WWAW jerking off on your wife/SO while they sleep

[Former Prez Gerald Ford]

I feel like this is something Ted Bundy would do but fuck it. I really don’t look at porn much anymore and my wife has been on her period for nearly a week. I was half cocked and needed a release the other night. My wife has a phenomenal dumper so I pulled down her panties a bit so her ass was hanging out and rubbed my dick all up her crack while I spanked it. It was hot as fuck. I dropped a pretty big load on her ass cheek and then started wiping it up with a t shirt. She’s usually a deep sleeper but I must have woken her up. She said what are you doing and looked over her shoulder at me with my cock in my hand and what I’m sure was a shit eating grin on my face. She gave me a very annoyed look and went back to sleep. Then I went downstairs and made some nachos and had another beer.

perfect night!

 

[ShutYourCakeHorn]

You have to mark you territory bro, good job!

 

[Former Prez Gerald Ford]

View attachment 31766

I don’t know if I’d be able to keep that little penis out of my mouth

 

[guest]

making marital rape illegal was NOT PFG, pre 1994 you couldve just covered her mouth and rammed it in her

 

[Former Prez Gerald Ford]

making marital rape illegal was NOT PFG, pre 1994 you couldve just covered her mouth and rammed it in her

It’s called “wifely duties” for a reason. Would you tell an employer “no I’m not doing my job today because I just don’t feel like it?” Doesn’t work like that little baby honey child. Hush now here comes da pre

 

[MunchausenByProxy]

The Virgin porn watcher vs The Chad asscheek bandit

 

[DiarrheaDick]

Right in the puddin'

 

[Torque’sHeadBump]

Fawk I need to try that. My girl works nights so she sometimes needs to sleep at odd hours. Usually I’m pretty frothed up and it sucks to lay there with a rod. Next time I’m just gonna get the poison out onto her ass. She won’t mind.

 

[Zombie247]

"Then I went downstairs and made some nachos and had another beer."

I love happy endings.

 

[guest]

Personally I think you're a sick maniac but I admire your shameless degeneracy Sir.

 

[Mc.Faggot]

That is borderline romantic

I think a girl would prefer that to you jacking to porn

edit: also let’s see your wife’s fat ass

I enjoy cumming too

 

[Former Prez Gerald Ford]

Personally I think you're a sick maniac but I admire your shameless degeneracy Sir.

How do you guys fuck your wives over there in bongland? Do you have to shear them first in order to find the pussy or do you just poke your dick around her hindquarters until she goes BAAAA AAAAHH

 

[guest]

How do you guys fuck your wives over there in bongland? Do you have to shear them first in order to find the pussy or do you just poke your dick around her hindquarters until she goes BAAAA AAAAHH

Well, when they're awake for starters.

 

[Torque’sHeadBump]

How do you guys fuck your wives over there in bongland? Do you have to shear them first in order to find the pussy or do you just poke your dick around her hindquarters until she goes BAAAA AAAAHH

Oi imagine it’s somefing loike this bruv

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

Hey, not to sound like a pussy here, fellas, but you should probably clear that with the gals you're jacking off onto first.

Chances are, if you're married she's not gonna care, but in the off chance it does bother her, that's something that could come up in divorce proceedings that doesn't make you look great. Sometimes, there's things that you can suggest and they'll be like "yeah, that sounds hot" but if you just go for, it'll freak them out and maybe make them see you in a whole new light.

 

[Torque’sHeadBump]

Hey, not to sound like a pussy here, fellas, but you should probably clear that with the gals you're jacking off onto first.

Chances are, if you're married she's not gonna care, but in the off chance it does bother her, that's something that could come up in divorce proceedings that doesn't make you look great. Sometimes, there's things that you can suggest and they'll be like "yeah, that sounds hot" but if you just go for, it'll freak them out and maybe make them see you in a whole new light.

Fawk Abe once again with the wyzzdom

Nice avatar btw

 

[Mc.Faggot]

Hey, not to sound like a pussy here, fellas, but you should probably clear that with the gals you're jacking off onto first.

Chances are, if you're married she's not gonna care, but in the off chance it does bother her, that's something that could come up in divorce proceedings that doesn't make you look great. Sometimes, there's things that you can suggest and they'll be like "yeah, that sounds hot" but if you just go for, it'll freak them out and maybe make them see you in a whole new light.

Finally, some actual good dad advice from you

Usually when I ask you for life advice you just make me re-watch a movie of yours or an interview. Then you just turn to me and go “any questions”

And if I ever have a question, you just sigh and put in another VHS

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

That is borderline romantic

I think a girl would prefer that to you jacking to porn

edit: also let’s see your wife’s fat ass

I enjoy cumming too

Every woman I've ever been with has eventually caught me beating off to porn on the couch instead of just fucking them. Because sometimes I just want to cum and don't feel like putting in like half an hour of physical labour.

 

[JoeCumiaDotCom]

Hey, not to sound like a pussy here, fellas, but you should probably clear that with the gals you're jacking off onto first.

Chances are, if you're married she's not gonna care, but in the off chance it does bother her, that's something that could come up in divorce proceedings that doesn't make you look great. Sometimes, there's things that you can suggest and they'll be like "yeah, that sounds hot" but if you just go for, it'll freak them out and maybe make them see you in a whole new light.

Oh c'mon, Vigoda. Like you never jacked it on a broad while she slept without askin.

 

[Mc.Faggot]

Every woman I've ever been with has eventually caught me beating off to porn on the couch instead of just fucking them. Because sometimes I just want to cum and don't feel like putting in like half an hour of physical labour.

every serious gf ive had tells me “just have sex with me when your horny even if im asleep”

which really means, if you wake me up jacking off, then fuck me, unless im actually tired, then im gonna go “Baaaabe i gotta work in the morning”

chicks are goofy