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Well boys, this is it ...

GloryHoleTorqueH

"Now put ice skates on dat bich." Peppermint
Forum Clout
9,598
Thinking it was stress related or something cuz of recent divorce.

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G

Guest

Guest
Last November I went to the doctor with some ass / bowel pains. Thinking it was stress related or something cuz of recent divorce. They kept me for tests and long shory stort it's aggressive and rare colo rectal cancer. Could be from years of smoked meats and road sodas, who knows.

I know I haven't interacted much with the forum lately (we're not that close) but the cancer has apparently spread quite a lot over the last few months, and docs are saying I need to stop work and move into homecare / hospice soon. So soon enough you won't see me no mo.

Just wanted to thank all you retards for the loffs over the years. This place has been a bright spot in what turned out to be a shitty, abusive final 4 years of my life (cue instrumental music).

Let me know if you have any messages for Norm (if I go to heaven) or Ro (you-know-where). Or any tasks I should do with my waning hours.

Patrick Tomlinson is a fat faggot with bitch tits.

Tortfeasor signing out. [BOC][/BOC]
You were told that you’re dying, so you decided to come back here after almost 2 years of not posting just to tell us? Nice depressing bit, stupid.

If I DM you an address will you mail me some of your hardcore pain killers and benzo’s?

Will you sexually harass the black CN’s? After all you’ve been through you deserve some fat black nigger booty.
 

HH Brother

Hotdog skin is coming back in a big fucking way
Forum Clout
49,275
I wouldn’t waste a good opportunity like that without taking a few bad people/musicians/comedians/politicians with me.
I always figured during end of times, I could rent a tri state bus to pick up all the funsters to go murder the Cumias and Nortons while Opie podcasts from the slayings, funster.
 

TheGhostOfAbeVigoda

The War Donkey
Forum Clout
140,910
I know what you're going through. I have real bad sciatica and some days it feels like what I'd imagine asscheek cancer to feel like.

Take it from me, it's very important that you not be buried in a Jewish cemetery. You'll be stuck here forever instead of sucking on a set of big tits in Valhalla. And they'll probably screw you at the Oscar memorial and leave you out in favor of faggot nobodies like Gene Wilder (nice brain, stupid), Alan Rickman (nice pancreas, stupid) and Alexis Arquette (nice AIDS, transtupid).

Anyways, I'm not trying to make your illness all about me. Though it does remind me of Meg Ryan's little dog on the set of Joe VS The Volcano. Tom Hanks was always carrying the dog around and babying it, but me and his stuntman caught him one time between two trailers with the dog. He was crouched down trying to feed it a balled up sandwich wrapper saying "eat it you little faggot." When he noticed us standing there watching him he didn't even stop. Like what he was doing wasn't weird. He was eventually like "little faggot isn't hungry I guess." And then HE shoved the wrapper into his mouth and tried to swallow it but just gagged on it until he threw up. Odd guy. Huge cokehead. Anyways, the dog ended up dying of feline leukemia or some shit.
 
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