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REMINDER: this is actual dialogue from a Tublinson book he expected people to pay money for

ISO__JOE

ISO__JOE

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“I’m a nurse, Garth Earl. There will be wounded and worse before this night is over. You stay here if you must, but I’m needed.”
Garth gave up. His wife’s mind set like concrete. There’d never been any sense trying to argue with her. “Better go, then.” He gave her an enormous bear hug, then kissed her on the cheek. “Gabby, you keep her safe, ya hear?”
“Will do, cuz. Y’all take care.” Gabby snapped the horse’s reins and the slay slid silently into the night. The last Garth saw of his wife, she was feeding a fresh belt into the 7.62.
“It’s just us now, boy. Best get inside and douse the lights.”
“Yes pop.”
They sat alone in the living room, deathly quiet stretching out between them. Dale finally broke it. “Pop?”
“Yes boy?”
“What’s the meaning of Christmas?”
“What?” Garth perked up at the question. “Don’t be fool, son. It’s about celebrating the birth of our Lord and Savior.”
“I know, it’s just…”
“Just what? Your daddy didn’t raise no mealy-mouth boy. Spit it out.”
“It’s just that Jesus was born in the springtime.”
“He was not! Where’d you hear that heathen ramblin’?”
“I read about it on Wikipedia.”
“Wikiwhatia?”
Click to expand...

www.barnesandnoble.com

Robot Christmas Day 1: "Black Friday" by Patrick Tomlinson - B&N Reads

www.barnesandnoble.com

It really can’t be overstated how awful his writing is.
 
Meownaw

Meownaw

I GOT DA HAT NOW!
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cow_look-removebg-preview (1).png
 
Jims_Maroon_Pants

Jims_Maroon_Pants

Joe's Geek Squad Technician
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How come he's never written about the sacred stone in mecca is just a rock? Or that the Jews pray at the wrong temple wall? It's always shitting on safe Christians with him.
I just read that bio link and I knew it!! I mentioned a few months ago that I realized he owns a triumph because he lives where Harleys are built. Supposedly to piss off the locals. He wants to be an asshole to everyone and anything.
Fuck this guy stinks!
 
DeadWithoutMyDavid

DeadWithoutMyDavid

xe/xim/xey
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CumiaPoodle said:
Garth Earl. Switch the first two letters and it’s earth garl. Garl literally means child. I have to take my meds.

Anyways, that niggas writing is soooo fucking bad I honestly want to know who told him he was good at it. I need to know why he thinks he can write.
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Deep down I doubt he really thinks he's great. It's just another low effort scheme like the standup and the "rant" videos. Fat will plunge down any career path if he believes it's an easy route to fame.

Actually I'm surprised he hasn't launched a podcast yet.
 
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