I'd love to make pig noises in the audience

[TorqueWheeler]

You'd think the Milwaukee PD would get their heads out of their collective asses and do something about it, but no. No. They do absolutely nothing. *Chuckles*

(Silence)

Like hmmm, we were just at this guy's house last week and that turned out to be a SWATTing attempt from my cyberstlakers. Let me just rub my only two brain cells together and figure out that this is another SWATTing attempt. *Chuckles* No. They don't do that. No, send another SWAT team to this house to point guns at the owners. That's the right call.

(Someone coughs)

Knock knock! It's the Milwaukee PD! We have once again fallen for the lies of the people trying to kill you! *Chuckles* Please, it is important we put your family's life in danger and wake you up at 3 am because we don't learn anything ever! *Chuckles* Absolutely insane. Absolutely insane how incompetent they are.

(Patrick makes a durr face and hits the mic against his temple)

I'm a sergeant for the Milwaukee PD, I can't even remember which way I'm supposed to put on my pants, nevertheless understand when an innocent citizen is being threatened by his cyberstlakers so I can step in and actually do something about it instead of just shooting innocent black people! *Chuckles*

(Sound of ice cubes clinking)

So Elon Musk bought twitter...

Pat is sweating reading this wondering how you got a look at his joke book.

 

[RickReternal]

You'd think the Milwaukee PD would get their heads out of their collective asses and do something about it, but no. No. They do absolutely nothing. *Chuckles*

(Silence)

Like hmmm, we were just at this guy's house last week and that turned out to be a SWATTing attempt from my cyberstlakers. Let me just rub my only two brain cells together and figure out that this is another SWATTing attempt. *Chuckles* No. They don't do that. No, send another SWAT team to this house to point guns at the owners. That's the right call.

(Someone coughs)

Knock knock! It's the Milwaukee PD! We have once again fallen for the lies of the people trying to kill you! *Chuckles* Please, it is important we put your family's life in danger and wake you up at 3 am because we don't learn anything ever! *Chuckles* Absolutely insane. Absolutely insane how incompetent they are.

(Patrick makes a durr face and hits the mic against his temple)

I'm a sergeant for the Milwaukee PD, I can't even remember which way I'm supposed to put on my pants, nevertheless understand when an innocent citizen is being threatened by his cyberstlakers so I can step in and actually do something about it instead of just shooting innocent black people! *Chuckles*

(Sound of ice cubes clinking)

So Elon Musk bought twitter...

You’re capturing his rage well here. Even that isn’t interesting or relatable. It’s repellent because he’s so fucking dumb. He can’t do anything with it.

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

Lmao is he talking about the Bremen Cafe where they give everyone 2 minutes and the only people showing up are the "comics" working out their material?

That's not a guest set faggot. What happened? I thought we took away his self proclaimed comedian status?

That has pats hoof prints all over it. Is that the same antifa dive bar he said he did stand up at a couple years ago? What a dump. I bet pat irritates the regulars there too.

 

[Turk February]

That has pats hoof prints all over it. Is that the same antifa dive bar he said he did stand up at a couple years ago? What a dump. I bet pat irritates the regulars there too.

View attachment 124850

Couldn't hurt to call a few dozen times to confirm, right?

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

Couldn't hurt to call a few dozen times to confirm, right?

It wont do anything they are just like him and I doubt he is even on a list. He just has to show up.

I hope they serve meatloaf!

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

There it is...

 

[Turk February]

There it is...

View attachment 124855

Anyone writing complaints about his offensive antisemitic dog whistling material? (On Reddit of course)

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

Anyone writing complaints about his offensive antisemitic dog whistling material? (On Reddit of course)

As long as he says "nazi" a few times and has a couple trump quips they should all clap with approval. Its a big pander session where he can let everyone know what an ally he is.

 

[Turk February]

As long as he says "nazi" a few times and has a couple trump quips they should all clap with approval. Its a big pander session where he can let everyone know what an ally he is.

I don't know, "I" was "there" and what I "heard" was "antisemitic" "dogwhistling"

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

 

[TorqueWheeler]

That has pats hoof prints all over it. Is that the same antifa dive bar he said he did stand up at a couple years ago? What a dump. I bet pat irritates the regulars there too.

View attachment 124850

I'd love to see a biker gang roll in with iron crosses everywhere and see how fast that sign comes down.

 

[John Wayne Gacy]

I'm on the fence with this. On one hand, he seems a little too upfront broadcasting this on his Twitter, and I wonder if this is all a pitiful attempt to lure one of his "stlakers" to a public place and hopefully things escalate so the police get involved. On the other hand, he's a fat retard starving for attention, so why not empty his surreal baggage onto a small, half-drunk hipster audience. I'm happy to see where it goes either way, though.

 

[TorqueWheeler]

For a guy who doesn't even own sneakers Pat sure has a lot of sneakers that perfectly match the colorway of the sneakers the vandal wore.

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

For a guy who doesn't even own sneakers Pat sure has a lot of sneakers that perfectly match the colorway of the sneakers the vandal wore.

" So my wife left me...."

 

[TorqueWheeler]

" So my wife left me...."

"What's the deal with your pregnant wife leaving you for your friend and now you get drunk and put a gun in your mouth every single night but are too much of a coward to pull the trigger? Anybody? Just me?

(......)

Anyway..."

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

"What's the deal with your pregnant wife leaving you for your friend and now you get drunk and put a gun in your mouth every single night but are too much of a coward to pull the trigger? Anybody? Just me?

(......)

Anyway..."

He is totally going to try and shoehorn him being swatted a bunch so he can get some of that sweet pity. It probably wont even have anything to do with the punchline.

 

[Turk February]

He is totally going to try and shoehorn him being swatted a bunch so he can get some of that sweet pity. It probably wont even have anything to do with the punchline.

"So I have a must have a fly in my attic or something, because someone keeps swatting my house ehehehehehehehe but seriously folks, they had assault rifles and shotguns in me and my wifes face."

 

[Torque’sHeadBump]

I'm betting his set is 25% politics sperging, 25% star wars/trek puns or some other dork shit, and 50% schizophrenic rambling about stlakers and swattings and internet hate mobs. I gotta see this.

Trump/Elon will get a lot of attention, then it’ll be about his stlakers. I think he’ll make one nerd joke and then he’ll talk about his ex wife. FATLY.

 

[Salted Earth Truffle]

Funny how he never gets invited to perform for money, just shows up at open mic events (or used to, rather) while claiming he pays the mortgage with comedy. He is such a fucking loser and the secondhand embarrassment is barely tolerable. But this is Pathetic Pat’s actual life!

Lol. Lmao, even.

 

[Suetonius]

I wonder what would happen if someone went to one of his sets with a #PayQuasi shirt. Not do anything. Just sit there and watch his act. #Notacrime