What is the most blatantly false story from The Opester?

Antsballwasher

asshole
That blonde aspy fruit lied about pretty much everything, he grew up solidly middle class like all of centerport and never had to “go hungry”, his childhood was like the opening scene from caddyshack.
He made up all those poor stories to ingratiate himself with the weeerking class audience of wbab and waaf, a total phony.
Truth is the reason opie came off as “boring” and naht funny is because he literally never lived life, he went from highschool to a college frat to being a nighttime jockey while never leaving long island.
He doesn’t have any working class stories or wild experiences which is why he makes up shit like caddying for the mob or picking up marshmallows with his asshole.
He’s just a fucking dud that got lucky he tripped a gig paired with the funniest , quickest man in radio and possibly comedic his-tory.
 
He’s just a fucking dud that got lucky he tripped a gig paired with the funniest , quickest man in radio and possibly comedic his-tory.

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He could have made the NBA if he was only a bit taller... he "shot the lights out" like Pete Marevich.

Yup, he also could've been a model, but instead of the NBA or a modeling career, he chose a WBAB, a local Long Island rock station, working part time. I'm sure marshmallows in your buttcheeks is legit. That's what frats do. Cutesy tame stuff.


He also won't have a problem being successful on his own.
 

Chapel

Dirty Bastard
Yup, he also could've been a model, but instead of the NBA or a modeling career, he chose a WBAB, a local Long Island rock station, working part time. I'm sure marshmallows in your buttcheeks is legit. That's what frats do. Cutesy tame stuff.


He also won't have a problem being successful on his own.
You’ll be saying he didn’t rollerblade or skate to work next
 

The Talking Dead

I'm close to death! Hahahaha hooooooly shit!!
Yup, he also could've been a model, but instead of the NBA or a modeling career, he chose a WBAB, a local Long Island rock station, working part time. I'm sure marshmallows in your buttcheeks is legit. That's what frats do. Cutesy tame stuff.


He also won't have a problem being successful on his own.

Nobody would've ever heard of you without him. Stew in your bitterness, kike.
 

Antsballwasher

asshole

Can you not read my username?
Nice nigger meme insinuating i'm metaphorically deepthroating tony's italian hog...that's rich coming from the guy with an opie hughes PFP.
you, as a grown man, literally went to google images, and searched "opie hughes"... and thought "This will be a cool avatar for the message board"
...the irony is palpable. Stupid dumb cunt.
 
Can you not read my username?
Nice nigger meme insinuating i'm metaphorically deepthroating tony's italian hog...that's rich coming from the guy with an opie hughes PFP.
you, as a grown man, literally went to google images, and searched "opie hughes"... and thought "This will be a cool avatar for the message board"
...the irony is palpable. Stupid dumb cunt.
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Nice pedophile idol, stupid
 
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