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What's the worst job you ever had?

LockedHDD__Pot

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38,649
When I was 14 (pretending to be older) I did a few days cold-calling & selling Wills (last willing testament) - the most common response was "wheels? I don't even have a car". It was in a mobile-home type unit on an industrial estate, I only did about 3 or 4 days there & half the time it was just me & some old guy overseeing it (why didn't he just make the calls himself?) - kinda weird.

I soon left & sold the number-list to a double glazing company next door.

I can kinda remember 1st part of the script: Hi, good afternoon, I'm Mark(real name redacted) & I'm calling on behalf of Just WIlls... that's generally as far as it got
 
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EraGodless

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51,196
Killed geese for a few days once. Well, I caught them but at fourteen I wasn't hard enough to cut their heads off. It was for Christmas so we ran out of work pretty quick. Cold-calling sucks, I've done a lot of grueling work but the worst has to be laborer for a general contractor. Either you're doing fucking nothing all day or you're cleaning up after the Indian drywall crews who pretend they don't speak English. Or dragging propane tanks around for heaters. Or moving something today so you can move it again tomorrow and so forth.

I'd rather break rocks.
This guy general contracts. Holy shit was my boss a retard (he was a medical doctor and not practicing at the time). You are not kidding about moving shit one day, only to move it back the next day. And the guy I worked with always tried to get cute and Jewy with my pay.
 
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EraGodless

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51,196
First job was janitor at my high school. Didn't want to do it, but looking back, great gig.

Next job was at the pepper/onion processing plant that sent them across the river to Ore-Ida to turn into the shit you buy at stores. I was in peppers and there were two positions they switched you back and forth from. One was standing on either side of the conveyer belt as peppers got dumped on it and you would grab them and smash out the core on this steel rod and throw them down a shoot. They got chopped up and spat out onto another conveyer belt where depending on which side you were standing on, picked out the bad bits and threw them to the trash half or the good ones and vice versa. So much gross shit never got pulled out of the supposed good side of the belt. Knowing what I do now about how shit our food supply is, they must have been dying them green/red either there or at Ore-Ida so they probably didn't need to give a shit that "quality control" was seriously lacking. I'm talking like full on rotten peppers making it all the way through, and shitloads of them. Holy fuck did time move slow at this job. Conveniently, the bitches slicing onions were positioned below the pepper line, so it was great having that shit burning your nose/eyes all day. Occasionally there was an ammonia leak. I'd try to sing songs in my head the whole time to try to make the time go faster, and I'd get through the entirety of "Stairway to Heaven" only to look at the clock and have it be 5 minutes earlier than when I started the song. Fucking hell that shit sucked.

Next job was getting hired at this farm to do various things. I don't know if I made it a whole week before the guy was like "yeah maybe this isn't for you." It probably would have been an okay gig in a lot of ways but siphon tubes are heavy as shit and if you've ever tried to set them you know that you can get all the way across the field before realizing you did them all crooked and if you tried to turn them on they would separate and shit. I had already applied at the Wal Mart and they called to hire me so we amicably parted ways.

Wal-Mart hired me to push carts, because evidently, the assumed I was retarded or something because when I was filling out the application at the machine in the store, thinking I'd be able to go back and edit it it before submitting it, I put in a bunch of gibberish for references and stuff. So they called my house and my mom answered and gave them all the info lol. So I got hired to work with a cart pushing crew that was 90% mild to heavy retarded dudes 9% felon goofballs who were 19 with 19 kids and myself. It was actually not that bad a gig. Lots of freedom and goof off time that I don't know if I appreciated properly at the time. When I decided to move to Las Vegas they transferred me to a location here where I started spending the mornings hanging in the car listening to Carolla which turned into getting exposed to Owen A. The other dudes working the Vegas location were different than the ones back home, not entirely retards, dudes slinging weed/ecstacy/blow in the parking lot type of shit. Had some funny run ins with Jimmy "Dynomite" JJ Walker who used to come in there to try and bang one of the CSMs.

