Patrick's boring life

[Patrick O'Neal]

He's never been anywhere, never done anything. Never done drugs. Never had crazy friends. Never had a casual sex phase. Never had a criminal phase.

That's why he loves the attention from those guys on Reddit so much.

He's not even ashamed to be an absurd figure of fun because he finally has a story to tell!

Some attractive women were discussing his meltdown on Facebook and he immediately trotted up announce: "Yes, I was the small penised man shouting and crying at female police officers, AMA!"

I'm almost impressed at how little shame he has.

ABSOLUTELY he's going to try to leverage this into some kind of fame. He probably thinks his life is basically a movie at this point.

Personally, I think he should start boxing the Bagel Dwarf or beefing with William Hung.

 

[HotDogJoe]

Some attractive women were discussing his meltdown on Facebook and he immediately trotted up announce: "Yes, I was the small penised man shouting and crying at female police officers, AMA!"

I sure hope nobody shares the bodycam footage with said women once we have it. That would be very unfortunate indeed.

 

[guest]

. Never had crazy friends

Wrong again, my succulent summer child.

[MEDIA=youtube]en5oZYkaKLs[/MEDIA]

 

[Former Prez Gerald Ford]

Wrong again, my succulent summer child.

I hate his mouth so much. I just want someone to explain to me why it looks like that.

 

[RobertMewler]

I hate his mouth so much. I just want someone to explain to me why it looks like that.

Ask this piece of shit:

 

[DanFielding]

I hate his mouth so much. I just want someone to explain to me why it looks like that.

He has shitty genetics. Hence the mongoloid cranium, fish lips, ans effeminate voice.

 

[BakersfieldChimp]

He had a period where he was buried in strange, aTalker.

 

[Easily_Remembered]

Ask this piece of shit:

Definitely the face of a master marksman, champion bull rider and strident George Carlin historian.

"That George Carlin fella sure gave one humdinger of a set the other night, I tell you what!".

*pushes up glasses"

"Anyhoo, anyone up for some target practice?"

 

[TheYepster]

I hate his mouth so much. I just want someone to explain to me why it looks like that.

I think there are few videos of him having spits in the folds and it was like pulling on cheese

 

[MunchausenByProxy]

Wrong again, my succulent summer child.

Yeah man, we got pretty fawkin tore up brah

 

[IGotATreeOnMyHouse85]

Good lord that video is awful, he doesn’t even show the bottle properly because he’s too busy trying to make sure you can see his stupid fat face. Also he’s like late 30s here and bragging about getting “tore up” with some dude.

 

[Meownaw]

Bagel Dwarf

In hell? That nigga dead.

 

[guest]

Wrong again, my succulent summer child.

[MEDIA=youtube]en5oZYkaKLs[/MEDIA]

His eye movement when he says "I guess it's my turn" is so fucking femme. He really is a cocksucker

 

[Ladynyahh]

Wrong again, my succulent summer child.

Normal behavior for men in their late 30s

 

[DrTorqueCarlisi]

He probably thinks his life is basically a movie at this point.

"Hi I'm Pig O. My life's a movie."

(Dear anonymous Dan, I still love ya. That's why I want to make sure you know this is a Ron and Fez reference. Long ago they shared a channel with Opie and Anthony, if you've heard of them.)

 

[Guinness525]

Wrong again, my succulent summer child.

Such an unflattering angle. To this day, he films his bloated melon like this. You can almost feel his breath.

I will say that he looks less nasty here. More healthy and almost human. You really don’t see him make videos with anyone but his wife anymore.

Where are all your chums, Rick?

 

[FranksWirecutters]

Good lord that video is awful, he doesn’t even show the bottle properly because he’s too busy trying to make sure you can see his stupid fat face. Also he’s like late 30s here and bragging about getting “tore up” with some dude.

Well he did have to sit on an inflatable donut for a week after this video due to needing a few stiches. I also heard all of his burps had a distinct musky scent.

 

[TheRevAlJolson]

Wrong again, my succulent summer child.

This nigga gey

 

[guest]

He's never been anywhere, never done anything. Never done drugs. Never had crazy friends. Never had a casual sex phase. Never had a criminal phase.

He really wants people to think he's the next coming of The Most Interesting Man in the world but in reality he's a fat dullard with nothing interesting to say. He hears about some stupid fat and he oinks it out on the internet to sound like he's a learned pig. He's like that douche on Good Will Hunting, except Torque hides the Will Hunting retorts about how wrong and stupid he is. Also he's way too stupid to ever go to Harvard.