One of the most ridiculous tough guy stories ever told

[Josef Kuminski]

These are creative writing exercises for grade 8 children. If someone is going to be acting like that, they're not going to back down to a faggot like Rick. A cowhand walked into a corner store that my buddy worked at, he gave the dude a goofy look and the dude straight up decked him in the face. Thats probably how Rick's story would have went down if this were true.

Well that’s what these are. The Tomlinson Tall Tales serve two purposes. The first is to make Rick look like an actual tough guy. The second is to push his creative boundaries and see what he can get away with.

In my 20s I dated a chick like Rick. She would make shit up all the time. She’d make these claims that you couldn’t prove or disprove until she made a whopper of a claim that I looked into and was able to prove false. Things started to snowball from there and I dumped her crazy ass.

 

[JackieTober]

Pat regularly uses hack jokes like “don’t forget my fries.” or “make it a quadruple double bacon cheeseburger with 4 milkshakes, I did legs today drive thru child.” So he definitely abuses waitstaff.

Yeah he told that one waiter something about “didn’t I order a baked potato” during one of his stupid online spats. And then it turns out that guy now owns his own restaurant or is a successful chef or something. He’s an enormous piece of shit but the funniest part to me is that the waiter he looked down on is now way more successful than Pat will ever be.

 

[Suetonius]

“My bartender buddy” this nigga thinks the people serving him are his friends.

 

[IGotATreeOnMyHouse85]

We know this story is fake since most of the time Pat is sitting at a bar he’s by himself. Also there’s no bouncer yet where’s the manager? Most places wouldn’t let a customer just come behind the bar without issue which is where a manager would step in. But no, they just let some drunk get behind the bar which is a huge liability. Good thing Pat was there to save the day!

 

[The DMAN]

“My bartender buddy” this nigga thinks the people serving him are his friends.

Rick gave him hot sauce. That makes them friends.

 

[Cygnus Nana X-1]

We know this story is fake since most of the time Pat is sitting at a bar he’s by himself. Also there’s no bouncer yet where’s the manager? Most places wouldn’t let a customer just come behind the bar without issue which is where a manager would step in. But no, they just let some drunk get behind the bar which is a huge liability. Good thing Pat was there to save the day!

Bzzzzttttt, wrong. The bouncer is there to protect the patrons from me, child.

 

[Kim_Jong_Poon_]

Was it ever confirmed that Pat is actually banned from this bar? Someone claimed they saw a reddit thread about it a while back

 

[Honey Badger]

I like how Pat’s stories always end immediately after his quippy tough guy one liners. Who needs to know pointless details about the aftermath, like what the drunk guy said in response?

 

[RoTheHo69]

Was it one of those fancy Toyotas made by BMW at least? Then I could see bringing up the Toyota..

 

[RickReternal]

She’s a pillhead who sleeps 23 hours a day, I doubt she’s even aware of most of them

“Nikki” liked every one of his tweets back when likes were visible. It’s fucking WEIRD that he took over her social media other than maybe Facebook. “No wife child, iT is too dangerous.”

 

[VizioDash]

“Nikki” liked every one of his tweets back when likes were visible. It’s fucking WEIRD that he took over her social media other than maybe Facebook. “No wife child, iT is too dangerous.”

Yeah and he didn’t even try and hide that. He would post and then immediately switch over to her account and like it.

 

[Rdrk]

Just a fella having a couple drinks with his honey. Did this take place in 1963?

 

[RaggotFetard]

I was at the Garage a few months ago. Place sucked.

 

[Gay Faggot.]

I like how Pat’s stories always end immediately after his quippy tough guy one liners. Who needs to know pointless details about the aftermath, like what the drunk guy said in response?

He just got sick of repeating “shut up, faggot”.

 

[JackieTober]

I like how Pat’s stories always end immediately after his quippy tough guy one liners. Who needs to know pointless details about the aftermath, like what the drunk guy said in response?

It’s just as convenient as the Brotosaurus standing there and letting Pat lecture him for 20 minutes without saying anything.

 

[FattyPneumonia]

You can tell in this lie how much more confident the pig was back then. Also, and rick isnt the only one, Reddit-esque creative writing as a personality is psychotic.

 

[JoeBrotheChildSpitGuzzler]

While Patrick is STUPID enough to get in an argument with an armed man, however he's too much of a pussy to actually do so-

This whopper of a lie is perhaps worse than his lie(s) about winning two knife fights (with one of the fights taking place on an Indian reservation.

Edit: Another way to tell that is one if Patrick's many lies, is that you cannot open carry in an establishment that has an alcohol/liquor license.

And anyone who carries is aware of this. Can't carry concealed either.

Also he writes it to much like a story where events are laid out for the reader vs a person recounting something that happened. He says he was well dressed, kinda short but he's not negative about him until later shen he calls him a leprechaun. Someone recounting something like this would probably not be that fair to him.

"Everyone laughed about him"
Again patty consensus building means it's important he knows Everyone saw it his way and noticed this

But

Also if a man with a gun makes a scene and refuses to leave for any length of time, the cawps would awn the way.

And pats cutesie 'great place. Love it. Things got weird" just makes it seem more fictional when you read it in his stupid, trying to be funny cadence.

I've seen people get tossed from bars for FAR less than this. As soon as he starts to take off his shoe, they tell him to get the fuck out. Doesn't matter if there's no bouncer. I was at a bar one Sunday night and it was just me, the bartender and one of the regulars and these guys walked in visibly wasted and one carrying a skateboard that was snapped in half. She immediately told them she wasn't serving them and to leave. You just need to have common sense and experience.in life to know he's lying

 

[Cygnus Nana X-1]

I like how Pat’s stories always end immediately after his quippy tough guy one liners. Who needs to know pointless details about the aftermath, like what the drunk guy said in response?

A guy I worked with for a few years is a different Pat. Since me and several others worked on the same sites as him we learned his compulsive lying over time. Almost nothing he said was accurate or it was at least highly exaggerated or a flat out lie. Had the tendency to throw these types of stories out where he used a clever line. At some point he got badly injured then came with crutches 2 months later and told us everyone stood up and clapped for him (but they didnt cheer). I don't know if he ever said the truth about anything. His whole life is a larp and lie just like Fatrick.

 

[JoeBrotheChildSpitGuzzler]

There was the time CM Punk handed a cop 50lb dumbbells
View attachment 261949

God I hate that Faggot. If he'd just stayed calm instead of being a retard all that could have been avoided. I hate faggots who thinks they are going to negotiate with or threaten a cop then get pissed when someone doing just that gets tased

 

[Niki's Bull]

Was it ever confirmed that Pat is actually banned from this bar? Someone claimed they saw a reddit thread about it a while back

Patrick and Lynne attacking Black-owned businesses again

She’s been posting about Rick every hour or two still. Keep it up kween

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