I decided to be kind to a stranger today. Big mistake.

[Smeckler's Powder]

Oh shit, funny you mention this
I was walking out of a building that's always busy with people walking in and out, so it's common courtesy to hold the door open for the next person to walk out of, so the door doesn't slam in their face.

So I held it expecting the next person to hold it for the next person, but he just walked on through like I was the fucking door man. Didn't even say thanks.

I've never wanted to fucking glass someone more in my entire fucking life.

Since then I don't hold the door for anyone, I just let it slam in their face.

If they don’t say thanks I do a big obnoxiously exaggerated “YOURE WELCOME!!”

Was walking into the chiropractor recently and held the door for this stupid twat behind me who just went up and got in line in front of me. Then I’m still trying to check in and she comes back and interrupts about how she’s leaving since there were too many people there.

 

[Professor Rape]

If they don’t say thanks I do a big obnoxiously exaggerated “YOURE WELCOME!!”

Was walking into the chiropractor recently and held the door for this stupid twat behind me who just went up and got in line in front of me. Then I’m still trying to check in and she comes back and interrupts about how she’s leaving since there were too many people there.

That would send me over the edge.

 

[BUBBLER]

If they don’t say thanks I do a big obnoxiously exaggerated “YOURE WELCOME!!”

Was walking into the chiropractor recently and held the door for this stupid twat behind me who just went up and got in line in front of me. Then I’m still trying to check in and she comes back and interrupts about how she’s leaving since there were too many people there.

Nigga you go to a chiropractor?

Spend your money on a gym membership

 

[Smeckler's Powder]

Nigga you go to a chiropractor?

Spend your money on a gym membership

I don’t regularly. After I healed from a broken leg 5 years ago I went a few times to see if that helps de-bed-ridden my skeleton and after two times I realized it had cured my 2 decade had jaw popping/not being able to open my mouth all the way. Two years later I went a couple times and then went again a couple months ago. So I guess I’m roughly on a every two years pop in. But yeah, working out more and yoga might keep my shit from needing to go.

 

[Smeckler's Powder]

That would send me over the edge.

I was trying to think of a funny way to call her a bitch but was gabberflasted

 

[Professor Rape]

I was trying to think of a funny way to call her a bitch but was gabberflasted

You can give her a note and pretend you're giving her your phone number and then when she unfolds the paper it says something like "you're a fucking cunt"
I dunno I like to avoid face to face confrontations whenever possible, by then I've gotten out of there

 

[DMbA]

I was trying to think of a funny way to call her a bitch but was gabberflasted

so she didnt even get a ur welcome?

 

[Stent]

When your friend tried to get you to work at his sales job, did it sound like he was pitching the job to you, meaning you knew the work would be fucking shit?

Because I've had a guy like that. "You'll make so much money, bro! And there's heaps of ladies working there!" Will I, is there? You're a fucking salesman dude, I'm not trusting you.

Sales faggots are always selling. I flat out said I couldn't be a sales person because I couldn't go around lying to people. He was offended, but it's not like they ever have a counterpoint to that accusation which isn't also a lie.

 

[Smeckler's Powder]

This is always a cathartic watch

FAAAAAWK

 

[Smeckler's Powder]

so she didnt even get a ur welcome?

lol she might have said thanks but then got right in front of me at the desk 2 feet away

 

[Smeckler's Powder]

so she didnt even get a ur welcome?

 

[Turk February]

You ever hold the door for an old guy and he gives you shit for making him rush? Like, no, you old prick. I would've stood there all fucking day holding the door for you and not given a shit and now you're lucky I don't slam it shut as soon as you get there.

Holding the door for people is the stupidest fucking non-helpful thing ever. How does it even help anyone? It's a fucking door. It's designed to be opened. It's not a complex mechanismz and unless it autolocks when closed, holding it is a fucking song and dance done to look helpful when you're useless. Fuck it as a cultural practice, it's retarded. And yes, you do make people rush by doing it.

 

[Ladynyahh]

When I see these people standing on the median at traffic lights asking for money I like to yell out (if they're walking upright without any indication of physical disability) "get a job" as I am passing them on the way to the job site with my container of coffee

 

[ミスタースパーコル]

Being kind to strangers is for faggots.

The only thing worse is being kind to people you actually know.

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

Holding the door for people is the stupidest fucking non-helpful thing ever. How does it even help anyone? It's a fucking door. It's designed to be opened. It's not a complex mechanismz and unless it autolocks when closed, holding it is a fucking song and dance done to look helpful when you're useless. Fuck it as a cultural practice, it's retarded. And yes, you do make people rush by doing it.

Complex Mechanismz is what I'm going to call my Methods Of Mayhem style supergroup.

 

[Jenna]

Occasionally I'll buy some shit for like $4.92 and pay with cash, come across a homeless person begging for money and go "I just got some change back from the store, it's not much but do you want it?"

The look on their face when you give them a nickel and three pennies and then a "you're welcome!" smile is pretty funny. They want to badly to call me a honky motherfucker but never do.

 

[TorqueWheeler]

I was sick of being such a miserable angry cock to everyone so figured id be nice.

A guy was asking for donations for a charity on a street corner but i dont have change. So instead of ignoring ppl like that like i usually do, i said "nah not today, sorry. Have a good day though." And he replied "whatever".

Whatever? He said it rudely too. I fkin said have a good day. My first time being kind like that in years and i get that shit back.

Fuck him, fuck being kind. I'm fed up with this wuuurld.....

From now on ill be an even bigger dick to people. Fuck it.

I think, at a minimum, you should have taken a run up and kicked his teeth out. Show him who's boss, if you will. Maybe whip your dick out and piss into his open mouth as he gasps for oxygen while his gums piss blood into his mouth since you booted his teeth out.

 

[TorqueWheeler]

Occasionally I'll buy some shit for like $4.92 and pay with cash, come across a homeless person begging for money and go "I just got some change back from the store, it's not much but do you want it?"

The look on their face when you give them a nickel and three pennies and then a "you're welcome!" smile is pretty funny. They want to badly to call me a honky motherfucker but never do.

I once bought a bum a sandwich and he was legit upset because he just wanted the money to buy booze or drugs presumably. Now I'd sooner take a shit in my hands and smear it around their faces.

 

[Brooke Shields]

Offer a sandwich, junkie'll say no, buy one and put a $20 in the middle, come back and say "Are you sure you don't want this?", then when they say okay sure you say FAWK ruined my BIT and pull out the 20 n throw the sandwich on the ground

 

[We Have Everything]

Not only am I richer than y'all Im also more charitable and merciful to the poor. EVERY PIECE OF CHARITY CAME BACK TO ME 10FOLD...it's why im a property owner/entrepreneur during the apex of my youth.