Take the Shane Noakes Challenge

[Roslyn Vampire]

The Shane Noakes Challenge is where you tell a story about a job you did a long time ago at a company you are no longer employed by and make it your entire personality. I'll start:

About 8 years ago, I was working for a software company and we went to the Cisco Live! trade event. I was pivotal in helping prospective customers learn more about the company and its products and the CEO of the company congratulated me when we returned home.

As a result, I know everything about trade shows, software engineering and Cisco hardware. Anyone who has ever been to a trade show, uses the internet or software should bow down to me and support me financially on my move since I did so much for them.

Thank you.

 

[guest]

Shit, I should have read the first post before I put this butter knife in my ass.

 

[PickleRickle]

The Shane Noakes Challenge is where you tell a story about a job you did a long time ago at a company you are no longer employed by and make it your entire personality. I'll start:

About 8 years ago, I was working for a software company and we went to the Cisco Live! trade event. I was pivotal in helping prospective customers learn more about the company and its products and the CEO of the company congratulated me when we returned home.

As a result, I know everything about trade shows, software engineering and Cisco hardware. Anyone who has ever been to a trade show, uses the internet or software should bow down to me and support me financially on my move since I did so much for them.

Thank you.

Wow, I better never have a differing opinion than you in an unrelated topic, or you're surely rub my nose in it.

 

[Roslyn Vampire]

Wow, I better never have a differing opinion than you in an unrelated topic, or you're surely rub my nose in it.

FUCK YOU YOU BOTTOM FEEDING BASEMENT DWELLER NAZI PEDOPHILE, CISCO LIVE IS THE MOST IMPORTANT EVENT FOR CISCO HARDWARE USERS AND DEVELOPERS AND I. WAS. THERE.

 

[PickleRickle]

FUCK YOU YOU BOTTOM FEEDING BASEMENT DWELLER NAZI PEDOPHILE, CISCO LIVE IS THE MOST IMPORTANT EVENT FOR CISCO HARDWARE USERS AND DEVELOPERS AND I. WAS. THERE.

I started going to events by 3 years old. By the age of 8, I was the event.

You're SO fucking stupid.

 

[Roslyn Vampire]

I started going to events by 3 years old. By the age of 8, I was the event.

You're SO fucking stupid.

I handmade my first Cisco Catalyst 3560 when I was 6 years old and I still have all my credentials from that old Cisco Live! event.

 

[guest]

I’m going to need to see the parking validation they gave you on the first day at the office in order to believe you.

 

[Roslyn Vampire]

I’m going to need to see the parking validation they gave you on the first day at the office in order to believe you.

Once I finish my move, I will go through my keepsake-memento boxes and find it for you. My mother kept the hair from my first haircut and babyteeth as well so I will share pictures of that as well.

 

[DeadWithoutMyDavid]

I worked for McDonald's as a teenager. You know, McDonald's? The MEGA corporation in dozens of countries? On a nightly basis I was integral to a fast, efficient, and sanitary milkshake machine breakdown procedure. The regional supervisor even remarked on how much better I was than most of my 35 year old drug addict coworkers.

Yeah, I'm the real deal.

 

[ThePepsiColaRapist]

I am qualified to work in publishing because of my background in print media distribution.

Spoiler

I had a paper route between the ages 9-12.

 

[Turk February]

6 or 7 years ago at my first teaching job I was tasked with coaching a 6th grade debate team. Not the actual team, but the team our real team got to practice against. My team were expected to lose, which they did. I did a good job because my team lost. How many of you non debating nazi stlakers have even been in a 6th grade debate, let alone at the age of 26, when many would say you're too old to be doing 6th grade debate?

 

[Pringle Can Lothario]

Keep sucking that corporate dick, Shame.

 

[Brooke Shields]

My first legal paycheck job during highschool was at a high class restaurant, yeah hombre, I washed dishes

but I was just a white kid, and i got good at it too homess, tu madre es una perra
anyways some other random kid got put on the line one weekend, fresh off the boat or whatever chico, and I saw him wearing some plastic protective gloves like he was scared of wet rice....
Little did I know, HE WAS WASHING ALL OF THE POTS N PANS WITH COLD WATER, a chef even confronted him about it (I dunno maybe I was supposed to tell him but I wasn't feelin his water) his gay-ass gloves made me not wanna talk to him

 

[Opesterino]

My first legal paycheck job during highschool was at a high class restaurant, yeah hombre, I washed dishes

but I was just a white kid, and i got good at it too homess, tu madre es una perra
anyways some other random kid got put on the line one weekend, fresh off the boat or whatever chico, and I saw him wearing some plastic protective gloves like he was scared of wet rice....
Little did I know, HE WAS WASHING ALL OF THE POTS N PANS WITH COLD WATER, a chef even confronted him about it (I dunno maybe I was supposed to tell him but I wasn't feelin his water) his gay-ass gloves made me not wanna talk to him

lol my first job was washing dishes over a summers vacation. at first everything was cool but after a while the skin on my palms started to peel.. like layer after layer, onion style. So I went with the gloves.. Which didn't help as they just held water - ended up quitting after a while and it took over 3 months for my hands to go back to normal. I have terrible skin tho - maybe bam could give me some pointers.

 

[iBangedQuasi]

My first job was working at Michaels arts and crafts slinging foam balls to middle schoolers for their solar system project. I am basically Pablo fucking Picasso now and high end art galleries phone ME when they need a million dollar plus piece of art authenticated. So if you don't have the Louvre or The Met on speed dial you're just a sad Nazi pedophile sack of shit