How many miles will it tow your wife in her livestock trailer?
You've gone from "EVs barely work for urban bugmen" to "If it can't tow a 7500lb John Deere, it's useless to all mankind!"
The reality is most people aren't trying to haul a John Deere 6 series with their four-door sedan, that's why shit like Camrys and Civics are so popular; and
a Tesla will handle most recreational boats just fine. And if you need something bigger, then buy something bigger - they make an electric F150 now.
One; but you'd want to stop for lunch and hose down your wife to stop her drying out anyway so an hour's break is no big deal. Remember, you can charge an electric car at home overnight - you never need to visit a gas station again. Trade that job against having to take a meal break on a 600 mile trip and it's not so bad.
Or, just move closer to Seaworld.
It's tricky to estimate as there's no hard end date on them; they just hold less and less power over time. The current guess is between 300,000 and 500,000 miles, and it'll cost about $13k to replace. So, if you replace the battery at the 300,000 mile stage, that's about 4.5 cents per mile in running costs. That goes down to 2.6 cents per mile if you leave it to 500,000, and zero if you don't give a fuck and only drive the thing less than, say, 150 miles per day. Bear in mind Tesla came up with a plan to sell second-hand Tesla batteries as "Powerwalls" for home power storage.... and then couldn't get enough second-hand batteries. They don't seem to be dying as quickly as expected.
Throw in another 4.5 cents a mile for power to run the thing.
You're comparing second-hand cars with brand new top-of-the-line Teslas. Once the EV market fills out with some competitors and Tesla finally ship enough cars to meet demand, we'll start to see some second-hand cars and prices on new ones drop.
I think you've also got an argument there that EVs are both "too expensive" and "perfect for bugmen who don't own
things, like
cars" which you probably want to work on for a bit before you bring it out again.