I broke my toilet seat dude.

[Chive Turkey]

Now I have to replace one for the first time in my life. What do I do.

 

[chocolatehellhole]

Just squat

 

[Rick Roblinson]

I broke my toilet seat dude. I broke my toilet seat man. Hold my hand.

 

[DMbA]

Get a bidet the ones that shoots water

 

[Leonard Rhomberg]

Just make sure you get the one where it closes slowly on its own when you tip it over

 

[Chive Turkey]

Get a bidet the ones that shoots water

I made a vow long ago never to put liquid up my ass again and I don't intend to break it.

 

[DiarrheaDick]

Now I have to replace one for the first time in my life. What do I do.

Call a plumber so they can laugh at you too.

 

[DMbA]

I made a vow long ago never to put liquid up my ass again and I don't intend to break it.

You got to wash your butt stinky

 

[LockedHDD__Pot]

do you really need help tightening 2 plastic bolts? It's impossible to tell tbf

 

[JebJoh]

You need 2 tools and 3 minutes. Maybe 3 tools if you have one of those high flautín toilets with the plastic caps on the bolts.

 

[Dog Eater]

Enjoy the dried piss hiding under the plastic bolts.

 

[Nick Gerlips]

Enjoy the dried piss hiding under the plastic bolts.

Yeah, just replace the toilet at this point.

 

[Mass.gov]

Literally the easiest thing to replace/install...

 

[Uncle Floyd]

Yeah, just replace the toilet at this point.

A complete bathroom reno shouldn't be off the table.

 

[Lunkhead]

I made a vow long ago never to put liquid up my ass again and I don't intend to break it.

Nah it's worth it, even if it's a little fruity. If the stream is strong enough, it'll dislodge any rebellious turds that don't want to leave and you'll end up only having to use TP as a safety check.

 

[Chive Turkey]

rebellious turds

I'm not going to follow your advice but thanks for the great fawkin band name.

 

[Turk February]

its tricky but not impossible, my stupid exwife broke it off the hinges but its like a 5 minute repair even if you dont know anything about tools, its all working with your hands

 

[StlakerFatti]

don't believe these trolls, it's a really complicated repair that takes lots of time. most people let a professional do it.

 

[DMAN]

Makes it easier to drain your beef. WHAT'S IN THAT TACO MEAT!?

IS IT FULL OF LITTLE CHIHUAHUA FEET?

IS IT MADE FROM ROADKILL IN THE STREET?

DO THEY JUST SLAP SOME SAUCE ON IT AND HEAT?

OH MY GOD!!!!! CHALUPAS ARE SUCH A DELICIOUS SNACK!

I LIKE TO BUY AND EAT THEM BY THE SACK!

BUT WHEN THEIR MEATS ALIVE, DOES IT SAY "QUACK?"

 

[captain_kamala]

I did it but my toilet was the long oval type and I bought the short circular seat. Was fine.