• Reminder: Do not call, text, or mention harrassing someone in real life. Do not encourage it. Do not talk about killing or using violence against anyone, or engaging in any criminal behavior. If it is not an obvious joke even when taken out of context, don't post it. Please report violators. If you want your account deleted, or have other on-site inquiries, send a private message to @BlackQueerLivesMatter.

    Do not post IRL pranks here without including the source

    For DMCA, complaints, and other inquiries:

    [email protected]

The DMAN is curious about doing ass play stuff

nasty twp

Forum Clout
4,050
DMAN I care about your well-being, so I've got a few technical tips I've gleaned over the years.



First PREP PREP PREP. That means:
  • pre-gaming plenty of fibre and supplementing hours before (we gays like psyllium husk in a smoothie or Weetabix)
  • evacuating bowels, then waiting a bit
  • minimum 20-30 minutes or more of enema/douching (bidet and/or small bulb in the shower on a jet setting should do it)
  • antibacterial wash
  • putting down towels, old ratty throws, pvc sheets or anything you don't mind getting wet or dirty on the play surface

n.b. If you're sticking with the plug--which if it was a gag gift not from a partner, likely isn't good quality--do wash/sterilise it first, and only use it if it at least has a wide horizontal handle so it can't disappear into you and get stuck. We're trying to save you from perforation or fistula, here.

Tbhwy I'd recommend the curious look into an Aneros Helix/Tempo device or something similar. Though it's pricey and trickier to master, once it clicks you'll get so much more out of it than a cheap plug. Failing that, Njoy do a fantastic steel plug range.




Then get the toy and lube ready:
  • If you find that you tense up at the cold of lube or toys, pre-warm them with body heat, a bowl of warm water or if you're feeling extra Frauey a hot water bottle.
  • For lube, you'll want proper water-based stuff, or pure aloe gel. Don't be too much of a hippie and use shea butter, ghee, coconut oil, lotion or Vaseline etc. as they stain everything with grease, stink, chafe, and trap and spread bacteria/e.coli.


Next:
  • massage with fingers slowly (including the gooch and surrounding glute muscles, it's all connected)
  • abdominal breathing in a steady pattern
  • contract and release the PC muscles in a chain/wave effect
  • visualise anything that turns you on, don't limit your imagination, but try not to use porn as it draws focus away from your prostrate and onto your cock
  • if nothing's happening or you can't work the plug in comfortably though you're doing all the above, take short breaks or change position
  • re-up lube the toy and entrance as necessary, which may include basting it into the rectum if you can't get enough in and around the area

In case of too much tension or pain on insertion: if you can tolerate them, indica or CBD gummies relax your muscles. Lying on your back propped up with plenty of pillows under your tailbone also really helps.




Ofc goes without saying taking real cock is easier and more fun than either, but we're not ready for that conversation.

All the best and have a nice time, fella.
 
Last edited:

Uncle Floyd

It's time to play horsey!
Forum Clout
42,775
DMAN I care about your well-being, so I've got a few technical tips I've gleaned over the years.



First PREP PREP PREP. That means:
  • pre-gaming plenty of fibre and supplementing hours before (we gays like psyllium husk in a smoothie or Weetabix)
  • evacuating bowels, then waiting a bit
  • minimum 30 minutes or more of enema/douching (bidet and/or small bulb in the shower on a jet setting should do it)
  • antibacterial wash
  • putting down towels, old ratty throws, pvc sheets or anything you don't mind getting wet or dirty on the play surface

n.b. If you're sticking with the plug--which if it was a gag gift not from a partner, likely isn't good quality--do wash/sterilise it first, and only use it if it at least has a wide horizontal handle so it can't disappear into you and get stuck. We're trying to save you from perforation or fistula, here.

Tbhwy I'd recommend the curious look into an Aneros Helix/Tempo device or something similar. Though it's pricey and trickier to master, once it clicks you'll get so much more out of it than a cheap plug. Failing that, Njoy do a fantastic steel plug range.




Then get the toy and lube ready:
  • If you find that you tense up at the cold of lube or toys, pre-warm them with body heat, a bowl of warm water or if you're feeling extra Frauey a hot water bottle.
  • For lube, you'll want proper water-based stuff, or pure aloe gel. Don't be too much of a hippie and use shea butter, ghee, coconut oil, lotion or Vaseline etc. as they stain everything with grease, stink, chafe, and trap and spread bacteria/e.coli.


