I know we're all fawkin tough guys here but I wouldn't go anywhere near Patrick.

[Opesterino]

Rick has the arms of a first year lunch lady and is in the same shape as a rotting pear. His only hope in a fight is leveraging his mass (fat, tons of fat) against someone on the ground. He’s too rotund for a boxing match and I’d bet my entire life savings with weapons he’s beyond useless.

What I’m saying is he’s fat.

like how Fatty Arbuckle killed that Rappe whore.

 

[guest]

I'm surprised he hasn't killed himself or gone on a murder-suicide rampage at a republican rally at this point. He has quite literally hit rock bottom

That would be a reasonable conclusion if he was anything like his twitter persona irl. But all evidence points to him being fat chickenshit in the real world.

 

[guest]

like how Fatty Arbuckle killed that Rappe whore.

He was innocent!

 

[UnPRePared]

I'm a 55 year old Scottish musician without an ounce of rage issues, and I'm not an alcoholic (despite being Scottish).

If we are speaking hypothetically, and in Minecraft, I could win in a fight quite easily against Patrick, despite the Hefty Heifer's weight advantage.

On Twitter, he can take his time to collect himself and respond with what he thinks is clever (it never is), but in person he has no luxury. We heard Josiah 5, "Shut your fucking MOUF!" is just the tip of the boiling point. You get him that mad and the fight is over in seconds, he's like Forrest Gump without the hyper focus. Trip, punch, cry, bowel evacuation, done.

Of course, it's all theoretical. I'll probably never visit America, and I certainly don't want to visit the Mad Max-scape known as Milwaukee. I'd rather experience the food and sights of Chicago, while Gosia would love to see New York just once.

And frankly, just one punch landing means I have his obesity grease all over my playing hand.

 

[More Worser]

I wouldn’t be able to easily take him if he tried to attack me, especially when you remember that he looks like this:

Only because he has such a low center of gravity.

 

[More Worser]

That would be a reasonable conclusion if he was anything like his twitter persona irl. But all evidence points to him being fat chickenshit in the real world.

No fat at all, child.

And, no. Not chickenshit at all, child.

And, no. Not in the real world at all, child.

 

[More Worser]

like how Fatty Arbuckle killed that Rappe whore.

Rappe-ist

 

[ViVillHaVin!]

Pat is under the impression he's allowed to do whatever he wants to you if you go near him, and the police will thank him for it.

 

[IGotATreeOnMyHouse85]

Pat is under the impression he's allowed to do whatever he wants to you if you go near him, and the police will thank him for it.

He does believe this because in his mind he’s the “good guy” and the police will step in when he’s done dishing out his kind of Justice.

 

[ViVillHaVin!]

He does believe this because in his mind he’s the “good guy” and the police will step in when he’s done dishing out his kind of Justice.

That's why it's problebly not safe to go near him when he's in a rage mood. He's a "trained knife fighter". Who cares, unless he thinks it's ok to stab people

 

[More Worser]

Pat is under the impression he's allowed to do whatever he wants to you if you go near him, and the police will thank him for it.

Yes, hence his outrage when they did what he should have known they'd do when he SWATTed himself

 

[guest]

Yes, hence his outrage when they did what he should have known they'd do when he SWATTed himself

No ribs. None.