Worked at a survey call center for a short amount of time. Awful. Fucking really bad.

Working at Red Robin started out shitty since they hired me as a host and kept dangling "we'll make you a server" in front of me forever. One bad scenario after the next and I'm living in my car, sleeping in the parking lot. When I finally got them to make me a server all a sudden I was making great money and the bartender was getting me wasted. Worked out great for awhile, then they closed our store and sent us to other locations which were shitty and made me less money. I didn't care much that it sucked shit because I had a lot of other shit going on outside of that job playing music and such and my rent was not that expensive. Eventually when music world/getting loads of poontang/doing loads of great drugs went into a lull I started hating that job more and with jobs like that there's usually a lot of turnover in management and when you get a niggercunt that hates you, it becomes an awful environment. I started stealing as much shit as I could from the place and causing just general chaos around the place. They didn't have anything specific to fire me for so like someone else had said earlier I was fired for my "values no longer aligning with those of Red Robin" and shit. I later went back in to bring another ex employee some shrooms and caused quite a disturbance while wasted and on mushrooms/some mystery pill. Walked in the side door and right up to a family eating dinner and grabbed the dads glass announcing to the whole restaurant "anybody wanna see something funny?!?" and smashing the glass on the ground. Licked a girls face, yadda yadda.

So glad I didn't get involved in any pyramid schemes. I had two different people try to recruit me really hard while I was at that first Red Robin. The first was this chick who had eaten there and she starts talking to me on her way out and gets my number and shit. I think I'm gonna fuck this chick. Nope, she's working at some bullshit place trying to get me to join. lol. Next dude I thought just wanted to hang out and he had a hot bitch with him so I figured I'd go hang out with the dude. We went to the Plaza hotel and ate dinner(which was good) while they tried to convince me to join whatever their bullshit was. Dude was giving me the hardest fucking sell ever. I was like no way and didn't hear from the guy again. About a year later I'm in a Wal Mart in another part of town entirely and I hear a familiar voice loudly yelling "we're clapping in unison!" or some such nonsense and I turn and look and it's that same dude that tried to recruit me for the pyramid thing, wearing a Wal Mart uniform and trying to hi-five his co-worker. Felt like some full circle type shit.
You should cut and paste this later- I think new posts are only temporary. This is a great story. I wanna party with you, cowboy!
 

HotDogJoe

Professional leech since 1994. Anyone can do it.
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79,981
Wearing giant "VETERAN" hats just so you know they are special and you are not.

joe.png
 
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This guy general contracts. Holy shit was my boss a retard (he was a medical doctor and not practicing at the time). You are not kidding about moving shit one day, only to move it back the next day. And the guy I worked with always tried to get cute and Jewy with my pay.
Yeah, I mean I don't mind hard work but when it's just pointless bullshit it wears on a nigga. Luckily I had no problems with pay but everything else was just a nightmare. Now I work inside, not breaking my back or anything just putting good work in. Much better.
 

Smeckler's Powder

Sweet powder eases the pain
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18,243
You should cut and paste this later- I think new posts are only temporary. This is a great story. I wanna party with you, cowboy!

Let's do it brotherman.

I forgot about helping frame a house. Nothing much of note other than it sucks moving boards back and forth and having dipshits talk down to you because you're not the one holding a drill or fucking up the blue prints. I suppose it was a good workout but holy shit exhausting. Especially when the house is being built at the top of a hill lol
 
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Guest
When I was in college, I worked at a scam call center that would sign up people for a "service" that provided listings of foreclosed and rent-to-own homes and repossessed vehicles. This is information you can get for free from the courthouse, but the target demo would be people dumb and desperate enough to pay for it. During the course of the call, you'd get them to agree to sign up for a "free 7 day trial" with a $1.95 "activation fee." If they didn't cancel before the 7 days are up, they were charged $20, plus whatever additional bullshit services you'd get them to agree to sign up for. The script was designed to flow so that you'd get them to agree to sign up for shit without them even realizing it, sometimes totalling up to 80 bucks of monthly charges until they cancelled. These people definitely couldn't afford that. The management would tell us to ask them what kind of house they wanted for what price. No matter what they said, if they said they wanted a 4 bedroom house for 10 bucks a month, you were supposed to mash the keyboard to make noise and say "Ok...I'm seeing [made up number] homes in your area. We can help you get into one of those homes." It was real scummy.