Next:
  • massage with gloved fingers slowly (including the gooch and surrounding glute muscles, it's all connected)
  • abdominal breathing in a steady pattern
  • contract and release the PC muscles in a chain/wave effect
  • visualise anything that turns you on, don't limit your imagination, but try not to use porn as it draws focus away from your prostrate and onto your cock
  • if nothing's happening or you can't work the plug in comfortably though you're doing all the above, take short breaks or change position
  • re-up lube the toy and entrance as necessary, which may include basting it into the rectum if you can't get enough in and around the area

In case of too much tension or pain on insertion: if you smoke and can tolerate, indica or CBD gummies relax your muscles, and lying on your back propped up with plenty of pillows under your tailbone also really helps.




Ofc goes without saying taking real cock is easier and more fun than either, of course, but we're not ready for that conversation.

All the best and have a nice time, fella.
All that planning, makes you question how natural gay sex is.
 

Phish

I told them to back off bcuz it wasnt their show
Forum Clout
45,212
DMAN I care about your well-being, so I've got a few technical tips I've gleaned over the years.



First PREP PREP PREP. That means:
  • pre-gaming plenty of fibre and supplementing hours before (we gays like psyllium husk in a smoothie or Weetabix)
  • evacuating bowels, then waiting a bit
  • minimum 20-30 minutes or more of enema/douching (bidet and/or small bulb in the shower on a jet setting should do it)
  • antibacterial wash
  • putting down towels, old ratty throws, pvc sheets or anything you don't mind getting wet or dirty on the play surface

n.b. If you're sticking with the plug--which if it was a gag gift not from a partner, likely isn't good quality--do wash/sterilise it first, and only use it if it at least has a wide horizontal handle so it can't disappear into you and get stuck. We're trying to save you from perforation or fistula, here.

Tbhwy I'd recommend the curious look into an Aneros Helix/Tempo device or something similar. Though it's pricey and trickier to master, once it clicks you'll get so much more out of it than a cheap plug. Failing that, Njoy do a fantastic steel plug range.




Then get the toy and lube ready:
  • If you find that you tense up at the cold of lube or toys, pre-warm them with body heat, a bowl of warm water or if you're feeling extra Frauey a hot water bottle.
  • For lube, you'll want proper water-based stuff, or pure aloe gel. Don't be too much of a hippie and use shea butter, ghee, coconut oil, lotion or Vaseline etc. as they stain everything with grease, stink, chafe, and trap and spread bacteria/e.coli.


Next:
  • massage with fingers slowly (including the gooch and surrounding glute muscles, it's all connected)
  • abdominal breathing in a steady pattern
  • contract and release the PC muscles in a chain/wave effect
  • visualise anything that turns you on, don't limit your imagination, but try not to use porn as it draws focus away from your prostrate and onto your cock
  • if nothing's happening or you can't work the plug in comfortably though you're doing all the above, take short breaks or change position
  • re-up lube the toy and entrance as necessary, which may include basting it into the rectum if you can't get enough in and around the area

In case of too much tension or pain on insertion: if you can tolerate them, indica or CBD gummies relax your muscles. Lying on your back propped up with plenty of pillows under your tailbone also really helps.




Ofc goes without saying taking real cock is easier and more fun than either, but we're not ready for that conversation.

All the best and have a nice time, fella.

Great advice!, i assume. Fella really seems to know how to wreck ones keister. Let us know how it goes DMAN. Youll probably love it
 

Jen_Tomlinson

Everyone’s alt
Forum Clout
13,371
DMAN I care about your well-being, so I've got a few technical tips I've gleaned over the years.



First PREP PREP PREP. That means:
  • pre-gaming plenty of fibre and supplementing hours before (we gays like psyllium husk in a smoothie or Weetabix)
  • evacuating bowels, then waiting a bit
  • minimum 20-30 minutes or more of enema/douching (bidet and/or small bulb in the shower on a jet setting should do it)
  • antibacterial wash
  • putting down towels, old ratty throws, pvc sheets or anything you don't mind getting wet or dirty on the play surface

n.b. If you're sticking with the plug--which if it was a gag gift not from a partner, likely isn't good quality--do wash/sterilise it first, and only use it if it at least has a wide horizontal handle so it can't disappear into you and get stuck. We're trying to save you from perforation or fistula, here.

