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Nice work ethic, stupid.

DanMullen'sRetardedNephew

Opie Simp
Forum Clout
89,876
How it started:

6.png


How it's going:

5.png


14k words in nearly two months. Turns out writing in a bar is horrible for productivity, who'd have thought?
 

HotDogJoe

Professional leech since 1994. Anyone can do it.
Forum Clout
79,959
311ish words a day. At this rate he will be done Christmas of 2023

That's fucking atrocious when you take into account that he considers writing his full time job and this is the only thing he's working on right now. I guess obsessively refreshing Twitter, responding to the stlakers and getting into fights online are important business though.

He's so deserving of the shitty life he has.
 

Brooke Shields

Patrick Tomlinson hates me because I am a woman
Forum Clout
68,196
Fucking first sentence in his picture:
"Scrooge was dead, to begin with."

I know there's something about not ending sentences with "with" or "to", i learned that shit in the 5th grade but I still do it anyway since I'm not being graded anymore. This professional author on the other hand...
 

Jenna

very demure very cutesy very mindful very modest
Forum Clout
64,068
Fucking first sentence in his picture:
"Scrooge was dead, to begin with."

I know there's something about not ending sentences with "with" or "to", i learned that shit in the 5th grade but I still do it anyway since I'm not being graded anymore. This professional author on the other hand...

It seriously bugs the shit out of me that he's writing an action novel called Christmas Carnage, described by Patrick as a "bloody rampage through the London underworld" and that's how he starts it.

The inciting incident of the whole fucking novel. I guess an amateur author would take the inciting incident more seriously, perhaps write a bloody rampage in the first chapter. So the schmuck at the bookstore who buys Christmas Carnage gets some of that aforementioned Christmas Carnage right out of the gate.

No no no, the professional author takes care of that in six words. Three words actually, with "to begin with" tacked onto the end. Then, onto what Patrick really brings to the table: drunken confusing horseshit. The spirits labored to imbue within him. Squandered in pursuit of Sterling pounds at the expense of the suffering of those fate has placed in his charge. 100% pretentious horseshit from an alcoholic who thinks the booze makes him brilliant.
 

victor_sanchez

buck breaker supreme
Forum Clout
7,490
he's a twitter reply guy that lives off welfare and writes shitty sci fi novels as a HOBBY. he'll never come to terms with that but it's true.

not sure if there's a twitter bot that can get a word count of all his tweets since dec. 22, but i'm willing to bet good money that it would be way over 14k words.

also, twitter has cost him so much money and productivity that any other person would quit using that service like it was a heroin addiction. rick is too stupid and fame-obessed to make that drastic change. he's also very, very, fat with a hefty pair of bazongas.
 
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