How does it all end?

[TorqueWheeler]

Hildy can pretend all he wants but on his death bed he will see his sister's cunt in his mind.

Low-key, destroying Hildy's every moment of alone time for the rest of his life might be the funniest and best part of this whole saga.

 

[Patrick O'Neal]

I don't think it can end. If Pat ends up in prison then Boomia will just get a job as a CO so as to be near him.

 

[Harry Powell]

After nearly drowning Patrick sails the boat to the wall of the dome. He finds a staircase leading to an exit door. Owen speaks to him directly through a speaker system encouraging him to stay and get a real job. Patrick utters his catchphrase “No child” and opens the door. The camera cuts to Patrick opening the door into Hooligans and sitting down at the bar. He pulls out his phone and the screen cuts to black.

Magnificent. The only problem here is that rather than choose to live a real life, Rick would 100% sail back to town and resume his false life, extremely happy to be THE SPECIAL BOY STAR OF THE SHOW

 

[Harry Powell]

I used to think this would end with Rick reacquainting himself with The Monster. But now I think that was a lie for attention and to add “depth” to his backstory. I don’t think any of this ever changes.

Therefore WE need to choose a somewhat arbitrary finish line. For me, that will be the loss of his Twitter. Once that’s gone, no matter what he says or does, Owen has won.

 

[TorqueWheeler]

I used to think this would end with Rick reacquainting himself with The Monster. But now I think that was a lie for attention and to add “depth” to his backstory. I don’t think any of this ever changes.

Therefore WE need to choose a somewhat arbitrary finish line. For me, that will be the loss of his Twitter. Once that’s gone, no matter what he says or does, Owen has won.

I'd agree with that previously but he's proven that he will stop at nothing to regain it even if it takes thousands and thousands of dollars. This fat, pathetic cunt needs to be in prison before I can ever sign off on making his life inconvenient. Regardless of what he said while leeching off of Robin Williams still-warm corpse, he clearly has too much hubris to ever consider ending it all himself.

 

[Dog Eater]

Magnificent. The only problem here is that rather than choose to live a real life, Rick would 100% sail back to town and resume his false life, extremely happy to be THE SPECIAL BOY STAR OF THE SHOW

OWEN: When Patrick read the synopsis for the lawsuit outcome episode he was…disappointed, to say the least. And I'm sure that's what caused him to call in the SWATings.

INTERVIEWER: But, how do you intend to explain the debt payments?

OWEN: Airbnb.

INTERVIEWER: Brilliant. Let's take some of those viewer phone calls. Somerville, Massachusetts. You're on with Owen.

 

[Uncle J’s Sink Emporium]

Prison, stroke, or heart attack

 

[Josef Kuminski]

Therefore WE need to choose a somewhat arbitrary finish line. For me, that will be the loss of his Twitter. Once that’s gone, no matter what he says or does, Owen has won.

As long as Rick has access to SM, he’s always going to poke the bear. Just remember last fall when everyone was ready to leave it alone, Ricky couldn’t.

 

[FatPatsBaps]

I am not suicidal, child.

 

[StlakerFatti]

All he really needs to do is to apologize for not finding Norm Macdonald funny.

 

[Ladynyahh]

I used to think this would end with Rick reacquainting himself with The Monster. But now I think that was a lie for attention and to add “depth” to his backstory. I don’t think any of this ever changes.

Therefore WE need to choose a somewhat arbitrary finish line. For me, that will be the loss of his Twitter. Once that’s gone, no matter what he says or does, Owen has won.

Oh but again baby child losing Twitter isn'T a thing. It isn'T on the Table

 

[Harry Powell]

As long as Rick has access to SM, he’s always going to poke the bear. Just remember last fall when everyone was ready to leave it alone, Ricky couldn’t.

Sure, but having 50k Twitter followers makes him feel special. He lords it over others. It’s his most prized possession. Once that is gone he can say or do whatever he wants but he won’t have ANYTHING left to pretend he is not a failure with.

 

[RobertMewler]

I'll be around waiting to see what the rascals post on his obituary page.

 

[Josef Kuminski]

Sure, but having 50k Twitter followers makes him feel special. He lords it over others. It’s his most prized possession. Once that is gone he can say or do whatever he wants but he won’t have ANYTHING left to pretend he is not a failure with.

That’s fair. But I’m not sure that’s going to happen unless the tranny that’s been his guardian Angel at X is fired and Rick isn’t allowed to get his account back.

 

[Patrick O'Neal]

There's a pretty obscure John Malkovich movie called Art School Confidential.

At the very end, the hero is sent to prison for some murders that he didn't commit. The thing is, it makes him famous and his artwork worth a lot of money so he just accepts it.

 

[Faggot Boqposter]

Patrick goes in to a drunken rage and beats Niki to death after his lawsuit is thrown out and he figures out the cops are on to him for the swattings.

He loads his Chinese glock and his .22 shitty bullpup rifle in to the rustang. He drives to Dan’s 5 sinker in mass, executed Dan and Flavia, sends a few hundred “enjoy prison” tweets to patty meatloaf and his toilet, then turns the gun on himself when the police arrive.

 

[Honoria]

Pat gets arrested by the FBI, he refuses all possible deals they make because he can't let the idiots win. In the process he accidentally admits to even more then they had and he spends a long time enjoying prison. Niki snaps out of her coma, makes a deal, and writes a book about living with a psychopath that sells exactly one more copy than The Ark.

Amazon, Hulu, and Netflix all do competing documentaries - Quasi is interviewed for the Netflix one, which wins an Emmy. Dan is in all three and becomes a meme.

 

[sShenaniganz]

I want to make a Don Quixote joke but I can't think of anything. Punching out.

Downs Quixote

 

[OpiesDelishHog]

I think it ends when Lynn finally decides to stop funding the Pig after he’s found guilty of self swatting or he loses the lawsuit. Lynn will quietly shuffle Nikki off to a padded cell and Piggy will be wishing all the negros in prison were only using his anus as a receptacle for farts instead of a pocket pussy.

I strongly feel that this lawsuit against the MPD was Lynn’s long game.

 

[guest]

For the chance of being able to forever say "psh I told you so" here's a prediction:

[REDACTED: long story short, Jackie gets caught; as to not give her ideas on how to avoid it, use your own imagination on this.]

While in custody Jackie has a mental breakdown and takes a few months to recover before her formal interviews begin.

Once she recovers she immediately shifts into a blame-and-deflect strategy where she tries to pin everything on Patrick. How successful this is I can only speculate, but I do believe Jackie will avoid the heaviest charges in return for her testimony.

The feds end up charging Patrick with the self swattings about six months to a year from now. Given the timing of his lawsuit against the MPD I believe they will move faster on this than usual.

Patrick goes to prison.

On 9/11 one or two years from now Dan organizes PatFest in Milwaukee. In attendance is a Netflix film crew finishing up the documentary. It releases to worldwide acclaim and disbelief, winning all sorts of industry awards. Dan's investment group makes record profits betting on Netflix stock rising in response to the documentary. Dan is somehow later charged with SEC violations and takes a deal to avoid ending up in federal prison alongside Patrick, effectively wiping out all profits from the Netflix trades.

And for the rest of us? It's simple: we all live happily ever after.