Pat’s Greatest Hits

[Salted Earth Truffle]

I was thinking about how literally everything Pat does makes me cringe. Every second of him staring at his webcam, listening to someone else (for no more than three seconds) is soooo embarrassing. I feel the same way reading anything he has written. I guess I know too much about the guy but I’ve never heard or read anything from him that made me think, “Credit where due, he proved me wrong!”

Can you think of ANYTHING marketable that Pat can do with any competency? The closest I can get is that, if he is to be believed, he helped his father with chores* as a kid. Not exactly a talent or job skill, but I’m being generous here. Other than that, I got bupkes.

*Pat does seem exactly like the kind of obnoxious little shit who follows you around asking so many stupid questions that you eventually give him an assignment just to get away from him. (“Pat, please go rinse off the gravel in the driveway. Yes, all 2,000 feet of it! I don’t care if the hose won’t reach that far — grab a bucket, son.”)

 

[FranksWirecutters]

By chores you mean when he jerked off the horses because his father's ass was too sore?

 

[Oogie Farts 1488]

Pat had enough driving skills to get his drivers license and his motorcycle license.

 

[Suetonius]

He has somehow, somehow, managed to break through into the writing world in the same fantasy people like Ooga live in. They write terrible books and go to cons and had verified twitters so they feel important. He’s managed to not be rejected by that group and the SWFA.

He has gotten TWO WIVES. One makes sense, but the second better wife makes even less sense. But he’s managed to marry twice AND have a kid, even if he doesn’t see it.

Pat probably does have sex. As grotesque as the idea is, it happens, child.

DMCA-ing all the posts on the old sub to the point where brothamen had to start drawing his social media posts to avoid getting the sub shut down.

He has also somehow managed to find a wife and a mother in law who will pay off his debts while he fucks around drunk and building lawn chairs at 2pm.

Patrick W. Tomlinson

 

[Salted Earth Truffle]

Pat had enough driving skills to get his drivers license and his motorcycle license.

Okay so maybe he can get a job as a taxi driver or motorcycle courier? He can’t deliver for any food places because he’d eat all the orders.

 

[guest]

Not joking, not a cheap insult, I was having a horrifying anxious manic episode last night and what calmed me down was at least I'm not pat.

 

[Salted Earth Truffle]

DMCA-ing all the posts on the old sub to the point where brothamen had to start drawing his social media posts to avoid getting the sub shut down.

Fuck this made me laugh so hard. Never heard about this one before! How does this place get funnier every day?

 

[guest]

He can eat almost anything

 

[Faggot Boqposter]

He married a mentally defective woman who gets taken care of by his kindly, well off mother in law. He lives in a house he doesn’t pay for and Niki doesn’t seem to care if Rick ruins their lives and drinks every day.

For a lot of men that would be a pretty sweet situation:

Free house, no work, compliant wife who is too meek and retarded to stop your anti social behavior.

 

[Salted Earth Truffle]

Not joking, not a cheap insult, I was having a horrifying anxious manic episode last night and what calmed me down was at least I'm not pat.

Related: Pat recently came out on top during my own internal game of “Whose life sucks more?” against a personal figure of hate for me. This person has been #1 on my Worst Lives list since 2016. Pat dethroned them as most royally fucked, so I guess that’s a talent?

(They fucked me over in a business deal so I’ve been thrilled to watch them spend the past seven years in legal, financial and personal hell. Their career was on the ascent when they tried to scam me, but they were fired within weeks of my lawsuit being filed and have not worked in their lucrative industry since. Legal bills in the millions. No spouse or family. Reputation so bad nobody wants to associate with them. Meanwhile, many of this person’s arch nemeses have gone on to the highest possible echelons of their field. Some of them have become household names. For seven years, I couldn’t think of anyone whose life is worse than hers. Then came Pat…)

 

[Salted Earth Truffle]

Free house, no work, compliant wife who is too meek and retarded to stop your anti social behavior.

Okay so he’s good at defrauding the mentally ill and just plain stupid. No wonder he went into insurance sales! Maybe he’d make more money scamming a more swarthy market. Maybe he can go into sales for Cricket or MetroPCS.

 

[Suetonius]

Fuck this made me laugh so hard. Never heard about this one before! How does this place get funnier every day?

Going through the archives now trying to find what you quoted about but lol.

 

[guest]

horrifying anxious manic episode

You mean the natural side effects of meth

 

[Salted Earth Truffle]

 

[Mitch Weaver]

Fuck this made me laugh so hard. Never heard about this one before! How does this place get funnier every day?

You should’ve been there. And iirc the faggot still DMCA’d the drawings.

 

[Salted Earth Truffle]

You should’ve been there. And iirc the faggot still DMCA’d the drawings.

I’ve been involved in some legendary days of trolling ROI, but wasn’t around for this, Josiah, him losing his Twitter account the week his book came out and eve of the election. I’ve missed most of his biggest Ls as they unfolded. Those of you who were there to witness these events should never take for granted the gift God granted you.

Also any screenshots would be most welcome.

 

[Suetonius]

I’ve been involved in some legendary days of trolling ROI, but wasn’t around for this, Josiah, him losing his Twitter account the week his book came out and eve of the election. I’ve missed most of his biggest Ls as they unfolded. Those of you who were there to witness these events should never take for granted the gift God granted you.

Also any screenshots would be most welcome.

I had to scroll through hundreds of “FAGGOT” posts for these.

 

[Safka's Enticer]

I love that at least 4 different brothermen dedicated the effort into drawing the same exact Instagram post, and they're all good enough we know exactly what the original is

 

[Pringle Can Lothario]

I still bust ribs at:

- Fatrick's parents blowing their brains out with the "I love my gay son" poster on the wall, and Fatrick naked save for some space socks
- The hundreds of streetshitters wanting to fuck Fatrick's titties on Instagram

 

[Will Tate]

I still bust ribs at:

- Fatrick's parents blowing their brains out with the "I love my gay son" poster on the wall, and Fatrick naked save for some space socks
- The hundreds of streetshitters wanting to fuck Fatrick's titties on Instagram