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Brother Joe sends strange message to the big apple ranch

NoBacon

NoBacon

An honourable man.
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As a long-time patron of your establishment, I’ve always enjoyed my visits. However, I must admit I’ve been a bit disappointed lately by the noticeable lack of what I can only describe as “Spartan male action” on the premises — something I’ve come to expect (even if only metaphorically 😉) from such a dynamic venue.

In the spirit of the holiday season, I’d like to propose a way to make things right: allow my band, not 2U, to play a Christmas show at your venue as a U2 cover band. We promise an electrifying gay performance that will bring festive cheer and perhaps even deliver some of that epic energy your customers are craving.

The lead singer, Daniel Mullen (Bongo) is a hot piece of ass with an incredible set of pipes on him. I am The Ledge, and I’m the best guitarist in all of Long Island.

Thank you very much for considering this. I’m happy to discuss further at your convenience.

Warm regards,
Joseph Cumia
 
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