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Queen Les says you can’t even give away Ricks unreadable dreck

C

CompoundBasement

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Jims_Maroon_Pants said:
I asked this before, has anyone really read his work? I know he's got some real corny and shallow puns like Fonald. But can someone critique his work as far as the plot and story goes? I'm sure it's garbage, but I'd like Owen's take on it.
I'll hang up and listen
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People over at KiwiFarms (tap the sign) have suffered through a couple of his shitty books and posted lengthy reviews of them on his thread over there. Basically, the consensus was his books are "not good".
 
Stent

Stent

cause you know it don't matter anyway
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Jims_Maroon_Pants said:
I asked this before, has anyone really read his work? I know he's got some real corny and shallow puns like Fonald. But can someone critique his work as far as the plot and story goes? I'm sure it's garbage, but I'd like Owen's take on it.
I'll hang up and listen
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I read and reviewed The Ark on the previous forum. His work is worse than you think.
 
Stent

Stent

cause you know it don't matter anyway
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kingship75 said:
Way to walk into another lawsuit, stupid.
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Uh, I meant that it's worse than you think because you never want it to end. Yes, Judge Fudge will accept that reasoning. Maybe if I slide him a 40 and some Popeyes.

Andy's Stark Hairline said:
Were you the guy who went 7 chapters then took a shit on the book?
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Unfortunately not, although I do recall that work of art. I wish I had thought to do it instead of reading the whole thing tabehonestwitcha.
 
RobertMewler

RobertMewler

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Jims_Maroon_Pants said:
I asked this before, has anyone really read his work? I know he's got some real corny and shallow puns like Fonald. But can someone critique his work as far as the plot and story goes? I'm sure it's garbage, but I'd like Owen's take on it.
I'll hang up and listen
Click to expand...
I read 98% of Starship Repo and had to bail. It was a terrible slog and I didn't need to read how it ended, it was so predictable. The worst parts were his additions of contemporary movies, actors, social media, and musicians into the mix. Three examples:

Page 91:

"Aah!" First corrected. "Leave the Skeksis alone. She's not bothering you," First said. Before she'd left PCB, The Dark Crystal and other Jim Henson productions had come back into vogue once the Assembly archive had opened and mankind learned he'd actually been an alien refugee trapped on twentieth-century Earth after a navigation malfunction. He and David Bowie crash-landed on the same ship.

Page 113:

She stared, openmouthed, at the gossamer rings laid out like the ridges of a platinum record glinting in the sun, and on down to the crescent pearl of Mulos Minor at the center. It was breathtaking in every sense of the word.

That'd make one hell of an album cover, First thought.

Something - no, First corrected herself, someone - bumped into her from behind.

"Oh. My. Lords!" The red, segmented being exclaimed at First's face. "Your human cosplay is incredible!"

"Um, thanks?"

"The face, the skin tones, it must have taken forever!"

"About eighteen years, actually," First said. "But my parents helped some."

"Wow! Can I get a selfie?"

I'd prefer if you - "

Flash!

"Right."

"Thank you sooo much," the red alien in the absurdly long Wolverines onesie said as they inch-wormed away. "My followers will love this. You're amazing."

Page 264:

Loritt and the stylist shared a laugh.

"All right, all right. A real Abbot and Costello you two are, " First said. "How will you know what my hair is supposed to look like when you're done?"

"Actually, I've brought samples," Loritt set down his handheld and pressed an icon. Holographic images appeared of Audrey Hepburn, Raquel Welch, Angelina Jolie, and half a dozen other starlets from centuries past that were only now being carried to this part of space by long-forgotten radio waves.


This last one is especially bad. You have a chance to mention starlets from past centuries and only include ones that were famous in your own measly lifetime? AWFUL.
 
DominusOdium

DominusOdium

Well, somebody had to be.
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RobertMewler said:
I read 98% of Starship Repo and had to bail. It was a terrible slog and I didn't need to read how it ended, it was so predictable. The worst parts were his additions of contemporary movies, actors, social media, and musicians into the mix. Three examples:

Page 91:

"Aah!" First corrected. "Leave the Skeksis alone. She's not bothering you," First said. Before she'd left PCB, The Dark Crystal and other Jim Henson productions had come back into vogue once the Assembly archive had opened and mankind learned he'd actually been an alien refugee trapped on twentieth-century Earth after a navigation malfunction. He and David Bowie crash-landed on the same ship.

Page 113:

She stared, openmouthed, at the gossamer rings laid out like the ridges of a platinum record glinting in the sun, and on down to the crescent pearl of Mulos Minor at the center. It was breathtaking in every sense of the word.

