Dude at work has a nub for a hand and I always accidentally give him the thumbs up

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

Somehow I’m always rude on accident. Things like saying “Chinese reset” in front of Asians or “monkeying around” in front of a black lady once. I think I might be moderately socially inept. Anyone else have some examples? I referred to a broad as “obviously a dike” last week but it was in front of the few people I trust not to care. She has half her teeth and within 5 weeks of employment has had Covid twice. My company still has a rule that it’s a free absence and they don’t make you prove it.

 

[Dark Dan Disciple]

Somehow I’m always rude on accident. Things like saying “Chinese reset” in front of Asians or “monkeying around” in front of a black lady once. I think I might be moderately socially inept. Anyone else have some examples? I referred to a broad as “obviously a dike” last week but it was in front of the few people I trust not to care. She has half her teeth and within 5 weeks of employment has had Covid twice. My company still has a rule that it’s a free absence and they don’t make you prove it.

I respect you more today than I did yesterday.

 

[LockedHDD__Pot]

I like saying slightly rude stuff, but I just look people in the eyes with a sweet grin on my face, then usually shoot them a quick wink... it's amazing what you can get away with if you vibe right

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

I respect you more today than I did yesterday.

That means a lot coming from you. I genuinely speak the same way here as I do in my day to day life. Once I tried to make an old joke about the black dude at work not knowing who Spudd Webb was but it was interpreted by everyone in the room as a black joke. Still fawkin crushed. Didn’t want to stop and say, “it’s because you’re old not black.” He’s also only 5 years older than me but he has 3 kids so I always see him as like 40.

 

[UnPRePared]

Could've pulled the Patrice.

".... What happened to ya hand, man?"

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

Could've pulled the Patrice.

".... What happened to ya hand, man?"

I think he was just born with it because it just looks underdeveloped and not injury mangled.

 

[BUBBLER]

I make an effort to ignore ugly bitches and interact with them as minimally needed to get the job done

Waste of my air and time.

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

I make an effort to ignore ugly bitches and interact with them as minimally needed to get the job done

Waste of my air and time.

Yeah, I talk to like maybe 5 people at work in a genuine manner. Everyone else it’s an, “I don’t speak unless spoken to” rule and it’s mostly pleasantries or vapid conversation. I don’t care about your life, your kids, what tv shows you watch so just leave Bonnie the fuck alone.

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

I was drunk one time and I just casually referred to a chick and her friend as "these bitches" to my friends right in front of them. They were indignantly like "bitches?" I said "No, it's okay I'm from [scumbag town I'm from]" They laughed hard and understood. That was my first time meeting them. I almost married the one.

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

I was drunk one time and I just casually referred to a chick and her friend as "these bitches" to my friends. They were indignantly like "bitches?" I said "No, it's okay I'm from [scumbag town I'm from]" They laughed hard and understood. That was my first time meeting them. I almost married the one.

“I mean it as a general term for women.”

 

[HR@PaneraBread]

My company still has a rule that it’s a free absence and they don’t make you prove it.

It's like, whatever, just don't put your diseased ass hands all over the goddamned food.

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

It's like, whatever, just don't put your diseased ass hands all over the goddamned food.

I still got beef with Panera. Not showing up for two weeks is apparently “insubordination.” Much happier at Taco Bell. Suck my dick.

 

[Sheeeeiiit]

I call all Chinamen Bruce and negros Jimmy in my head, fairly tame, but when it slips out they get a look of sadness on face that always gets me.

 

[Dummy Gaynuts]

A few weeks ago i absent-mindedly told a person in a wheelchair that it felt good to sit down because i had been walking all day

 

[Jims_Maroon_Pants]

 

[johnnynoname]

when he sticks his arm out, you have to look at his face to see if he's giving you a thumbs up, or the middle finger

 

[johnnynoname]

for the record, I've never met the man so I don't know if that's true

 

[captain_kamala]

When I was in the mental hospital the last time there was this dude with a little gimp arm. They took our blood pressure every day and he always wanted them to take it from the baby arm I wasn't sure why. Well one day they took me to the er for low blood pressure I was fine, didn't have any symptoms. I got an iv and a turkey sandwich and cranberry juice which was a major score.

 

[DMAN]

I like saying slightly rude stuff, but I just look people in the eyes with a sweet grin on my face, then usually shoot them a quick wink... it's amazing what you can get away with if you vibe right

This is primarily the only way The DMAN has survived in any professional (and maybe social now that he's thinking about it) setting.

Now of course the sharp tongued sass gets The DMAN in his fair share of difficult situations. The DMAN was seeing a cutie who had daddy issues because he died in a limo accident. So this girl joked about it all the time. And as the worm would say this girl was very edgy, my CHICK was making me fawking howl for hours. The one and only time The DMAN tried to put the boots to her dead daddy the same way she would, she tensed up and looked at The DMAN with the fury of a Mexican middle aged man. Wha happen? I tot we were all just havin fun?

 

[Rick Roblinson]

I went to school with a guy that had a little arm nub. Everyone called him Nemo.