Tbhwy I'd recommend the curious look into an Aneros Helix/Tempo device or something similar. Though it's pricey and trickier to master, once it clicks you'll get so much more out of it than a cheap plug. Failing that, Njoy do a fantastic steel plug range.




Then get the toy and lube ready:
  • If you find that you tense up at the cold of lube or toys, pre-warm them with body heat, a bowl of warm water or if you're feeling extra Frauey a hot water bottle.
  • For lube, you'll want proper water-based stuff, or pure aloe gel. Don't be too much of a hippie and use shea butter, ghee, coconut oil, lotion or Vaseline etc. as they stain everything with grease, stink, chafe, and trap and spread bacteria/e.coli.


Next:
  • massage with fingers slowly (including the gooch and surrounding glute muscles, it's all connected)
  • abdominal breathing in a steady pattern
  • contract and release the PC muscles in a chain/wave effect
  • visualise anything that turns you on, don't limit your imagination, but try not to use porn as it draws focus away from your prostrate and onto your cock
  • if nothing's happening or you can't work the plug in comfortably though you're doing all the above, take short breaks or change position
  • re-up lube the toy and entrance as necessary, which may include basting it into the rectum if you can't get enough in and around the area

In case of too much tension or pain on insertion: if you can tolerate them, indica or CBD gummies relax your muscles. Lying on your back propped up with plenty of pillows under your tailbone also really helps.




Ofc goes without saying taking real cock is easier and more fun than either, but we're not ready for that conversation.

All the best and have a nice time, fella.
@Emily from reddit get your ass ready
 

TravisPickle

DMAN did nothing wrong.
Forum Clout
55,797
If you lick a girls asshole while show tunes are playing in the background, does that make you gay?
There is no difference between a male anus and a female anus, other than the fact that her vagina is less than a quarter of an inch away. How do women live like that? They must have shit in their cunts constantly.
 

Scott Peterson Fanclub

Klansgender Rights
Forum Clout
1,919
There is no difference between a male anus and a female anus, other than the fact that her vagina is less than a quarter of an inch away. How do women live like that? They must have shit in their cunts constantly.
That’s why you have them against the wall naked, while you turn a fire hose on them.
Stick an air freshener between their butt cheeks after for that new car smell.
 

Patrick O'Neal

Forum Clout
39,306
DMAN I care about your well-being, so I've got a few technical tips I've gleaned over the years.



First PREP PREP PREP. That means:
  • pre-gaming plenty of fibre and supplementing hours before (we gays like psyllium husk in a smoothie or Weetabix)
  • evacuating bowels, then waiting a bit
  • minimum 20-30 minutes or more of enema/douching (bidet and/or small bulb in the shower on a jet setting should do it)
  • antibacterial wash
  • putting down towels, old ratty throws, pvc sheets or anything you don't mind getting wet or dirty on the play surface

n.b. If you're sticking with the plug--which if it was a gag gift not from a partner, likely isn't good quality--do wash/sterilise it first, and only use it if it at least has a wide horizontal handle so it can't disappear into you and get stuck. We're trying to save you from perforation or fistula, here.

Tbhwy I'd recommend the curious look into an Aneros Helix/Tempo device or something similar. Though it's pricey and trickier to master, once it clicks you'll get so much more out of it than a cheap plug. Failing that, Njoy do a fantastic steel plug range.




Then get the toy and lube ready:
  • If you find that you tense up at the cold of lube or toys, pre-warm them with body heat, a bowl of warm water or if you're feeling extra Frauey a hot water bottle.
  • For lube, you'll want proper water-based stuff, or pure aloe gel. Don't be too much of a hippie and use shea butter, ghee, coconut oil, lotion or Vaseline etc. as they stain everything with grease, stink, chafe, and trap and spread bacteria/e.coli.


