Do you manipulate your farts?

[aRTie02150]

I go out of my way to position myself to make them as loud as possible.

 

[soulbrotherman#1]

I take a quick audible inhale as a warning to my girlfriend she's about to hear a good one.
I also do that noise randomly without farting, just to keep her ears fart-trained

 

[guest]

Doesn't everyone?

 

[Fishing Bird]

I like to stinkmaxx by eating raw onions and a lot of lamb.

 

[guest]

I like to stinkmaxx by eating raw onions and a lot of lamb.

Raw onions give me volume and melody, but nothing makes them as horrendously smelly as the simple, age-old combination of lots of meat and alcohol.

 

[Nick Gerlips]

Hell yeah. My wife thinks I'm gonna hurt myself because I push farts out to make them louder.

 

[The Shah of Iran]

I used to piss off my ex by leaning to one side and raising a buttcheek off my seat in a crowded restaurant to tease a fart and then just hold it in til the place quietened down so more people would hear it

 

[Ant_It_Fun]

I've been known to cup my hand and give them a wah-wah effect if I know they're gonna be window-rattlers.

 

[Not bad]

I've been known to cup my hand and give them a wah-wah effect if I know they're gonna be window-rattlers.

Try smelling your hand afterwards. It usually smells like rubber and is intoxicating to be fawking honest witcha.

 

[Ant_It_Fun]

Try smelling your hand afterwards. It usually smells like rubber and is intoxicatong to be fawking honest witcha.

My farts smell like roses.

 

[JoshFromMichigan]

Those metal chairs in school were the best. One year, we had this huge fat kid who was held back the year before. He sat in the back of the class and would let them go all day long. It sounded like cannon fire.

 

[guest]

I just manipulate the hate

 

[Mick_Mickerson]

I used to piss off my ex by leaning to one side and raising a buttcheek off my seat in a crowded restaurant to tease a fart and then just hold it in til the place quietened down so more people would hear it

not cool in a restaurant tbchwy

one of more humorous things is farting a bunch in a car before you get out and it stays hermetically sealed in there.

 

[Nick Gerlips]

Those metal chairs in school were the best. One year, we had this huge fat kid who was held back the year before. He sat in the back of the class and would let them go all day long. It sounded like cannon fire.

Used to press my ass against hardwood floor as a kid and blast. Could hear it downstairs through the ceiling.

 

[PickleRickle]

Memba being little and taking baths? Why do all tub farts smell the same? Talk about giving yourself a rectal bong hit

 

[Jims_Maroon_Pants]

Pears and cool ranch Doritos instantly give gas

 

[Lamont & Tonelli]

Only emotionally. I gaslight my farts.

 

[DiarrheaDick]

Of course. I've been told my farts sound like someone's rubbing pastic on the wall, it sounds like my asshole is just gurgling, or it sounds like someone's using a spittoon. I have a whole repertoire depending on if I'm sitting, standing, walking, or laying awkwardly on the couch.

 

[Mr-Wrinkle-Paws]

Used to press my ass against hardwood floor as a kid and blast. Could hear it downstairs through the ceiling.

Try pushing ass against cheap Lowes hollow bathroom door, the kids would giggle for half hour after

 

[guest]

The only thing I do is try and "sift" the gas from the shit so I can get the air out. That is only done in emergencies if I have to shit really bad and have no toilet available. That can help lessen to urge to go.