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Have you ever bent someone's car key with a needle nose pliers to ruin their fucking night?

alkiefuck2

don't call me scarface
Forum Clout
8,510
Not as funny as you psychopaths but one I feel bad about was a group of us dipping crisps into an open stank and making this girl eat them, I wasn't even that cruel as a kid but had to go with the flow maaaan.
 

TheGhostOfAbeVigoda

The Pope of Sandwich Village
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127,727
I was all pissed off one time and had to grab something out of my old shop. I always locked the door so I had my keys dangling out of my hand. I slammed the door shut as hard as I could because I was fuckin' MAD AT SOMETHING and I managed to slam the key to my van, pretty much the most important key I had at the time, in the door. It bent it to like an 80° angle. I just put it in a bench vise and tightened it as much as I could. The key's still bent but it works, you just have to wiggle it around until it's in. I still have that van. That van taught me about the shocking amount of attractive women that are willing to have sex with a psychotic piece of shit in what looks like a rape van.
 

TheGhostOfAbeVigoda

The Pope of Sandwich Village
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127,727
In high school we'd steal, from my buddies dads factory he ran, industrial length saran wrap that would fit the length of a golf club handle and would be kept on by the head or whatever it's called of the club so you could just run around cars/etc and could do an insane wrap job in like 1 minute.
My dad wrapped my hands in that shit for like a full day once. He was like "bust out of it" knowing goddamn well that it's impossible. It wasn't a punishment or anything either, he was just laughing at me.
 
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