Next:
  • massage with fingers slowly (including the gooch and surrounding glute muscles, it's all connected)
  • abdominal breathing in a steady pattern
  • contract and release the PC muscles in a chain/wave effect
  • visualise anything that turns you on, don't limit your imagination, but try not to use porn as it draws focus away from your prostrate and onto your cock
  • if nothing's happening or you can't work the plug in comfortably though you're doing all the above, take short breaks or change position
  • re-up lube the toy and entrance as necessary, which may include basting it into the rectum if you can't get enough in and around the area

In case of too much tension or pain on insertion: if you can tolerate them, indica or CBD gummies relax your muscles. Lying on your back propped up with plenty of pillows under your tailbone also really helps.




Ofc goes without saying taking real cock is easier and more fun than either, but we're not ready for that conversation.

All the best and have a nice time, fella.

This is why I come (cum???) here! :ROFLMAO:
 

FoundryMusicDanny

There was high latency delay on the screen.
Forum Clout
31
You're trying to imitate the DMAN (who the admins banned) but you can't even make your post longer than 4 sentences? If you don't want your bits to fail, at least put effort in.
 

nasty twp

Forum Clout
4,050
If you lick a girls asshole while show tunes are playing in the background, does that make you gay?

Depends on the show and singer in question.


Any Sondheim is a definite green for closet gay, if that helps. Betty Buckley is another tell, straights have only heard of Elaine Paige or Barbra.
 

AntSucks

★ ★ ★ ★ ☆
Forum Clout
22,203
DMAN I care about your well-being, so I've got a few technical tips I've gleaned over the years.



First PREP PREP PREP. That means:
  • pre-gaming plenty of fibre and supplementing hours before (we gays like psyllium husk in a smoothie or Weetabix)
  • evacuating bowels, then waiting a bit
  • minimum 20-30 minutes or more of enema/douching (bidet and/or small bulb in the shower on a jet setting should do it)
  • antibacterial wash
  • putting down towels, old ratty throws, pvc sheets or anything you don't mind getting wet or dirty on the play surface

n.b. If you're sticking with the plug--which if it was a gag gift not from a partner, likely isn't good quality--do wash/sterilise it first, and only use it if it at least has a wide horizontal handle so it can't disappear into you and get stuck. We're trying to save you from perforation or fistula, here.

Tbhwy I'd recommend the curious look into an Aneros Helix/Tempo device or something similar. Though it's pricey and trickier to master, once it clicks you'll get so much more out of it than a cheap plug. Failing that, Njoy do a fantastic steel plug range.




Then get the toy and lube ready:
  • If you find that you tense up at the cold of lube or toys, pre-warm them with body heat, a bowl of warm water or if you're feeling extra Frauey a hot water bottle.
  • For lube, you'll want proper water-based stuff, or pure aloe gel. Don't be too much of a hippie and use shea butter, ghee, coconut oil, lotion or Vaseline etc. as they stain everything with grease, stink, chafe, and trap and spread bacteria/e.coli.


Next:
  • massage with fingers slowly (including the gooch and surrounding glute muscles, it's all connected)
  • abdominal breathing in a steady pattern
  • contract and release the PC muscles in a chain/wave effect
  • visualise anything that turns you on, don't limit your imagination, but try not to use porn as it draws focus away from your prostrate and onto your cock
  • if nothing's happening or you can't work the plug in comfortably though you're doing all the above, take short breaks or change position
  • re-up lube the toy and entrance as necessary, which may include basting it into the rectum if you can't get enough in and around the area

In case of too much tension or pain on insertion: if you can tolerate them, indica or CBD gummies relax your muscles. Lying on your back propped up with plenty of pillows under your tailbone also really helps.




Ofc goes without saying taking real cock is easier and more fun than either, but we're not ready for that conversation.

All the best and have a nice time, fella.

Sounds like so much fucking work. At least nobody will ever accuse a fag of being lazy.
 

nasty twp

Forum Clout
4,050
Sounds like so much fucking work. At least nobody will ever accuse a fag of being lazy.

I mean, these aren’t hard rules, moreso etiquette guidelines for the civilised.

You can just dive straight in like. There are scat queens or sloppy tops & bottoms who aren’t bothered about prep or sanitation. Likewise some straight people who are really into anal and don’t care about hygiene. If you like and want it that way, you certainly can find it, best of luck to you.

I just happen to like a sparkling workspace, and I don’t enjoy giardia. The bussy is a sacred space to me, and there are others of my ilk. Call me the Queen of Clean.

1746883684752.jpeg
 
Last edited:
Top