- Forum Clout
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I’m gonna turn my faggot barometer on and go full gay for this one.It was always hilarious when a woman would come into the studio. And one of the comics would say something like "which one of us would you want to fuck?" or whatever. And it was almost always Opie. Or one of the random interns in some cases. The chef that Ian Halperin brought in asked Opie out after the show but I think he was engaged at that point. "Google it".
I still laugh when crackhead Vos was called a 'seven' by the waitress at the Cellar, and Norton and Patrice meekly combined for a seven. And then of course it leading to the infamous bombing. "Paul from Lawrence said it not me".
If you were a woman , Opie is the obvious choice. Everyone at O&A was visually a fucking mongrel and thats not getting into their personal lives.
We can rule out all the uncharismatic fat fucks like Erock, Bobby, and Roland immediately. Vos has the physicality of a ventriloquists dummy and his teeth fit the bill too. Once you hear him speak you realize he’s as stupid as he looks. Burr could only get a monkey to fuck him. Louis CK had to jerk off in front of his employees, not even famous enough to go full Weinstein. Patrice could probably fuck whoever just because he didn’t care, but the fact that he was a fat black guy meant he didn’t really have a chance besides rape. The interns and assorted employees were just as bad. They were gonna fuck Danny? David? 40 year old teenager Troy Quan? Steve Capri-si? Beak nose Travis? ….Sam? Fuck no.
So that brings me to the main 3. Anthony is ungodly ugly, more so than anyone else I previously mentioned. Balding, fake teeth, alcoholic, rough skin, unknown race, frail and flabby arms…a mustang can’t make up for that shit. Especially because everytime a girl would come in studio Anthonys go to move was to just act like a little boy. Thats not getting you pussy. Jim is a chinless, bald midget with 0 interests besides celebrity photos, penis, and Ozzy. He wouldn’t even succeed as a sugar daddy. And he wears maroon pants.
Then you look at Opie. If we’re going off of the time he was on O&A: He had a full head of hair with no grey to be seen. He actually had a chin. He was physically in shape. He didn’t fawn over girls like he needed to see their pussy or he would kill himself. He just didn’t give a fawwwwk. That’s attractive to women. The pooka shells and unfitted t shirts are a turnoff but better than fucking Kiss shirts and Tony two outfits.
What i’m getting at is i’m gay.