The Lizard King checks in

Imagine getting this text then returning it with a serious replying that includes a threat of jail. Pat will overtake Chris Chan in the next couple years. Does Lizard King have a pickle suit in his lair?
Pat billed himself as a working comedian, but he has no grasp of the absurd, of which the Lizard King is a sterling example, or a capstone you might say.
If he didn’t have to obsessively correct the record and flaunt his follower numbers and be an all-around cunt, that “crazy reaction to my Norm tweet” would be a distant memory.
 

TorqueWheeler

Dan doesn't have a penis. I. Do.
Pat billed himself as a working comedian, but he has no grasp of the absurd, of which the Lizard King is a sterling example, or a capstone you might say.
If he didn’t have to obsessively correct the record and flaunt his follower numbers and be an all-around cunt, that “crazy reaction to my Norm tweet” would be a distant memory.
Pat thinks comedy is long-winded, overly wordy garbage about how rich people and/or conservatives are bad. It would be funnier if you got sent an audio file of your mother begging for your help.
 

TorqueWheeler

Dan doesn't have a penis. I. Do.
That stand up Reddit meme with his giant rambling joke about marvel is so fucking bad. I didn’t believe it was real for months, but it is.
I can't remember for sure but I might have been the first person who posted that on the sub when I found it on Imgur. I had to double check it was actually his account because it was so terrible but even the Imgur comments were smashing him and he was, of course, arguing with them.
 
Pat billed himself as a working comedian, but he has no grasp of the absurd, of which the Lizard King is a sterling example, or a capstone you might say.
If he didn’t have to obsessively correct the record and flaunt his follower numbers and be an all-around cunt, that “crazy reaction to my Norm tweet” would be a distant memory.
Exactly. He should've come back as the Lizard Queen to make fun of Lizard Kings micro peen or something to prove he thinks on his feet but he is the most uninteresting, talentless human alive.
 
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