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Always take a spare phone. I dropped mine when zooted and it was a bitch buying a new one in a country where thry dont speak english.
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Travel by yourself so you're not in a state of simmering irritation the entire time
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Rape
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Don’t go to Israel.
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Lol. You mean not being able to go snowboarding because your chick decided it was time to cry over nothing isnt a good way to spend your vacation time?
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Also the endless complaining. Yeah go ahead and wear boots instead of sneakers even though you know full fucking well we'll be walking all day, make sure to whine about your dumb feet hurting all afternoon and into the night. RAPE. RAPE
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Yeah lets go back to the hotel. Thats why i came to sweden, for the hotel room. Its too cold outside and theres too much walking, i understand.
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1. If you have a very short amount of time in a place, hire a private driver/guide to take you around to all the spots. We did this when we were in Kyoto for 1 day and saw twice as much stuff as we would have trying to do it ourselves with public transport. And the guide did a good job telling us about everything too.
2. If you’re going to a big tourist spot, try to go right after kids go back to school if you can. Early fall or mid January is a great time to travel, you’ll get good deals and way fewer screaming kids.
2. If you’re going to a big tourist spot, try to go right after kids go back to school if you can. Early fall or mid January is a great time to travel, you’ll get good deals and way fewer screaming kids.
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Don't take a bunch of Xanax before flying for the first time.
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Ehat happenes?
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Try to fuck all the asian women you see
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Good idea
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Rapesylvania is fine this time of year. The rape trees are in full bloom, and rape abortions are up. Best to buy in stock while you still can.
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Wallet in the front pocket, funsters, and when checking a map or phone, step away from crowd to back up against a wall or building
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You need your good boy phone and your naughty boy phone
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Wallet chains are cool and functional.
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Reading all the "travel alone..." advice/complaints has made me realize I'm the woman in my relationship.
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Get totally hammered and drive as fast as possible. Make sure you don't know the language or your way around. Drive the wrong way up streets until you're blocked in and get out and offer to thrash the old man driving the right way until he pulls a 1911 on you, then back out of the street and find a different way.
Also assume all White tourists speak English. Drive up to them and when they can't understand you after a case of beer, bellow your wishes for them to acquire tropical diseases in their anus.
Or use Waze, I dunno.
Also assume all White tourists speak English. Drive up to them and when they can't understand you after a case of beer, bellow your wishes for them to acquire tropical diseases in their anus.
Or use Waze, I dunno.
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Shout "I'm an American citizen goddamit!" at the slightest inconvenience.
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Ok so assuming you've made it to the airport, then what???