest]

To our agnostic rascals, what would it take to convince you that Jesus Christ is lord and the Roman Catholic Church is His mystical body on earth?

he needs to get his ass down here and shake my hand. Maybe let me borrow $20

 

[ViVillHaVin!]

state religion protestantism

 

[guest]

This gave me a chuckle

 

[NoBacon]

Depressing amount of faggot agnostics and atheists.

Probably think they’re smarty pants who don’t fall for religious dogma etc etc etc, all the usual retard stuff.

 

[Jenna]

Most hyper-religious types (like NoBacon) don't even follow the religion. They just have their individual beliefs and go "this is Christianity."

You can't pick and choose which aspects of Christianity to follow, then add on your little corrections to the bible. Yes to hating gays, no to avoiding shellfish or premarital sex. The Bible forbids you from getting haircuts or shaving, but yeah let's ignore that one.

Then the additions. Jesus wants me to hate gays, but also blacks, latinos, asians, arabs, Jews. Jesus only loves straight white males. That's not Christianity, that's 4chan Christianity. That's heresy, plain and simple. I'd much rather be comfortable admitting my belief system doesn't follow any organized religion than spread a heretical rewrite of Christianity that's 99.9% focused on spreading hate and vile towards others.

 

[Jims_Maroon_Pants]

Welcome to the Patposter Census! This survey is aimed at gaining a better understanding of the religious diversity within our vibrant patposting community. While the survey is for information gathering purposes only, feel free to use this thread to engage in discussions and dialogue and about religious and philosophical matters.

Participation is entirely voluntary and confidentiality is paramount. The data gathered will only serve to paint a broader picture of our community's diversity.

Note: The decision to exclude Judaism from the list was made to prevent potential misuse and the skewing of results due to joke entries. If you are Jewish and would like to be counted in the poll, post a verification photo of yourself wearing a yama-what's-it and striking a distinctly Jewish pose.

Is a hand rubbing pose acceptable?

 

[Jims_Maroon_Pants]

Agnostic, but I may throw in with the orthodox just because their seriousness appeals to me.

We welcome all people's, funster.
Also we are serious but also love to celebrate and the one true God doesn't frown on a few drinks

 

[NoBacon]

Most hyper-religious types (like NoBacon) don't even follow the religion. They just have their individual beliefs and go "this is Christianity."

You can't pick and choose which aspects of Christianity to follow, then add on your little corrections to the bible. Yes to hating gays, no to avoiding shellfish or premarital sex. The Bible forbids you from getting haircuts or shaving, but yeah let's ignore that one.

Then the additions. Jesus wants me to hate gays, but also blacks, latinos, asians, arabs, Jews. Jesus only loves straight white males. That's not Christianity, that's 4chan Christianity. That's heresy, plain and simple. I'd much rather be comfortable admitting my belief system doesn't follow any organized religion than spread a heretical rewrite of Christianity that's 99.9% focused on spreading hate and vile towards others.

Shut up you fat retard Jew

 

[Jims_Maroon_Pants]

To our agnostic rascals, what would it take to convince you that Jesus Christ is lord and the Roman Catholic Church is His mystical body on earth?

Roman Catholics are heathens and the path to God is thru Constantinople and orthodoxy

 

[Jenna]

Shut up you fat retard Jew

I mean you are a heretic, it's okay they don't execute heretics anymore, at least in most countries. You might as well be saying "God loves the Dallas Cowboys!"

You don't attend church, you pick and choose bible verses based on what 4chan posts, and you weaponize Christianity to defend whatever insane thought enters your head.

That isn't heresy how? Lemme guess, more ignoring what I'm saying to make ad hominem attacks.

 

[YourOldPalHoward]

Most hyper-religious types (like NoBacon) don't even follow the religion. They just have their individual beliefs and go "this is Christianity."

You can't pick and choose which aspects of Christianity to follow, then add on your little corrections to the bible. Yes to hating gays, no to avoiding shellfish or premarital sex. The Bible forbids you from getting haircuts or shaving, but yeah let's ignore that one.

Then the additions. Jesus wants me to hate gays, but also blacks, latinos, asians, arabs, Jews. Jesus only loves straight white males. That's not Christianity, that's 4chan Christianity. That's heresy, plain and simple. I'd much rather be comfortable admitting my belief system doesn't follow any organized religion than spread a heretical rewrite of Christianity that's 99.9% focused on spreading hate and vile towards others.

This is why Catholics reject scripture as a sole arbiter of theological truth and instead humbly defer to the wisdom and interpretations of sacred tradition, Thomas Aquinas, and the infallible magisterium of our holy mother church.

 

[Eugene]

Please sir add a second better option for Hindus. I do not wish to associate with the lower castes (internet moderators)

 

[NoBacon]

I mean you are a heretic, it's okay they don't execute heretics anymore, at least in most countries. You might as well be saying "God loves the Dallas Cowboys!"

You don't attend church, you pick and choose bible verses based on what 4chan posts, and you weaponize Christianity to defend whatever insane thought enters your head.

That isn't heresy how? Lemme guess, more ignoring what I'm saying to make ad hominem attacks.

You’re fat and retarded, it’s not hateful to be honest.

Nice try with the hate though, have a good one

 

[Oogie Farts 1488]

there's only one right answer