My name is Niki
I am Patrick’s second wife
I refused to take his name
I hate his guts for ruining my life
If you hear a SWAT team late at night
Some kind of oinking, some kind of fight
It’s just my husband’s SWAT-for-hire
He stiffed when his Samsung fell in mire
He blames the trolls but he’s a liar
I think it's 'cause I’m dopey
I signed off on all our debts
Maybe it's because he’s crazy
He sued the trolls, and lost his pants
He’ll only stop the day he dies
Until that day, I’ll bide my time
I just don't argue anymore
My pleas to stop engaging trolls
Are shushed with "No, child", then ignored
Yes, we’re on the news again
Trying to get victim points
The public sees through our bullshit
And points out holes in our tall tales
I guess I wish we’d never met
Cuz now I’m stuck with this asshole’s debt
Just don't ask me how I am
I live with a red-faced fatty ham
And wish I’d married that girl named Jen
My name is Niki
I medicate to dull my mind
Pat has a contempt of court date
I hope he’s thrown in county this time
If you hear me peel out late at night
I’ve left that dummy, I’m now in flight
Just don't ask me where I’ve gone
Just don't ask if I’ll be back
I’m sitting out his heart attack
He’ll only stop the day he dies
He tweets and texts trolls all the time
I just don't argue anymore
I just don’t argue anymore
I just don’t argue anymore
