There is nothing worse than dropping eggs on the floor

[Nigger John]

Fuck!!!! Is what I yelled

 

[Ha Ha Ha Holeee Shit!]

You gotta keep your sphincter closed.

 

[Dog Eater]

Fuck!!!! Is what I yelled

Better than dropping sperm on the floor amirite?

 

[The Arm]

The worst thing is the hypocrisy.

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

I used to work at a huge chicken farm. I've seen more eggs in one day than most people will see in their entire lives. Cleaning up broken eggs was a pretty big part of the job. We'd use a putty knife and a dustpan to clean it up. It was like scooping up jizz.

 

[Dog Eater]

It was like scooping up jizz.

I bet it was.

 

[Jack_Horner]

I used to work at a huge chicken farm. I've seen more eggs in one day than most people will see in their entire lives. Cleaning up broken eggs was a pretty big part of the job. We'd use a putty knife and a dustpan to clean it up. It was like scooping up jizz.

I once had a protein shake explode when I opened it.

Basically I'd made it about ten days earlier, and it had fermented in the bottle, and exploded when I opened it. It was like a grenade of brown sugary protein mixed in with curdled milk, and the blast radius was 200 square feet. Not exaggerating, the contents of the shake hit everything in my entire kitchen.

My fam flipped the fuck out, and we spent the next hour mopping it up and scrubbing down every surface.

Ten minutes later, I absent mindedly opened the OTHER one that I'd made, and it exploded too.

The fam wasn't too happy with me that day...

 

[Hudson Margera-Hughes]

I used to work at a huge chicken farm. I've seen more eggs in one day than most people will see in their entire lives. Cleaning up broken eggs was a pretty big part of the job. We'd use a putty knife and a dustpan to clean it up. It was like scooping up jizz.

You got another half retarded injun style story from the chicken farm, Abester?

I recall watching this truly horrific animal butchery documentary back in the very early 1990s and it fucked me up for life. A couple things I remember from it were that these scientists brought some adorable donkeys out into the outer blast radius of a nuclear bomb test to see what would happen and afterward the poor donkey was still alive and standing but its lips were stretched down to the ground. There was also a segment about baby chickens being harvested and that some of the lil angelic guys fell through the cracks and ended up getting suffocated by all the other chicken's piss and shit. A really demented documentary it was. I do not remember the name of it though. Never wanted to see it again tbchwy.

My friends and I started using "you're just the chicken that fell through" as an insult to one another. Ol' piss and shit covered ass nigga.

 

[Smeckler's Powder]

I once had a protein shake explode when I opened it.

Basically I'd made it about ten days earlier, and it had fermented in the bottle, and exploded when I opened it. It was like a grenade of brown sugary protein mixed in with curdled milk, and the blast radius was 200 square feet. Not exaggerating, the contents of the shake hit everything in my entire kitchen.

My fam flipped the fuck out, and we spent the next hour mopping it up and scrubbing down every surface.

Ten minutes later, I absent mindedly opened the OTHER one that I'd made, and it exploded too.

The fam wasn't too happy with me that day...

You should have kept opening them every time yall finished cleaning

 

[Jen_Tomlinson]

Fuck!!!! Is what I yelled

What are the batteries for?

 

[Riccardo Bosi]

I once had a protein shake explode when I opened it.

My dad had a bottle of homemade pomegranate juice that he left in his shed, and the bottle had exploded and there was glass and juice everywhere. 16, don't know dick about science.

 

[The NaTurryl Man]

WWAWD ovum retention?

 

[Africa.com]

One time I pulled the fridge door open and a tall bottle of oyster sauce fell out of it and shattered. At that exact moment I lost 1% of balanced and shifted my foot by a few inches directly onto a massive piece of glass that embedded itself in my pinky toe. Youre gonna be alright with your eggs faggot

 

[Dog Eater]

One time I pulled the fridge door open and a tall bottle of oyster sauce fell out of it and shattered. At that exact moment I lost 1% of balanced and shifted my foot by a few inches directly onto a massive piece of glass that embedded itself in my pinky toe. Youre gonna be alright with your eggs faggot

I’d have been so fucking angry.

 

[Africa.com]

I’d have been so fucking angry.

Well it was my fault I opened the door with retard strength to get the creamer bc I'm just not myself without my coffee.

 

[Professor Rape]

I'm so sorry Jim

 

[Nigger John]

Ok ok… I yelled “NIGGER”!!!!