How the fawk (dan: opie/chip version of fuck) do you meet anyone on a dating app?

[guest]

Do you actually want a relationship or are you looking for a slam pig?

Opster wants a lindsay

 

[ShutYourCakeHorn]

Opster wants a lindsay

Are you as well endowed as The Opester?

 

[guest]

Are you as well endowed as The Opester?

View attachment 50964

Opester's got some cock...

 

[ShutYourCakeHorn]

Opester's got some cock...

They don't call him The Destroyer for nothing!

 

[Easily_Remembered]

Have you considered telling her that you would "rut in her shit" and then proceed to launch into an hour long race rant?

 

[guest]

I don't think dating apps are a good way of finding a quality lady, because why would a quality lady be using a dating app?

Yeah fuck this. I'm gonna delete. It's pretty cool how I'm constantly getting so many matches and likes and shit though. Boosted up my confidence. I was fawkin' howling whenever I'd match with a Portuguese woman. Hey Dan, they're all hotter than your faggot wife.

 

[guest]

A reddit guy made an app as Patrick and is messages some whores then sending me the conversations.

Some are actually responding to being chilled and lectured on Amazon sale policies. It's pretty bizarre

 

[guest]

A reddit guy made an app as Patrick and is messages some whores then sending me the conversations.

Some are actually responding to being chilled and lectured on Amazon sale policies. It's pretty bizarre

lol

I actually met what looks to be my dream girl. I can't believe it. And we're having a great conversation. The issue is... she's 3 inches taller than me. Which is what I want! But I know girls are really fucking adamant about not being the taller one. Fuck. I also don't know how to break that to her without coming across insecure.

 

[guest]

lol

I actually met what looks to be my dream girl. I can't believe it. And we're having a great conversation. The issue is... she's 3 inches taller than me. Which is what I want! But I know girls are really fucking adamant about not being the taller one. Fuck. I also don't know how to break that to her without coming across insecure.

Did you copy and paste this from a gay reddit page?

Delete the account, turn it into Patrick and have some fun. I've had girls tell me that they get so impressed when a guy has the balls to just approach them in public, because most are such faggots these days and hide behind online profiles. Just my 2 cents, what do ya want from me. Jobsite, 16, dick....not explaining those Dan.

 

[guest]

Did you copy and paste this from a gay reddit page?

Delete the account, turn it into Patrick and have some fun. I've had girls tell me that they get so impressed when a guy has the balls to just approach them in public, because most are such faggots these days and hide behind online profiles. Just my 2 cents, what do ya want from me. Jobsite, 16, dick....not explaining those Dan.

I was about to delete it until this 1 chick started talkin' to me. She's what I'm into physically. Like I couldn't fawkin' believe it.
When she stops replying, and she will, I will delete the app.

 

[Prince Bvstin]

Offer to buy the bitch dinner. Women like being taken out on dates. Duh.

 

[Riccardo Bosi]

Yeah fuck this. I'm gonna delete. It's pretty cool how I'm constantly getting so many matches and likes and shit though. Boosted up my confidence. I was fawkin' howling whenever I'd match with a Portuguese woman. Hey Dan, they're all hotter than your faggot wife.

I was about to delete it until this 1 chick started talkin' to me. She's what I'm into physically. Like I couldn't fawkin' believe it.
When she stops replying, and she will, I will delete the app.

Then go for broke. Fuck it. Now you have an advantage.

It's like that Lindemann song: Ich bin Platz Eins, alles oder nichts, Platz Eins, ICH IM RAMPENLICHT

(guess what I'm listening to lately)

 

[Upton Baby Sinclair]

Then go for broke. Fuck it. Now you have an advantage.

It's like that Lindemann song: Ich bin Platz Eins, alles oder nichts, Platz Eins, ICH IM RAMPENLICHT

(guess what I'm listening to lately)

Mewler reading Mein Kampf on NPS?

 

[SensibleKeks]

A lot of women use dating apps to boost their ego. I went out with a plain Jane and she had over 200 matches. How the fuck can an incel like me even compete?