That'd make one hell of an album cover, First thought.

Something - no, First corrected herself, someone - bumped into her from behind.

"Oh. My. Lords!" The red, segmented being exclaimed at First's face. "Your human cosplay is incredible!"

"Um, thanks?"

"The face, the skin tones, it must have taken forever!"

"About eighteen years, actually," First said. "But my parents helped some."

"Wow! Can I get a selfie?"

I'd prefer if you - "

Flash!

"Right."

"Thank you sooo much," the red alien in the absurdly long Wolverines onesie said as they inch-wormed away. "My followers will love this. You're amazing."

Page 264:

Loritt and the stylist shared a laugh.

"All right, all right. A real Abbot and Costello you two are, " First said. "How will you know what my hair is supposed to look like when you're done?"

"Actually, I've brought samples," Loritt set down his handheld and pressed an icon. Holographic images appeared of Audrey Hepburn, Raquel Welch, Angelina Jolie, and half a dozen other starlets from centuries past that were only now being carried to this part of space by long-forgotten radio waves.


This last one is especially bad. You have a chance to mention starlets from past centuries and only include ones that were famous in your own measly lifetime? AWFUL.
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This is literary vomit. The equivalent of finding a dried lump of dog shit that resembles a celebrity's profile. Hey look this dog turd looks just like Scorch! It stinks and is revolting but looks like something I recognize so it's good!

He used to like to bring up Douglas Adams while promoting this miserable garbage. Weirdly, I don't recall Adams being full of Family Guy style literary cutaway gags. GET IT? HE'S OBSESSED WITH SOCIAL MEDIA AND PRESENT DAY COMIC BOOKS!

It's the sort of thing people would drag you in the comments of a fan fiction site for doing.
 
JoeCumiawearsDIAPERS

JoeCumiawearsDIAPERS

DMANIAC
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RobertMewler said:
"Actually, I've brought samples," Loritt set down his handheld and pressed an icon. Holographic images appeared of Audrey Hepburn, Raquel Welch, Angelina Jolie, and half a dozen other starlets from centuries past that were only now being carried to this part of space by long-forgotten radio waves.
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Even thousands of years in the future, the virus will spread

:brothaman_md::brothaman_md::brothaman_md:
 
Jims_Maroon_Pants

Jims_Maroon_Pants

Joe's Geek Squad Technician
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65,366
RobertMewler said:
I read 98% of Starship Repo and had to bail. It was a terrible slog and I didn't need to read how it ended, it was so predictable. The worst parts were his additions of contemporary movies, actors, social media, and musicians into the mix. Three examples:

Page 91:

"Aah!" First corrected. "Leave the Skeksis alone. She's not bothering you," First said. Before she'd left PCB, The Dark Crystal and other Jim Henson productions had come back into vogue once the Assembly archive had opened and mankind learned he'd actually been an alien refugee trapped on twentieth-century Earth after a navigation malfunction. He and David Bowie crash-landed on the same ship.

Page 113:

She stared, openmouthed, at the gossamer rings laid out like the ridges of a platinum record glinting in the sun, and on down to the crescent pearl of Mulos Minor at the center. It was breathtaking in every sense of the word.

That'd make one hell of an album cover, First thought.

Something - no, First corrected herself, someone - bumped into her from behind.

"Oh. My. Lords!" The red, segmented being exclaimed at First's face. "Your human cosplay is incredible!"

"Um, thanks?"

"The face, the skin tones, it must have taken forever!"

"About eighteen years, actually," First said. "But my parents helped some."

"Wow! Can I get a selfie?"

I'd prefer if you - "

Flash!

"Right."

"Thank you sooo much," the red alien in the absurdly long Wolverines onesie said as they inch-wormed away. "My followers will love this. You're amazing."

Page 264:

Loritt and the stylist shared a laugh.

"All right, all right. A real Abbot and Costello you two are, " First said. "How will you know what my hair is supposed to look like when you're done?"

"Actually, I've brought samples," Loritt set down his handheld and pressed an icon. Holographic images appeared of Audrey Hepburn, Raquel Welch, Angelina Jolie, and half a dozen other starlets from centuries past that were only now being carried to this part of space by long-forgotten radio waves.


This last one is especially bad. You have a chance to mention starlets from past centuries and only include ones that were famous in your own measly lifetime? AWFUL.
Click to expand...
Holy shit this was so bad, I had a tough time just reading your examples. How did writing like this ever get published?!
 
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