People that constantly dwell on the past. Why?

[NoBacon]

I have family that do this constantly, I mean all the time.

Talking about their childhood and how traumatising it was, what their parents did to them, what happened at school, a boss who laid them off, someone who screwed them out of money.

Whatever the fuck. Just constantly all the time talking about it like it’s some kind of excuse for their shit personality or current circumstances.

It’s what addicts do, but I have to deal with someone in my family who does it 24/7 and I just do not understand it.

We had the same childhood, stupid. I never think about mine and when I do I just think “I’m glad that happened because I learned this from it” sort of thing.

It is a woman, so I know they do that anyway.

Can someone add any useful context or their own stories of dealing with this.

Norton does it with his fucking gay drinking years bullshit.

 

[HR@PaneraBread]

 

[NoBacon]

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[NortheastPhilly]

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Thats when she was still a would

 

[Pat the Simp]

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Fridgebod

 

[CQ Beans]

I have family that do this constantly, I mean all the time.

Talking about their childhood and how traumatising it was, what their parents did to them, what happened at school, a boss who laid them off, someone who screwed them out of money.

Whatever the fuck. Just constantly all the time talking about it like it’s some kind of excuse for their shit personality or current circumstances.

It’s what addicts do, but I have to deal with someone in my family who does it 24/7 and I just do not understand it.

We had the same childhood, stupid. I never think about mine and when I do I just think “I’m glad that happened because I learned this from it” sort of thing.

It is a woman, so I know they do that anyway.

Can someone add any useful context or their own stories of dealing with this.

Norton does it with his fucking gay drinking years bullshit.

I don’t really get this kind of pity me nostalgia. I think of all the times someone said something to me that kinda got my goat. The main thing should have been why did it bother me. Work on what’s important now not the things you can’t help as in the past. All you can do is move forward.

 

[ミスタースパーコル]

I never think about mine and when I do I just think “I’m glad that happened because I learned this from it” sort of thing.

Most people don't actually learn anything from the past.

 

[NoBacon]

Most people don't actually learn anything from the past.

Some people absolutely don’t but I’d like to think in general people realise they can’t keep blaming everything on the past. Fucking let it go.

You can’t alter the past, you don’t know what the future will hold so don’t worry about it, being present and living right is all you can strive to do. I think most people DO realise this, it takes people longer than others though

 

[Phish]

I dont blame doing heroin/fentanyl on my past. I just say im a fuckup and do better for the future. Dwelling on the past is for faggots. We all had a rough time. Get over it. I try to just make sure to not put my kids through the shit that bothered me as a kid, like my parents fighting about shit in front of us, my dad beating the shit out of us (deservedly so), etc. Also this post is so obviously about your batshit sister NoBacon.

 

[chewtoyrapist]

Speaking for myself, I have a lot of intrusive thoughts and it's hard to distract myself with something more productive so I just brood on this or that. It's not even useful as some kind of therapy thing where I'm processing it, it just plays over and over in my head.

When it comes to old people, that's just what they do. It seems like at some point you just have your repertoire of jokes and stories and you stick with them, some start it younger than others.

 

[Turk February]

HARD TIMES
(happiest days of my life)
HARD TIMES GONE BYYYYYYYYYYYY

 

[NoBacon]

Speaking for myself, I have a lot of intrusive thoughts and it's hard to distract myself with something more productive so I just brood on this or that. It's not even useful as some kind of therapy thing where I'm processing it, it just plays over and over in my head.

When it comes to old people, that's just what they do. It seems like at some point you just have your repertoire of jokes and stories and you stick with them, some start it younger than others.

Instead of watching rainbows (high value women) I’m going to make me one (commit a rape of one)

ANYONE CAN DO IT

 

[CQ Beans]

You can’t alter the past, you don’t know what the future will hold

I wish more people thought like this.

 

[Consensual Rapist]

The only thing you should do is look back to the values and practices of the past to find wisdom for living for today.

 

[NoBacon]

The only thing you should do is look back to the values and practices of the past to find wisdom for living for today.

I like to examine the values and practices of the jungle. Live like monkey. Boss monkey.

 

[CQ Beans]

Speaking for myself, I have a lot of intrusive thoughts and it's hard to distract myself with something more productive so I just brood on this or that. It's not even useful as some kind of therapy thing where I'm processing it, it just plays over and over in my head.

When it comes to old people, that's just what they do. It seems like at some point you just have your repertoire of jokes and stories and you stick with them, some start it younger than others.

It takes a lot of proactive deflection to not think that way. You just have to reorient yourself to think positively. I know that reads like textbook talk but it’s the truth. Just try to think ahead in a positive manner.

 

[NoBacon]

It takes a lot of proactive deflection to not think that way. You just have to reorient yourself to think positively. I know that reads like textbook talk but it’s the truth. Just try to think ahead in a positive manner.

It’s not an esoteric spiritual thing, either.

It can be but for me, it’s literally just forcing myself through sheer force of will to stop thinking negatively. “I’m in an unending negative thought loop. FUCKING STOP!” and just force myself to stop doing it like I’m forcing myself to do a workout.

 

[Treat Yourself]

It’s not an esoteric spiritual thing, either.

It can be but for me, it’s literally just forcing myself through sheer force of will to stop thinking negatively. “I’m in an unending negative thought loop. FUCKING STOP!” and just force myself to stop doing it like I’m forcing myself to do a workout.

Call me a fag or whatever but I say the Lord's Prayer to myself and it helps. It doesn't have to be religious, it can be the fucking Litany Against Fear from Dune for all it matters. Reciting a mantra activates a different part of your brain and deactivates the one that's causing all the trouble long enough to get out of the intrusive thoughts loop.

 

[NoBacon]

Call me a fag or whatever but I say the Lord's Prayer to myself and it helps. It doesn't have to be religious, it can be the fucking Litany Against Fear from Dune for all it matters. Reciting a mantra activates a different part of your brain and deactivates the one that's causing all the trouble long enough to get out of the intrusive thoughts loop.

You’re right, prayer works. It 100% does. I don’t do it often enough.

 

[MunchausenByProxy]

Its perfectly normal to have periods of your life where you are hung up on things that happened to you or shitty things you’ve done.
I would even say that if you go through life without ever doing that you’re probably a retard.

You just have to make sure not to make it an excuse to be shitty, like you said.
Unfortunately I think we live in a culture now where a lot of people just surrender to whatever diagnosis they get and dont bother trying to improve. A big thing now is these girls on the internet vlogging about their “day in the life of someone on the spectrum” and they go around showing all the weird shit they do. But you just know that with a little discipline they really wouldnt have to do such weird shit in public and be so needy.