Pat addresses his fence problem

[BudDickman]

Hola compadres,

My name is Patrick, but you can call me Patricio (only close friends and family can call me Pat).

Several weeks ago I installed my fence in a manner that I saw fit, with the horizontal slats facing out into the housing project next door. But it turns out that this is actually not in compliance with the ridiculous and arbitrary city building codes, so I now have to go through the pointless task of tearing down and reinstalling my fence.

The only reason why this matter was raised in the first place is because fascist cyberstlakers weaponized the city's reporting system and filed a report on false pretenses. This nuance seems to be lost on department officials and on the inspector, who insist that I need to "fix" my fence or face several hundreds of dollars in fines.

As the deadline is fast approaching, I urgently need someone to come "fix" the fence. I would do it myself, but I'm assuming it would be trivial sum to pay someone else to do the job, and I also believe in supporting local Latinx-owned businesses like your own.

I did tell my wife that I would do the work myself because she somehow blames me for this situation. For this reason, I would like the work to be done discreetly during the evening hours, when she is occupied with her SEO client Tyrone and won't notice. I trust that you can accommodate this schedule and hope to hear from you soon.

Salud,
P@tricio

 

[Libby Son Of Loin]

A+ bit. Definitely not a low effort contribution here

 

[BillyCorgan'sFallenTree]

If only Strictly Stalking was still around so I could hear him tell the tale about two uniformed Mexicans showing up to his house with their hands on their rip-cut saws because of a felony request for assistance.

 

[fricklefrackle]

Holy fuck that's good

 

[Brooke Shields]

Just imagine having to reply to this as whatever dumb woman/retard who is in charge of their email, and then Patrick replying in the exact same way making them question what the fuck is going on

 

[Bin_The_Blacks]

This is pretty accurate. He's not doing shit.

 

[AntsBatteryCharge]

 

[Stent]

If only Strictly Stalking was still around so I could hear him tell the tale about two uniformed Mexicans showing up to his house with their hands on their rip-cut saws because of a felony request for assistance.

They're still around, just not on YouTube.

Jaimie's instagram ain't too rough on the old eyes either.

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[Meownaw]

They're still around, just not on YouTube.

Jaimie's instagram ain't too rough on the old eyes either.

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Do you usually rub sandpaper on your eyes or something?

 

[Stent]

Do you usually rub sandpaper on your eyes or something?

Only after seeing Nickocado Avocado's asshole here.

 

[JoeCumiaDotCom]

 

[BudDickman]

I'm doing one of those "bits within a bit" that next level Pat posters do, and this is how he talks to civilians unlucky enough to have to engage with him:

Fucking rude fat faggot with bitch tits. Diana is just trying to do her job.

 

[BudDickman]

By the way, he responded instantaneously. I didn't even have a chance to finish my spiel which I was copy-and-pasting.

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

I'm doing one of those "bits within a bit" that next level Pat posters do, and this is how he talks to civilians unlucky enough to have to engage with him:
View attachment 47712
Fucking rude fat faggot with bitch tits. Diana is just trying to do her job.

Oh he is totally blowing off the inspector and blaming the cyberstlakers on why he did get a permit or hang that fence correctly. I would love to hear him try to explain this to the inspector. I bet he wanted to slap Pat with his clipboard.

 

[Harry Powell]

I'm doing one of those "bits within a bit" that next level Pat posters do, and this is how he talks to civilians unlucky enough to have to engage with him:
View attachment 47712
Fucking rude fat faggot with bitch tits. Diana is just trying to do her job.

Imagine how many civilians he’s spoken to this way. And now that Big Jon is dead there’s no one to keep him in check but us.

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

" You are being catfished by cyberstlakers"

No pat YOU are being catfished by cyberstlakers.

 

[BudDickman]

Imagine how many civilians he’s spoken to this way. And now that Big Jon is dead there’s no one to keep him in check but us.

He has to have that "you have been catfished by cyberstlakers" message locked and loaded at all times because he was lightning fast with it. Like anyone is supposed to even know what that means. Everyone who interacts with him has to hear about cyberstlakers.

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

It must burn pats ass that the inspector is probably telling him " I dont care who reported it, they were right. You didnt get a permit and its installed wrong." Pat thinks if he ignores it, they will go away.

 

[Phish]

They're still around, just not on YouTube.

Jaimie's instagram ain't too rough on the old eyes either.

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[Harry Powell]

It must burn pats ass that the inspector is probably telling him " I dont care who reported it, they were right. You didnt get a permit and its installed wrong." Pat thinks if he ignores it, they will go away.

Well it’s just like how he thinks by us saying “nigger”, our constitutional rights are invalidated.

To Pat, it doesn’t matter that the fence is wrong. It matters that the Pests reported it. And as you said, the City gives zero fucks about that.