Need a lil' help from UK* brothamen (Uni shite)

[alkiefuck2]

*Scots preferable, but don't bite the hand...*

First time caller.. I need to apply for uni, currently doing Soft Dev HND if that means anything (basically looking for IT courses)
In the personal statement, do you list you're good with 'x, y, z,' language or just a normal "I'm cool as fuck, genuinely, I'd tell you if I wasn't. I make fun of retards etc." type statement? Stressing out like a faggot over here, I'm away to bed just now but I'd appreciate any replies (funnier the better). I'll hang up and listen to the answer ;)

*Scottish uni is different, England's down there, but we're up here now

 

[Lamont & Tonelli]

Is it true that you Scots sometimes call the English "Mexicans"?

 

[Stent]

Have you tried calling the university to ask them? Just say you're applying for software courses, they'll think you're autistic and talk like you're socially retarded. Answer every question with "Are you trying to have sex with me?"

 

[Dennyislife]

It's still free in Scotland right?

Who cares.

 

[The Talking Dead]

Probably wanna post somewhere less autistic than this if want serious answers lol. This is probably one of those occasions where the little faggots on Reddit would be of some use. I’m sure there’s a Scotland subreddit.

 

[AntSucks]

Just say you post on a forum for a defunct shock jock radio show and they'll know straight away that you're autistic as fuck and place you in the right class.

 

[The Shah of Iran]

*Scots preferable, but don't bite the hand...*

First time caller.. I need to apply for uni, currently doing Soft Dev HND if that means anything (basically looking for IT courses)
In the personal statement, do you list you're good with 'x, y, z,' language or just a normal "I'm cool as fuck, genuinely, I'd tell you if I wasn't. I make fun of retards etc." type statement? Stressing out like a faggot over here, I'm away to bed just now but I'd appreciate any replies (funnier the better). I'll hang up and listen to the answer ;)

Fuck we're going back 20 years here, if I remember correctly it's a bit of both. They want you to be good at shit but also that you're not going to Virginia Tech the fuckin place. Just tell them you've been doin' radio since you were fawkin' 18.

Oh yeah tell them you're dysplexic too, they'll give you free laptops and shit. You may have to act retarded for a while but totally worth it

 

[alkiefuck2]

fuck the lot of you sniff

 

[BrotherMan1488]

I want a full English Breakfast

 

[Dennyislife]

Fuck we're going back 20 years here, if I remember correctly it's a bit of both. They want you to be good at shit but also that you're not going to Virginia Tech the fuckin place. Just tell them you've been doin' radio since you were fawkin' 18.

Oh yeah tell them you're dysplexic too, they'll give you free laptops and shit. You may have to act retarded for a while but totally worth it

My handwriting is so shit I got given a laptop. I got work done so quickly in stuff like English where a lot of writing was required. I kinda regret not going to uni for the debt I would have got but my uni going friends are still working and I am semi retired so I guess I won.

 

[aRTie02150]

I don't care for Scottish people.

Nice kilt, stupid.

 

[Chapel]

Is it true that you Scots sometimes call the English "Mexicans"?

No, we call them heathen Sassenach

 

[alkiefuck2]

I don't care for Scottish people.

Nice kilt, stupid.

The puerto rican pretending he doesn't like the fact we carry knives in our socks?
Don't think so

 

[Brenton Torrent]

*Scots preferable, but don't bite the hand...*

First time caller.. I need to apply for uni, currently doing Soft Dev HND if that means anything (basically looking for IT courses)
In the personal statement, do you list you're good with 'x, y, z,' language or just a normal "I'm cool as fuck, genuinely, I'd tell you if I wasn't. I make fun of retards etc." type statement? Stressing out like a faggot over here, I'm away to bed just now but I'd appreciate any replies (funnier the better). I'll hang up and listen to the answer ;)

*Scottish uni is different, England's down there, but we're up here now

I believe they want a mix of skills, achievements (not academic accomplishments, should be a separate section for that) and special, unique qualities. Maybe chuck a subtle O&A reference in there so that Saint Mel will intervene and insure success.

 

[alkiefuck2]

Brothermen, brothermen. I'll fill it out with the usual shite but how does one slip in an o&a reference? The more meta the even bettah.

 

[aRTie02150]

The puerto rican pretending he doesn't like the fact we carry knives in our socks?
Don't think so

Oh I didn't know that.

I guess Scottish people are okay.


I REALLY don't care for Icelandic people though.

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

Oh I didn't know that.

I guess Scottish people are okay.


I REALLY don't care for Icelandic people though.

Yeah Scots are cool. My ex who stabbed me was Scottish.

 

[alkiefuck2]

I guess Scottish people are okay.

No, all of them are gay hence:

My ex who stabbed me up the arse was Scottish

unlucky, my man