The people that worked there were a trip; truly a bizarre cross-section of humanity. You'd have gang members with teardrop tattoos, old ladies, homeless people, ex-cons, foreigners that spoke no English, white guys with cornrows, occultist weirdos (name more examples). One supervisor would be a Carribean black guy, the next would be a skinhead with swastika tattoos on his elbows. There was an old hippie lady that would tell me stories like about she was on LSD at a music festival in the 60's when the cops came and started calling her name on a megaphone. It turned out that her father died and they told her while she was peaking on acid. She also asked me if I ever read The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion. People like that.

The first day I sat next to a Mexican that had a little black box next to him. He was showing me the ropes and every now and then, the box would beep and he'd have to press a button. It turned out he was on parole for weapons charges and that was a GPS unit that checked his location since he was only allowed to go to work and the grocery store. He would also tell me about his scam of trading food stamps for cash and about a time he got into a fight in prison where he ripped a guy's cheeks open with his fingers. Eventually he violated his parole and was sent back.

I made friends with an old ex-con that looked like Cliff Claven from Cheers. He did a 10 year bid for getting caught with 100 lbs of marijuana. I asked him about life in the joint. He said the Aryan gangs tried to recruit him but he told them "No way. I'm the shot caller of the OMG: the one man gang." If you're an unaffiliated white, you go in a group called the Woodpile, but I'm sure enough people have heard about that. I'd give him rides to the Salvation Army where he lived and he'd help me buy beer. One time after getting some Miller High Life, he grabbed a couple bags of ice we didn't pay for. I cracked a joke: "Man, you're a real hustler, huh?" He said "I'm not a hustler, [my name], I'm a survivor." He ended up moving into a shack in the Mexican's backyard and last I heard he had gotten an apartment and a girlfriend and was driving a cab. Pretty inspirational in a weird way. Guy really was a survivor.

Eventually, credit card companies blacklisted the call center. Then our paychecks started bouncing. You could only cash them as ghetto gas stations. Then one day the doors were locked. The guy that ran the operation was a real piece of garbage (whose name sounded fake so I'm thinking he was a crypto, although I have no proof). He would run companies like this in other states, let them run their course, and either sell them or just shut them down. He got fined by the FTC but it was a drop in the bucket for him. Apparently when some workers confronted him at his mansion to get paid, he invited them in and was talking a mile a minute because he was tweaking so hard. As far as I know, he never faced any criminal charges. It was a shit job, but a very interesting experience for sure.
 
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Smeckler's Powder

Sweet powder eases the pain
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18,243
I did commercial carpet, tile, sheet vinyl, etc in Manhattan. I fucking hated it. I lasted a lil over 3 years. Idk how my dad and grandfather did it for 35-40 years apiece. Don’t do flooring. Just do some other building trade.

I've done my own floors, some vinyl/wood stuff. I don't hate it too bad, why did you hate it so much? Carrying heavy flooring boxes up into city of Manhatten bullshit?
 
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I've done my own floors, some vinyl/wood stuff. I don't hate it too bad, why did you hate it so much? Carrying heavy flooring boxes up into city of Manhatten bullshit?
Nah the work itself was fine enough. But having it as your every day job at like 20 floor office builds, nah don’t do it. Crawling around on your knees for 7 hours a day is brutal on the body. It ruins your back and knees pretty damn quick. My old man’s back is completely shot from it. I also worked for the biggest shop in the union and it was just constant pressure and cut throat bullshit. Always in fear of your job over any little thing.

Now I work in the subway tunnels, can sleep half my shift, and can’t get fired. Life’s wayyyyy better
 
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