How long could you do nothing at work before your boss noticed?

[HR@PaneraBread]

Thanks Bon, but "sandwich artist" isn't something we're looking for right now. Try @HR@PaneraBread

the books are closed

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

BLT. Hellman's on one side or both? Toasted or not? White, brown or malted wholegrain? Back or belly bacon? Iceberg or romaine? Heirloom, beefsteak or cherry? How important are the options?

Fuck off, you’re getting turkey and cheese with spit in it. So uhhh let me know once you’ve evaluated my résumé. Thanks.

 

[Chuck Berry's Toilet Cams]

When I worked at Wal Mart pushing carts back in 2007, I would go punch in at 7am, go get in my car and nap/listen to the radio for about an hour or so, go move a couple carts around, punch out for break, go back to the car for a very long break and BOOM dude, ya got ya lunch. I went to the car for the Adam Carolla and stayed for da Opie and Anthony. If not for that job I wouldn't be here with you brothermen.

 

[guest]

Fuck off, you’re getting turkey and cheese with spit in it. So uhhh let me know once you’ve evaluated my résumé. Thanks.

I would never order turkey in anything because I'm not Jewish. So good luck with the job hunt, Spitster

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

I would never order turkey in anything because I'm not Jewish. So good luck with the job hunt, Spitster

I’ll take that as a maybe. Just DM me when you make your decision. I hope you didn’t miss the part of my résumé that says “good team player and proficient in Microsoft Office.”

 

[ミスタースパーコル]

I'm doing stuff that really matters

Do ya?

 

[guest]

I’ll take that as a maybe. Just DM me when you make your decision. I hope you didn’t miss the part of my résumé that says “good team player and proficient in Microsoft Office.”

Office is for secretaries and accountants. How are you at reading company fundamentals? Have you had skin in the game and brought in solid returns consistently? If yes, then we can talk interview.

BTW, one side, malted, untoasted, belly, iceberg, heirloom.

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

Office is for secretaries and accountants. How are you at reading company fundamentals? Have you had skin in the game and brought in solid returns consistently? If yes, then we can talk interview.

BTW, one side, malted, untoasted, belly, iceberg, heirloom.

Why are you being so racist?

 

[guest]

Why are you being so racist?

It's an inevitable by-product of being apparently. Pointing it out is problematic and racist too tho

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

It's an inevitable by-product of being apparently. Pointing it out is problematic and racist too tho

I look forward to my inevitable job interview with you.

 

[guest]

I look forward to my inevitable job interview with you.

No you don't.

 

[Dog Eater]

As long as I kept making sure other people showed up to work I could do nothing forever outside of projects. I’d hate that though.

 

[guest]

Haha, sorry @BonnieMcFarlaneMe2 maybe that came across as dismissive, I just meant it as a joke. No need to car crash like that hysterical faggot @gassers . He's a womanly bitch, you don't seem to be.

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

Haha, sorry @BonnieMcFarlaneMe2 maybe that came across as dismissive, I just meant it as a joke. No need to car crash like that hysterical faggot @gassers . He's a womanly bitch, you don't seem to be.

I NEED A FUCKING JOB. PLEASE EVALUATE MY RESUME AND GET BACK TO ME. Am I a lazy drunk with little to no skills? Yes. But I thought we were friends and you’d cut me a break!