Did Brother Joe Help Write The Description For Nana's House?

[CuckQueen]

"Welcome home to this picture of paradise. "
So it's not paradise, just a picture of it?

"This stunning home boasts every amenity one can imagine."
I'm sure it does, if your imagination is limited to an in-ground pool and basement karaoke.

"Elegance greets you at the entry hallway."
Only if Elegance is the name of Ant's new tranny "girl"friend.

"Five well appointed bedrooms, Five full baths and two half baths."
Five whole bedrooms? This is a real castle.

"Chef's Kitchen opens up to the Family Room with vaulted ceilings."
Chef's Kitchen has never contained a chef, Family Room has never had a family.

"A backyard paradise awaits you complete with in ground salt water pool, hot tub, fire pit area with pergola and pool house with half bath."
An eight of an acre paradise only rivaled by the pool area of a Motel 6.

"Private Movie Theater and Full Pub Style Bar in the lower level."
Wow, a private movie theater? I thought a house would have a public movie theater. And Full Pub Style Bar? You mean a wooden shelf of Captain Morgan and Coke?

"85KW whole house generator."
Why yes, the previous owner was a paranoiac with delusions of non-faggotry in an apocalypse.

"See attached amenity sheet for further details."
What other details? It's not a fucking mansion, this about wraps it up.

'This is the home that you have been dreaming of."
If you were a successful radio show host with no taste before you lost your career.

 

[Easily_Remembered]

Couldn't be Joe. Not enough capitalization.

 

[Mr. Faggotry]

There are many problems with that house of horrors but the biggest one is the postage stamp sized yard. Both of those guys were making enough cash to buy an entire Roslyn Heights neighborhood but he went cheap.

 

[MunchausenByProxy]

“Elegant” is how Anthonys family described him growing up as to not upset his grandmother

 

[Naked_Militiaman]

A home so elegant even an MSNBC VIEWER could appreciate it (of course owning a house would require them to move out of their parent’s basement into the REAL world.) If you aren’t a redditard then come to the next open house where the minibar is open and masks are OPTIONAL (remember that all Nazi paraphernalia you see is not included in the purchase of the home because there are no FREE LUNCHES).

 

[Snake]

Private Movie Theater

That children were fucked in.

 

[Coonskin]

Private Movie Theater

That children were fucked in.

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There is that one photo of that passed out chick with her pussy hanging out in the first row of seats. Send that to any prospecting buyers

 

[FurBurger]

"Your own little piece of Little St James, right here on Long Island - look for us in the sex offender's registry!"

 

[Sputnik]

In Anths defense it’s one of the less gaudy house a black person has owned.

 

[guest]

Imagine the disappointment potential buyers feel when they arrive for the viewing.

 

[FLUUUID]

Imagine the disappointment potential buyers feel when they arrive for the viewing.

If any of those people have buyers agents they should sue

 

[UnPRePared]

If only Michael Jackson and Jeffrey Epstein didn't die, Ant might have a buyer by now.