 

[johnnynoname]

Go outside, retard.
Trial and error. There’s women everywhere.

amd while this is a preferable answer, OP probably already knows this

fuck- we all know this but dating apps are literally a game so whenever someone asks "how do I get better at online dating" they aren't asking for dating advice- ------they are asking how to beat a mini boss in Elden ring

You can be a extremely normal guy with no flaws/zero signs of autism but be a horrible online dater...online dating has nothing to do with whatever works in real life-----it's a video game and you should look it like a video game

I forgot what my point was

 

[Caverlock]

Why lie? What the fuck are they expecting to happen? Even if you're cool with the kids, they still lied which isn't cool for anyone.

I don't know. I thought maybe Bumble was more like Tinder than I had thought, and they were just looking to have fun, and thought not mentioning kids would avoid drawing out the Weimers, but no, they were looking for actual relationships.

The first one had lost custody of her two kids "all because of (her) husband". She was allowed to see them whenever she wanted (wow!), but her husband was NOT allowed to see them under any circumstances, and their legal guardian was HIS mother. Sounds like a swell guy. I think she had someone else helping her write messages, because she way less coherent in person. She was really beautiful in her pictures but had obviously done drugs hardcore for at least 3-4 years. She was laughing about her "teeth being held in by bridgework." Charming. It was a goddamn disaster. I drove 40 minutes one-way for that "date."

The second one was also very pretty, and had an insane body, which, other than the absolutely perfect legs, I guess, was miraculous because she was in her mid-30's and had JUST had a baby. It wasn't even 1. She also had a great personality, and fulfilling and OK-paying career and I guess was just hoping to coast by on those. I simpishly felt really bad for days for turning off sociable mode as soon as we got to the parking lot after we ate and just walking away to my car like a robot, even though she had lied her ass off. It was the most fun first date I had ever been on. Perfectly flowing conversation and she was funny as hell, but when I got outside I just smiled and nodded and walked off while she was mid-sentence. She never messaged me after that. Oh, she didn't just have the 1-year-old, she had an 8- and 10-year-old, too.

I don't remember exactly how it was phrased, but you had to outright lie about not having kids in your profile. It was something really specific like, "do you have any children or children for whom you are willingly the primary caregiver? Indicate Yes or No." They both had answered, "No." No kids in their 6 or 7 pictures or mentioned anywhere in their bio, either.

 

[Say “Cookie”]

I was about to delete it until this 1 chick started talkin' to me. She's what I'm into physically. Like I couldn't fawkin' believe it.
When she stops replying, and she will, I will delete the app.

Stop dragging the conversation out, ask her on a date. The longer the app conversation goes the less interested she gets.

 

[Harry Powell]

Two suggestions:

1. There's a reality show on Netflix called The Circle, players get put in different apartments and can only communicate via text message. It's stupid as fuck but has helped me tremendously to study how alpha bro chads text attractive women. It's this weird mix of complimenting them, paying attention to some dumb shit they put on their profile, and being a lil' bit cheeky with the sexual stuff.

2. Never immediately message them back. If I get a message at 11:05am, I'll put an alarm in my phone for 2:33pm and do it then. If they message you back at 2:35pm, it means they want you.

Just on principle I refuse to put this kind of effort into meeting a bitch. It’s also why I haven’t gotten laid in a century but all these fuckin’ games? You can keep it.

 

[Harry Powell]

Are you as well endowed as The Opester?

View attachment 50964

It’s truly one of my favorite pics. His hair, everything about his appearance, the way he’s holding the fish, etc you know he is a retarded CHUD. Exactly the person he sounded like on da show, zero character played.

 

[guest]

Exactly, almost all women have guys standing in line for them, why do they need to use a app?

There has to be something wrong with them to do so.

A woman can go to every bar and have half of the guys there want to fuck them.

when i used (this now crap) app called Plenty of Fish, within 6 months I realized the same profiles are always at the 'top' of my recommended. Like they never settle down? I bet if i make a new account those same 3,4 accounts I remember will still be there. "My kids are my world" of course ever present in the bio.