I woke up hard as fuck.

[BoringFaggot]

Just sayin...

 

[DMbA]

187 on a mother effing cop

 

[TravisPickle]

Waking up with a powerful boner is nice, but its quite deflating when you realize it was just because you're aging bladder needed to be relieved.

 

[aRTie02150]

Waking up with a powerful boner is nice, but its quite deflating when you realize it was just because you're aging bladder needed to be relieved.

I always enjoy pissing with a boner and watching it go flaccid as it flows.

 

[TravisPickle]

I always enjoy pissing with a boner and watching it go flaccid as it flows.

Younger me used to have to do some pretty crazy arc-jobs before pissing on the ceiling. Back when I was young enough that the morning wood would not go away for the longest time. I guess I coulda just pissed in the shower like Costanza.

 

[BoringFaggot]

Younger me used to have to do some pretty crazy arc-jobs before pissing on the ceiling. Back when I was young enough that the morning wood would not go away for the longest time. I guess I coulda just pissed in the shower like Costanza.

I squat and tuck..

 

[TravisPickle]

I squat and tuck..

My dick is fucking annoying, its one of those boners that has an upward curve, the squat and tuck is way too hard to pull off. Banana dick.

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

I squat and tuck..

I tried doing a handstand the other day to piss but I fell over.

 

[TravisPickle]

Lets be real, plantain dick.

 

[ミスタースパーコル]

Banana dick.

Ever thought about sodomizing The Amazing Atheist?

 

[TravisPickle]

Ever thought about sodomizing The Amazing Atheist?

As long as he brings the candles.

 

[fusciasomething]

What happened to this place? Some retarded fap guy lusting after a woman who literally looks like a horse, Sue writing pages of demented text on literally every subject and this Patreeky level trash. Not to steal no name John's bit but fuck this forum lately

 

[TravisPickle]

What happened to this place? Some retarded fap guy lusting after a woman who literally looks like a horse, Sue writing pages of demented text on literally every subject and this Patreeky level trash. Not to steal no name John's bit but fuck this forum lately

Based and accurate comment.

 

[ミスタースパーコル]

Some retarded fap guy lusting after a woman who literally looks like a horse

???

 

[BoringFaggot]

What happened to this place? Some retarded fap guy lusting after a woman who literally looks like a horse, Sue writing pages of demented text on literally every subject and this Patreeky level trash. Not to steal no name John's bit but fuck this forum lately

Maybe I should have mentioned farting in Niki's vagina, would that have helped?

 

[Phish]

Anyone else stick it in their wife/GF while theyre asleep when you wake up w raging morning wood? I dont need the bitch to be awake. I just need a hole to stick it in before i go to work.

 

[TravisPickle]

???

Probably me talking about wanting to watch Norma drool on a dildo. I'm somewhat of a horsefucker aficionado. Fat bitches and horse bitches, baby.

 

[LaylaCumiasMoistHotPocket]

Have you ever filled the toilet with the whole roll and shit on the very top, leaving it for the cunt cleaner, and if no ones around you jump in the next cubicle to clean your ass, so if the cleaner walks in to clean it, he doesnt think it was you, because you’re in a different cubicle?

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

I always enjoy pissing with a boner and watching it go flaccid as it flows.

Had a piss boner this morning. Wanted to sleep longer but the bladder wasnt having it and I couldnt get back to sleep after the piss. Had to do that weird lean angle half asleep.

 

[Dog Eater]

Have you ever filled the toilet with the whole roll and shit on the very top, leaving it for the cunt cleaner, and if no ones around you jump in the next cubicle to clean your ass, so if the cleaner walks in to clean it, he doesnt think it was you, because you’re in a different cubicle?

No but at a work I’m very considerate and always use the toilet brush, unless the Indian cleaner is in, in which case fuck him clean my shit.